My nation 50 years of Independence.

Today is our nation, Malaysia's 50 years of Independence. We have gone a long way and we are proud of our achievement in every aspect of life. We have gained much and also lost some of our past. In the pursuit of progress, we have acquired tremendous amount of knowledge in every direction. From agricultural base, we are at industrial base now and advancing into high tech related technology.

In the pursuit of knowledge, I think we have lost the wisdom of understanding in simplicity of life. I can still remember those days when I was a little kid, our neighbour knew each other well. From one street corner to the other end, we knew each and every one of us. We shared and lived together like one big family. Although we were poorer and our life styles were simple, we never degraded and discriminated. During all festivals, we rest assured we were there to celebrate together. The harmony and kinship within us were beyond the admiration of the outside world.

Today we are proud to have low illiteracy with most having a degree in hand. We are knowledgeable in mind and thinking, and we have higher expectation in life too. Of course it is good that we have reached this level of thought, but we have lost the simplicity of mind as well. Today, we tend to be more arrogance, impatience, unfriendly, discriminate and selfish in nature.

My present neighbourhood is termed as higher middle class residents. Sad to say, we never mix at all. I don't even know the name of my next door neighbours. All our homes are built with higher retention walls which looked more like prison, rather than like a friendly home. If we ever happened to meet, instead of a smile, a hostile stare would be given. I wonder where all our wisdom of life has gone. Is this the side effect of progress and advancement? Or is it, too much of knowledge create self-esteem of the individual to loose the wisdom of thinking? Is scary but this is the true facts of life happening.

Napolean Hill said, "Life reflects your own thoughts back to you."

Do u know when to use hihi and haha?

Life has many splendors. It comes with our hihi, hehe, haha or hoho! We laugh within us or we let others to laugh. We laugh in physical face2face or in written words to express our inner feeling. The verbal laugh could be natural from our heart and mind. Not the written laugh because most of us wrote without really understood them. I used to receive emails or online chatting or the often text messages, written with laugh expression which I believe did not depict the real purposes. With a little practise by sounding those actual words, I could differentiate their meaning and effect.

To me, hihi or hehe are similar in nature. Written by man or woman to woman is alright but woman to man sounds inappropriate. Each time a lady who wrote such expression to me, I felt a bit of unfeminine feeling towards her. I think hihi or hehe denotes cunningness, crafty, tricky or suspicious in character.

Haha sounds better. If you doubt me, please try to throw out haha yourself and you will feel the joyfulness in you. Those who received the haha, know that the senders are meant to be happy in mood. Hoho is different. The senders are not laughing but he laughs against his receivers.

Out of these normal expression, I like to receive the "Huuuummm!", especially sent by ladies to me. It sounds very feminine and gentle in mood. More so if it is sent out in the night cause it reflexes the loving and romantic thought of love making.

I also like to receive the next best expression from ladies, "Muuuuurscch!" It has a sensational feeling of acceptance. It might not be a true and real kiss but the heart heals in every way.

The best and the killer will always be worded with the full contents. Write and send them over as "I Love You." These few words will definitely overrule the hihi or haha. These are also the facts of life in our telecommunication world.

Quote to be remembered, "The fragrance always remains on the hand that gives the rose." Spoken by Mahatma Gandhi

Life comes together with good & bad.

Hi readers! I am back in action again after a short break. Searching, reaching and observing how the world passed along. I strongly believe for whatever happened, there must be a reason, whether is good or bad. Just last nite, while returning home from our local airport, I witnessed a minor motor accident on the way. It created a commotion when all passing motorists slowing their vehicles just to stare at the accident. The polices were there to control the heavy traffic. The ambulance was there to provide medical assistance. The toll trucker was there to remove those damaged motor cars. A lot of bystanders watching and doing nothing. I am sure, they did not want to cause this accident with intention. On the other hand, without this accident all these people would not be around there. With the accident, the polices had a responsibility to shoulder, the ambulance brought medical attention and the toll trucker had extra job. Every one of them had an opportunity to provide services and attention which in turn translated into money or income. For this accident to happen, it allowed others to earn and live or to be in business. The accident could be considered as bad but on the other hand, the opportunity for others to assist the accident might be good. Its bad for some but could be good for others.

