A birthday gift on phone.

Today is Bee Lang's birthday. I never failed to call all my friends on their birthdays. As birthday is always the sweetest day for everyone. Isn't it? The following was the chat I had with her on my mobile phone.

Me: "Happy birthday to you my dear, Bee Lang. How are you? You want me to sing you the happy birthday song on phone?"

Lang: "Robert, you never failed to call on my birthday. U do make me happy. At least you call once a year to wish me. Even my husband forgets at times, but definitely not you. You really put him into shame."

Me: "Bee Lang, I might not call you often but the birthday call is a checking call. I want to know how you are, your family and your business."

Lang: "I am okay."

Me: "Are you having a party today?"

Lang: "No! Those were the days we had parties. Not now any more."

Me: "Is your darling husband taking you for a candle light dinner today?"

Lang: "He is not as romantic as you. I wish he is."

Me: "Bee lang, you don't sound very happy! Tell me are you happy?"

Lang:"Yesss! Happppy!"

Me: "Though I can't see u. But your voice on phone sounds dull. I think you are only 60% happy. Are you facing some problems?"

Lang: "Ahhh!! A little!!"

Me: "I am sorry to hear that on your birthday. May be if you try to be happy, you would feel better."

Lang: "How could it be Robert? When I have problems, I will not be happy."

Me: "True! Since today is your birthday, I want to give you a birthday gift on the phone. You want it?"

Lang: "A gift on the phone. How?"

Me: "Yes! My gift is a few words of life. It goes to say. 'A happy heart will see a beautiful world'. Meaning. You will never see a beautiful world if your heart is sad and sorrowful. You might have a problem now. You have a choice to solve it with a happy heart or an unhappy heart. If you think of all the good things you have at the moment, I am sure you will be happy. Use the happy feeling and solve your problem at the sametime. I am sure you will get a better result. However if you choose to feel unhappy of heart, and at the sametime you try to solve your immediate problem, most likely you may not solve it at all. Understand?

Lang: "It sounds logical."

Me: "In short, solve all problems with a happy heart. In turn you will have fun and laughter over them. After all, life has got to be interesting. No matter what happen, see the happy and positive part of it."

Lang: "Thank you Robert. I am glad you called and you have given me a lovely gift of lives."

Food for the thought. "Act happy, feel happy, be happy, without a reason in the world. Then you can love, and do what you will" - Dan Millman

Why my dad isn't a happy man?

Was having a chat with a sweet young thing (SYT) lately. She was complaining, her father was getting irritated easily, hot temper and arrogance most of the time. The only person who is staying with him now is the mother who has to tolerate his nuisance. She thought the father is getting old. Out of curiosity I asked SYT, "How old are your dad and mum?" She said her father is 66 and the mother is 64. I checked with SYT again, "Before you claim your dad is old. May I know your dad is healthy and strong?"

SYT said her dad is healthy. He still goes along with the wife to play tai' chii' almost everyday with friends. The couple walked a lot at the park. His appetite is good as the wife knows how to cook well. He is extremely strong and he helped to provide handy work for his own and children houses.

I told SYT, "Ahhha!!! your dad isn't old. He is hungry?" SYT was puzzled. I continued, "A hungry person is an angry person. Your dad is suffering from silent sorrow syndrome."

Although the man is 66, as he is still fit, he needs sex to fulfill his physical satisfaction as a strong and healthy person. No normal healthy man can abstain from sex. The more he suppresses his urge, the more frustrated the man would be. To the children, the mother and father could be a happy couple from the outside, but I guessed, inside the curtain the man faces sorrow and depression. As woman could live without man or even discard sex as they aged, not man immaterial of what age we are. The wife could care for him but might neglect to satisfy him sexually. He is a hungry man and a hungry man is always an angry man. This is man's problem, "Silent Sorrow."