Looking at the world passes by, we definitely cannot escape the good and bad way of life. Whether you like it or not, we have to appreciate our life journey as a package of good and bad. Today you might be happy but tomorrow if you were to face with some sadness, do accept them as happiness as well.

Quoted by Hugh Downs, "A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes."

Would u dare to say I Love You?

I think the three most difficult words to be spoken are; "I LOVE YOU." We were taught to say them when we were young, we know they are meant to be nice, we want to say them and yet we find them so difficult to express them. It's easier to scold with the four bad letters word but to admit I love you is shameful. Is true! Cause whenever I wished my clients and friends their birthdays, I suggested to them to greet their spouses with the 'I Love You' added when they celebrated the night, not one darn to say them to their respective wives or husbands. They claimed, "Aiyah! too old for such romantic words" were their excuses.

The husband might want to say them and the wife would certainly love hearing these three words. However as Asian, we are the unromantic kind who prefers to keep "I Love You" in the heart and mind. Most of us would rather express our love and concern by action and attention to the one we loved. The words are hidden and we have to guess and sense them ourselves. It looks silly but that is the way we live.

With some understanding of life, today I realised that sound with words are important. As sound travels faster than physical action, it is more logical and practical to say and express my intention to the one I care. If I love my family, my girlfriends, my clients or associates, why wait to tell them. The minute I relate to them that I Love Them, which are so pleasant to hear, I know they will feel good with me. In such a win win situation, don't you think we should say I Love You more. You feel good after you say them, especially to the one you love most now.

The constitution of love code, "If you love someone, show them and say so!"

P/S Would be taking a short break when I won't be posting for a few days. Hopefully I would meet someone who can be so sweet and brave, as to tell me she loves me too. Bye!

U can sell better with a sense of humour.

Laughter is the best medicine for our heart. I gave them by applying sense of humour to all my approaches in every meeting, whether they were friends or strangers. Before I proceeded to the main reasons for each call, I always started with some jokes relevant to our meets. Depending on each personality and character, I created jokes and laughter related to their liking. To the good boys, my jokes were clean and fun and to the naughty guys, my humour could be the cheeky one. Meaning, I could talk heaven or hell, angels or devils, man or women, until they laugh through their heart. These were the fastest way to break the ice or egg for building good relationship in selling or even meeting new acquaintances.

To have good sense of humour, one has to develop this skill gradually. You need courage and plenty of creativity. Buy some books on fun and laughter where you can gather some sensible pointers. Once you have acquired the know how, you will be on a journey of fun and laughter. Nobody would be bored by your present and everyone loves to be associated with you. If you want to be an effective salesperson, learn to develop the art of having fun and laughter. Not only you can be successful in your career, you will be happier and heathier as well. Start to laugh now!

"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people." said Victor Borge.

Do u need the sales more than your clients?

Zig Ziglar said, "You can get everything you want, if you would just help enough people get what they want." It was well written, read, heard and listened but most of us still failed to follow these powerful words.

Many sale people had attended seminars and training related to inspiration and motivation to encourage them to work with determination. In fact, they certainly had but instead they have changed the above statement to, "You can get everything you want, if you would just help enough people can what 'YOU' want." Please read properly the definition again. It is YOU and not THEY. The you and they is a vast different.

I observed better from my life insurance industry to relate my experiences. Most rookie agents who came to this selling career, were highly motivated by money and glamour. They were told that they can get everything they want, like income, incentives, holidays, bonuses, recognition and extra benefits, if they could just bring in more sales. Each time a sale was brought back, a pat and congratulation was given to energize another sale again. How ethical and honest were the sales were unknown. What matter most were the sales again. Many were carried away at the beginning by forcing friends and relatives to purchase their products. Those were the easy and high stakes premium from people they knew. Without them realising, the truth would prevail when they have to depend on themselves later.

Selling life insurance isn't just the product of insurance plans. It is how much you understand life and death. The needs of the young, the dreams of the adult and the planning towards death later. If only rookie agents were not just motivated by money but rather being preached with life insurance as a religion, they would have understood the value of this miracle product. Instead of selling they should have listened and understood the people they met. Providing assistances, offering solutions, giving encouragement and selling benefits to the people.

The bottom line remains as, "You can get everything you want, if you would just help enough people get what THEY want." Believe these words in your doing and we won't be wrong for the future. I have had been doing these for the past 40 years and I won't reget doing it again for the next many years to come.

The selfish, greedy and stingy of us.

Quite sometimes back, I was asked, "Why most of us are selfish in this world?" Is true! All of us live by incentives. Without the carols, we might not strive for the extra miles. As children, we were promised of gifts and rewards, if we excelled in our studies and sports. Even as adults, we needed the recognition and bonuses to tempt us to work harder. Or even in the spiritual sense, we are promised of a better world, if we live right. It looks like the educational system, teaching and the way we were brought up, make us to be selfish, greedy and stingy.

As I was reading, I came across this meaningful statement of happiness which I like to share.

"People go through up and downs of life and constantly keep on searching happiness. While the way to happiness is: Keep your heart free from hate, Your mind from worry. Expect a little, give much. Fill your life with love. Scatter sunshine. Forget self, think of others. Do as you would done by. Live a simple life. Try this for a week and you will be surprised."

On phone, please smile.

Smiling helps us in every way of our life, even in selling. People like to deal with salesperson who is happy. Happiness of the person shows in the smile. If you smile, your face grows with sweetness and at the same times you feel the joy in yourself. When you smile and feel happy, you speak better and more effectively than when you are not. In my early days of selling when I need to speak on telephone with my prospects and clients, I always spoke in front of a mirror which was placed on my working desk. Before each call, I looked in the mirror and smiled. While talking on the phone, I never failed to keep smiling too. It really energized my thoughts and thinking. Until today, when I speak on the phone, I still provide that sweet smile while talking and chatting, for I believe those words will sound better and more acceptable.

If you are a person who needs to communicate on phone, it is high time that you should smile more, even it might not be a true smile. But with more practices, perhaps your smiles could be more natural given time.

Quote of the day, "Anger and frustration can be suppressed with smiles."

Sleeping position tells how romantic you are!

Last night while I was sleeping alone and staring at the ceiling on top, re-caped my past romance. When any young couples who sleep together, they seldom has a chance to stare at the ceiling. Rather, they would be eyeing and embracing each other. This is a position of impact love which is unmovable because love and lust are strong with desire. Given some time depending on the couple's age, the impact lover's position could be moved to the the ceiling direction. Perhaps lust and desire have fallen. Contentment leads to their balance position when they look straight and forward. They have developed trust and understand by staring at ceiling and holding hands on bed. However when things go wrong, like any misunderstanding or quarrels, the ceiling's stare will be turned to the opposite of their walls. No embracing for sure, no holding hands, non physical touching and without eye to eye contact any more. Looking straight to the walls with their backs facing each other depicts confrontation. It isn't a good position and if prolong for too long a period, couple may request for a separation.

Life is funny! Even the way we sleep with our mates can reflex our love for each other. So! Are you at impact's position, ceiling's stare or wall's confrontation? The choices are yours!Nonetheless, I rather pick the impact's position if given the choices again.

Aristotle said, "Happiness is a sort of action." The action in the way we live and treat our loves.

Women's smile is sweeter than men

Not many know how to smile right. There are the friendly smile or the killer's smile. I believe women smile sweeter than men coz they smile more often than males. Most women like to look at their faces whenever they have the opportunities. Before they leave the houses, they spend a bit of time to touch up their faces. While doing so, they smile with their beautiful facial. Not man, who just wash and comb their hair, and not bother so much to admire their look. Do you know, all working ladies carry small cosmetic mirrors in their handbags? Beside the toiletry visits, where they smile while washing their hands, they also smile with these cosmetic mirrors whenever they can. I guess most ladies look, admire and smile in front of mirrors more than 20 times a day. Whereas men are afraid to smile in front of themselves against mirror. If you don't believe gentlemen, how often when we go to the public washrooms, we dare to smile while washing our hands. Most likely they just wash their hands, have a quick stare at their own faces without a smile and walk away. Perhaps they are afraid or dislike their own faces, but not women because they do admire themselves with a proud smile, each time they see their own faces.

Smiling makes us happier and smiling allows us to meet more people. If you don't like or afraid to smile, it is high time to learn to smile now. Stand in front of your home mirror, smile until you know what smile is best for yourself. Man to man smile is different from man to woman. A friendly smile is different from a business smile. A naughty smile is different from a cheeky smile. A day smile is different from a night smile. Unless you have practised sufficiently on smiling, you would not know what smile is your killer's smile. If one is not happy to smile, most likely that person is an unhappy person. The best smile is the smile that smiles from the heart. The heart felt smile will make you healthier, lovelier and most acceptable by everyone. So smile as much as possible, don't be shy to even smile within yourself. I sincerely hope my words tickle your heart and mind to smile now...this very minute of time.

Quote of the day, "The beauty of our faces depend on the sweet smile we carry."

Smile does not cost a penny

I was having an afternoon tea with my driver in a coffee shop, when an Indian man approached us over our table. He was holding a stack of lottery tickets with intention to sell to me first. I had no thought to purchase but with a broad smile on my face, shook my head and offered him a soft 'thank you.' Immediately he turned towards my driver, waved his tickets to signal whether he wants. My driver responded with shaking his head too but with an expression of anger on his face instead. The ticket seller left instantly.

Later I politely asked my driver why he was disturbed by the ticket seller with an angry face. He gave no proper reason except that he did not like people to sell things to him on the road. At the same time he asked, "boss, why had you been so kind to this sale people. You don't have to thank you him." I smiled and said, "My thanks cost me nothing. But that thank you can give him hope. Is not easy for him to sell and peddle on the street. At least my smile and thank you can motivate and encourage him to go further. If that man has a choice, perhaps he won't have to sell on the street. Imagine if everyone rejects him totally, he might even turn to crime for his survival. At least now he is doing a decent work to sell and not to rob. My smile and gesture were an energy for him to go on in life."

Morale of the story; why makes life difficult for another person when we can be of help. After all a smile from us doesn't cost a penny but it works wonderfully for those who receive it.

Quote by Les Giblin, "If you're not using a smile, you're like a man with a million dollars in the bank and no checkbook."

Are your words sweet as ever?

Compliments, sweet words and well wishes are always a good starter for the morning. To say somethings nice to someone early of the day, will definitely helps.

I had a new driver who just started work with me. Although he is in the mid 50, physically he is strong in body and mind. One morning, out of manner my maid addressed him as "Pak Cik", which in English is as uncle, when without our knowing, he was very disturbed with that name. The "Pak Cik" sounded to him as very old like person. The whole day he wasn't not to himself and his work wasn't satisfactory to me. Later with some persuasion, he reluctantly told me how he felt about that lousy name. He could not accept to be called as "Pak Cik", especially from a younger woman. From that time onwards, I kindly requested my maid and my family to call him as "Abang" instead, another meaning as brother. Eventually there was no further occurrence, he was happy and excited with this addressing. Because uncle is older and brother is much younger.

Moral of this story; sweet words can be enlightening but wrong words can be disasterous.

How serious are you with love?

Women like to be loved upon by men. Some would take it seriously and some could play it like a game. I have two stories to relate, gathered during the interaction in lives.

Jenny had a blow in her early lives when her first husband was drowned while swimming in Port Dickson. He was a responsible and a caring man. For the first year after his death, Jenny wasn't happy and life was meaningless to her. Out of lonesome, she met another gentleman who married out later. He was equally a loving man like the late husband. It was almost like God sent to replace the earlier marriage. They are currently married for almost 15 years with two lovely daughters. I spoke to Jenny a few days back. She told me, it took her more than 10 years before she could totally forget her late husband. Till today, she did not relate this dying love to her present husband. Her reasoning was, "I love the man so much. I just can't forget the sweet memories we had. Even it was a short period of two good years with him."

Annie was another lucky lady who had a very caring and understanding man who loved her dearly. His love for her was so thick that he could almost do anything for her. Even prepared to die for the sake for her to live. However Annie took her career as important and she felt the relationship was a burden for her progress. She wanted independence more than love. One fine day, she told him that she wants to break this relationship and requested him just to take her as a normal friend. It was a terrible slap to the man who did no wrong. By loving her too much caused the breakup. She could instantly forget all the sweet loving memories and preferred to remain single. A cruel lady ended with a broken hearted man.

Life is uncertain! When you have it, you hate to have it, but when you don't have it, you cry for it. Perhaps these are the ways of life to make the world goes round. Not all can be happy and neither all can be sad.

A touching poem I will never forget,"If you are ever going to love; love me now. While I can know the sweet and tender feelings from which true affection flows. Love me now, while I am living. To have those sweet words chiseled in marble on ice-cold stone. If you have tender thoughts of me, please let me know now. Not when I am not there."

Are you a hunter?

Dog is man's best friend. The different is domestic pet dog and hunting dog. Pet dogs are easily seen in homes, whereas hunting dogs are not. Pet dogs look adorable, not hunting dogs which are skinny and unattractive. Pet dogs can live only in homes. If they are thrown into the wild jungles, they will not survive easily. Hunting dogs are exceptional because they have the instinct to live and hunt in the wild.

A good well trained salesperson is also a hunter. Thrown into the concrete jungle of the cities, he will survive. Like the hunting dogs, an effective salesperson knows how to hunt or prospect his future clients. He has the instinct to smell a potential or non potential prospect. He has courage to approach and create opportunity for himself. His hunting ground is unlimited and his scope is beyond his imagination.

Are you a hunter? If you don't have the instinct of hunting in the wild concrete jungle, then selling as a career is really not suitable for you. Many young people are persuaded to join the selling world, when in fact they are not the hunting type. Remember a pet dog and a hunting dog have differences. Some hunt and some not. Be honest of yourself.

Confucius said, "Find a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life."

You can be younger with a stronger mind.

A new club member was working along with me in the gym. We became friendly and I was curious of his age, "how young are you?" He replied, "Can you guess?" Staring at him from top to bottom, I responded, "You should be at 45 now." He was amazed and surprised, my guess was so accurate.

Due to my working experiences, I used to assess my prospects age for insurance purposes. Most of the time, I look at their faces where the eyes and chins are the indicator of age. However the facial can sometimes look different but the neck and the outer part of the hands can never fail to deter the right age. Follow by the person's way of talking would also reflex his maturity of life. It takes time to master this skill of assessing age.

During our conversation, the new member asked my age as well. I smiled and said, "Would you try to guess mine." He replied, "I think you are also 45 like me." I laughed, "Ha! Ha! Ha! Thank you for that compliment, I will be turning 60 soon." He was shocked, "Unbelievable! Really? Not joking? I must get to know you more."

I could guess right of most people age but very seldom others would guess mine correctly. My biological age can be older but I used my brain to cheat my age to be younger. If one were to think old, he would be old. I might have the wisdom of an older person but I have never forgotten how I was young. My thinking is deep with understanding of life but I still keep my physical with muscle and strength. When I talk to an older person, I speak like his mind of wisdom. Whereas, when I chatted with this man of 45, I spoke with him at his level of thought and thinking. My personality, physical and communication skill had misled his guess on my age.

Moral of the story; if you want others to guess your age younger, tell your mind not to be old.

Interesting words spoken by Abraham Lincoln, "And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."

Man without love can live a miserable life

Man cannot live without woman is a fact. On exceptional cases, there are men who stay single and unmarried till late life. Through my working experiences again, I have many male friends who are still bachelors and do not have any relationship with woman. From my observation, they are the shy types or don't mix much, working too hard to have little time to court ladies when they were younger, expectation are to high or not interested in female.

Most of these bachelors are touching 50 of age and over now. From their behaviour, I could see they are lonely, unhappy, lack personal drive and not healthy in their life at the moment. Their lives are dull and uneventful because they have no love and warm in their heart. Not like the ladies who remain single without man, could still be joyful and happy till their right old age. The comparison tells me that male is actually weaker than the female. For those single males who wish to live longer, stay healthier and be happier, don't be stubborn but give yourself a chance to love another woman. Is only love that can create your magical life.

I always believe, "The most lonely place in the world is the heart, when love is absent."

Ladies..please give us another chance!

Women do not need man could be true. Especially those who are doing well in their careers. During my course of work, I have gathered many friends, male and female. Thirty years ago, I could have encountered one or two ladies who had no intention to get marry but worked independently by themselves. Today, it's shocking to know I have countless single ladies who love to be independent without settling down with a family. Those could have married before but successful in their careers later, also prefer to remain single by requesting divorce from their husbands.

It is frightening but is true. I had many chances to ask these independent career ladies why they prefer to stay single. All of them said alike, "Why should we need husband, when we could earn well and be successful ourselves." Really can't blame them because man is less aggressive and not prepared to work harder than woman. Also man is unfaithful most of the time that create the distrust on woman against man. Gentlemen, are we that bad?

I always believe, "The most lovely place in the world is the heart, when love is absent." To those ladies who are still single, can you give man another chance again?

A sickly client needs motivation.

At this moment, I have a client cum friend who is currently working in Bangkok. He is offered an honourable post in Thailand, immediately after his retirement from the Malaysian Government three years ago. Not married and soft spoken. Few days ago, he emailed to inform me that he has contracted Iympohome cancer at the third stage and would be under chemotherapy soon.

As he is a alone in a foreign country, I know he needs encouragement and motivation at this period of time. The last few days, I wrote a few mails to him which I like to share.

Dated on the 7th August:

Hi Young man,

Sorry to know about your diagnosis. Any way, in life we have to take the good and bad part of whatever come along. If we take them positively, we should appreciate life better. Many survive severe sicknesses, because they believe in faith and the challenges of living. For your information, this was confirmed by recent science that human mind has a chemical, "ENDOGENOUS OPIOIDS" which could heal sicknesses naturally. The strong belief in mind, helps to secrete this chemical to the effected part of our body. Drugs and treatments are available for you but if you do not believe in them, then this natural chemical from your brain would not be released into your immune system.

I am sure you know what is best for you. Most important, yourself must be cheerful in any circumstances. Try this...smile more often now...even to yourself alone. Smiling and laughter are the best medicine to yourself.

Dated on the 8th August:

Hi Young man,

No treatment could be effective, if the patient has no faith and believe in them. In those Pre historical day, when there was no doctor and medicine yet, the sick were healed by the faith healers only. They were only given non medical powder or water for treatment. Surprisingly they were cured from various diseases of those days. The logic was, the sick had the fullest belief with their faith healer's power. In doing so, their brains secreted the Endogenous Opioids from their own immune system. This helped to cure themselves without them realising. Today, all medical doctors are advised to be faith healers to their patients. Not just medicines and treatments, but let your patients to have strong confident in their practises.

Coming over to your side...before you accept to be treated by your attending doctors, are you totally confident with them. If you don't, the treatments may not be effective. Believe me...I had seen more patients than most people, except doctors or nurses, cause of my work as an insurance agent. I used to relate this advice to most of my clients and it worked pretty well.

His reply:

Thank you, this is a soothing message. I need more of these.

Words spoken from my associate Derick Lam, "A cheerful disposition is the medicine to our heart, mind and body."

What we know is more important than who we know

One of my lady reader wrote to me and asked this interesting question, " Is it really who we know is more important than what we know?"

I guess she is a young lady in her mid twenties, seeking all ways to reach success. I told her that what we know is more important than who we know. It is advisable to start with solid footing to learn and know more in life. Be knowledgeable first, cause knowledge builds confidence. Later when you are connected with the right people, your confidence will easily help you to move faster. Nobody would give a chance to another person who hasn't the mind. However that person who has the mind and abilities can still achieve success without the connection.

I hope my short statement could be useful to her thinking.

Spoken by Joseph Barbara, "Happiness is the real sense of fulfillment that comes from hard work."

Silent is powerful.

Silent is Golden. Not only is Golden but powerful if one knows how to use it.

I use it on my daily interacting with people, on my selling especially or just talking as a hobby. No point of talking with someone who is not listening or whether that someone is actually listening. In order to know our listener's mind or to control his attention while talking, a minute of total silent and staring at his face is a powerful mind game. You might think its illogical and senseless but great speakers use silent as a way of communication. When you are at silence, your listeners would be curious why you are not talking or if they are not concentrating with your conversation, your silent draws their attention back to you again.

If you are a person who needs to communicate with people, don't be afraid to learn the art of keeping silent. For the ladies who also want the attention of their men, perhaps silent could creates the missing link of their needs. For the gentlemen, sorry we cannot keep the silent. Otherwise no lady would come to us, if we are in silence. Remember, know when to be in silence.

Spiritual Quote; "Be silent, and I will teach you wisdom."

Dreams have to be changed.

Is good to create dream. Dream excites our life and desire. However it isn't necessary all dreams could be practical. When I was in the thirty, I wanted to have a big house with a beautiful garden plus a swimming pool. I went as far as to purchase an acre of resort home. I had a fantastic house plan drawn and approved. By my fate, before I could materialise my dream house, a close politician friend insisted that I should sell the whole package to him. The price offered was too tempting for me to resist. Today, he is the proud owner of this huge villa.

Alternatively I down-sized my dream to buy a semi detached home instead. Using the balance of profit, I sent all my children to further their studies abroad. Although my current home is only a semi d but it has a plot of garden with five big rooms. The dinning and the living rooms are equally spacious. The first ten years of my stay here was pleasant and warm. All my three children were staying with me. Our cars were parked all over the surrounding, especially during the weekend when my children friends would be around. The dinner when every one came home, the laughter and chatting were heard aloud. We had to control the music and the tv sound.

As time passed, two of my sons got married and moved out to their own homes. Today they had even half migrated, one to China and the other had left for Singapore. My last son seldom comes home because he enjoys staying over with his buddies outside. My wife loves to spend time with his children, would be hopping all over the places. Finally, I am left with this house with only the maid to accompany me. Sometimes I wonder, why I should have such a big house when nobody is around. In fact, I am toying with the idea I should be staying in an apartment rather on a landed home.

Conclusion: too big a dream might be a burden later.

This famous happiness quote by Bette Davis is right, "You will never be happier than you expect. To change your happiness, change your expectation."

Young and older have different roles to play to be successful

As I looked back my 40 years of working life, I could see and understand the different of my past and present. Perhaps some of my following words and sharing can be useful.

When I was very much younger, I have to admit that I certainly could not think like today. My knowledge was still relatively weak and shallow. My strongest point of me then, I was willing to work, responsible and full of enthusiasm and personal drive. I worked without complaint but rather offered faithfulness, honesty and sincerity in all my doing. Out of my integrity and hard work, many people soon gave me a chance to deal business with them.

Gradually when I turned mid way into my career, my knowledge had expanded which reflected my professionalism. My ethic and principle in life and work, established my solid trust and respect from my clients. My work was easier without much persuasion and I began to love my career even more. I prospected less when clients kept recommending friends to me. In fact, they were not just clients but more of good friends and associates whom we had developed.

Today, I have found a new hobby. My hobby is talking and my career as a life insurance agent, allows me to have a license to speak to any one I like. I have refined my years of knowledge with wisdom. My clients don't like to listen on insurance but they prefer to learn the art of living. My present work no longer is a chore but rather is a joy to be working. In order to stay at peak, I maintain to be healthy and cheerful. Thanks to the Almighty Universe! My biological age could be much older but my real felt heart age last year was 38 and turning 37 this year. I believe if I keep focusing my mental thought of feeling younger, I should be still young when I reach 70 and over. The logic is, if you are old with a knowledgeable and wisdom mind, and have a youthful body and health, your words carry weight wherever you go. An older person could be weak and ill in health but if he is strong and cheerful, you rest assure he has a lot to offer in life. You consider him to be a diamond then!

Paul from The Netherlands said, "Happiness is the ultimate realization that everything was, and is, exactly as it should be."

Work with love and the effect is better.

Mother's foods are always the best. They are cooked with plenty of love added. Mother knows what are the tastes for the young and old, for the children and for the father. She spend time and effort to make the ideal meals for her loved one. As long as they enjoy her foods, all mothers will willingly continue to serve endlessly for the families.

If only we could use the same type of motherly love and interest to apply on our work, then all jobs and responsibilities would be perfectly done and be joyfully completed. Most people fail in their tasks or assignments is because they have not given enough attention and heart over them. Any thing that we do with love, the end results are always better.

Quoted by Vince Lombardi, "The quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence regardless of their chosen field of endeavor."

Touching can be sensational too.

Voice is important but we should not forget touches. Although most animals cannot be so flexible in physical movement than human being, they still have close contact with each other. The dogs and cats lick between their male and female. Whenever the male cat is licked against over his neck by his mate, we could see the soothing expression on his face. He looks calm and contented.

Again when we were at courting stage, we love to be holding hands, hugging, kissing, patting and fondling. However as time passed, we took for granted and we tend to touch lesser than before or even totally forgotten the need of touching between man and woman. In fact, I strongly believe man needs more of female touches which can create and stimulate exciting feeling. The excitement turns into another form of energy which leads to calmness and contentment of mind over body.

For those men who lack female touches and voices, they are prepared to pay for a price from women who work professionally to serve them. Those social female escorts who work at the karaoke centres or nightclubs are professional touch and voice givers to their male customers. Each time when they meet customers who patronise their places, they are willing to call the unknown strangers as "Honeey! or Darlinnng!" in a very sensational tune. A little longer, they can offer intimate patting, hugging and kissing. Although these are unnatural romances but the hungry males are still quite happy towards these artificial touches and sounding.

As all human being need the sense of touch and voice to enhance our positive feeling and thoughts, we should try to be more romantic and loving to our mates or lovers. Don't just call by his or her name. Rather call him or her as my dear, darling or honey. Don't take each other for granted, hold hands as often as possible, rub her and squeeze him, pat whenever you can, hug tightly, fondle until others envy you both and kiss without the shyness. If you could do it, miracle would happen, cause this is the magic of 'voice and touch' created as part of life. You have done it before and you can do it again.

Meaningful quote; "Let's define happiness as a feeling of contentment created when all of one's physical, emotional, psychological, intellectual and spiritual needs have been gratified." Try touching and the voice.

Voice is sensational to the ears.

Voice or sound is important factor in our life. Voice can excite and stimulate mind. Even animals know how to draw attention from their own sounding. When a female cat needs to arouse all the male cats, she meows to the right pitch. Not just meow nor meoooow but rather a sensational 'meooooooooooow! meooooooooooow! meooooooooooooooooooow! All male cats be thrilled by that meow of wander.

If the animal kingdom knows how to create their excitement from voice and sound, the more the human race needs them as well. However is sad that we have slowly loss touch of what we should do to appease each others. How often would our spouses or lovers excite us with their voices. Perhaps when we were courting at the beginning, these addresses were often called, "My dear, honey, darling, sweetie, my love, sayang, yang or chinta." As the relationships drifted further, the romantic voices and sounding gradually diminishes. Is a sad thing really! We love to hear these fantastic addresses and yet we are reluctant to give.

How I wish my love, wife or my girl friends can address me as, "Honeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey I "missssssss you a lot." Those simple few words will thrill me to the top of the world. If you don't believe me, why not try to say this to your love now, "Sayaaaaaaaannny I rinduuuuuuu you!" I bet with you! You would not regret it for the rest of your life.

Spoken by Mark Twain, "Whoever is happy will make others happy, too."

Not telling the truth is a way of life

In the English version, telling 'The Truth is the best policy' but in Chinese, there is another saying, 'Too Truthful in life turns one to be a beggar'.

No new properties can be sold with telling the truth. For any new housing projects being launched, sellers always claimed that not many units are still available. At their site offices, most of the units are marked as sold, when they are not. The intention is to create a sense of high false demand which can excite interested buyers. Not telling the truth helps to sell faster.

You might be calling a professional for arranging an appointment to seek his advices and services. Perhaps he can be free on that day but he prefers to inform you that he is busy for the next few days. You would be too happy to see him next week or so because you feel that he is a successful professional due to his tight schedules. Not telling the truth helps him to be wanted.

Your girlfriend calls you at the wrong time of the night when your wife is still awake. She asks, "darling! who is that?" You reply, "that was a wrong number from a stupid guy." Not telling the truth saves your life. These are all facts of life we have to face.

Meaningful quote; "Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not." Spoken by Oprah Winfrey

Honesty might not be the best policy.

Not all the time efficiency, knowledge and honesty are practical in life. In the Western World, perhaps it works but with Asian it's not acceptable most of the time.

In the USA, if a motorist has a problem with his car which rattles while driving, he would be too happy to pay a mechanic who can detect and repair his car sooner. The cause can be a little nut that loosen, which can easily be tightened but the motorist will be too happy to pay, even with a higher charges. Because he appreciates the mechanic efficiency, knowledge and honesty on his work. By doing so, the mechanic solves his problem faster and motorist has more time for other productive tasks.

However over in Malaysia, the same scenarios could be different. Motorist sent his car to the workshop where mechanic located the loosen nut too. Instead of telling the truth, he said, "Oh! Big problem! It would take a while for us to check. Please come back later of the day and we would try our best." The minute the motorist left, the nut was tightened. Later of the day when he returned, mechanic smilingly claimed, "Friend, it was a big big problem but we manage to solve all the necessary now. For the heavy repair, it is only RM100 charges." The car owner paid happily without question cause he appreciated, the inefficiency, knowledge and no honesty principle of our kind. If you don't believe me, ask yourself, "Am I like that?"

Conclusion; "Honesty might not be the best policy at times."