My friendly advice to SYT. You might not be able to understand your parents and not easy to discuss such matters with your mother or dad, but you could suggest them to read this blog. The only person who could assist the man is the woman. As I had written earlier in my previous title, woman has 99 things to be contented in lives but man only needs one to be contented. Is Sex! Ideally to have it with the one he loves. Otherwise the hungry man could really age faster as expected without sex. For the females, if you happened to see an angry and frustrated man, please be careful, because he isn't a satisfied person.

Food for the heart. "Love & sex is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible, it cannot be seen or measured, yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment, and offer you more joy than any material possession could" - Barbara DeAngalis.

The 84 years old bride.

Please click the above picture to enlarge the wordings for easy reading.

Well! Are you too old to fall in love again? Not the above lady. I consider her as brave and loving. Many could have laughed at her but without realising it yourself, you should be laughing at yourself for being too timid. After all everyone needs to be loved, whether young or old. Those who have no love in heart, are always dull at look. Not when you have love. Look at her eyes and you should see how sweet she is, even though she has reached 84. Many of her age would have lost the jest of lives. Love has brought her hope and strength. It creates excitement and the desire to live. I will be like her to always be in love, no matter what age I am. I hope this will offer encouragement to my little darling to love me much more.

Food for the heart. "None of us has the power to make someone else love us. But we all have the power to give away love to love other people. And if we do, we change the kind of person we are, and we change the kind of world we live in" - Rabbi Harold Kushner.

These two great ladies are my daughters in law.

These are the two great ladies I admire, Debbie and Fionne. Debbie was married to Fionne husband. Although Debbie was the ex wife, she gets along well with Fionne. She treats her ex as her best friend and has never got jealous with Fionne. She knows, the man could not be her husband but at least be a friend. She even taught Fionne how to love her husband better. Though she had mistakes before, she doesn't want the new couple to make the same mistakes again. Fionne is equally smart, she knows how to understand Debbie. She is prepared to learn and to take advice from the elder friend. From the first wife, the man has a son who is currently staying with the father. The first 10 years, the boy was cared by the mother. It is time, the father has to be responsible to the son now. Allowing the mother to be free, when she could concentrate on her demanding career internationally. Fionne has a big heart and willing to take the role of the mother to this son. Not forgetting she is expecting soon. She promised to Debbie she will be a good mother and a friend to her son. These two wonderful ladies are intelligent and attractive as well.

The man who had fallen once with Debbie and now the responsible husband to Fionne is certainly a lucky man. I wonder where he has the charm to sweet talk these two great women. This man is no other than my first son who is currently staying abroad. Although Debbie was his wife, she will always be my special daughter in law who is so understanding in lives. At the same time, I am equally joyful to have another caring daughter in law, Fionne who could make things happen for my son. Knowing her now, I am sure she will be the ideal lady for my playful son.

There is a saying, "If you harbour doubts about others, there is no way you can love others, forgive others, or believe in others. " Thanking you Debbie and welcome Fionne to our family.

My girlfriend is pregnant.

In the course of my work, I encountered this situation lately. Hong is a young college student who is only 18. His parents are my clients but just that a couple of years back, his dad divorced his mum for another woman. Although Hong stays with his mother, she comes home late because she too has to work. The father would come back once in awhile to see his son. Hong was happy until recently when he called to seek my advice. He is in love with another college mate for quite sometimes. Unexpectedly his girl friend is pregnant for three months. They are very worried, tense and do not know what to do. Both families are unaware of this relationship. They claimed their parents would be angry and upset, if they were to be told. Currently both have very little saving to solve the unexpected. As Hong has known me since baby, he felt that I am the one person who could advise and assist. He rather wants me to know than to inform his fearful dad.

Mmmmmm!!! It is not an easy task for me. I thought as a life insurance agent, I need to sell only insurance but today I have to act as parent to these lost children. They might have made a mistake but the mistake could not have happened if the parents took time to educate their children. After all, who can control temptation? Even adults like us can't at times. What more for the young and innocent like Hong and his girl friend. I am still scratching my head, what to tell them!!!

Shall I suggest to them to abort the unexpected, when nobody would know of it at the moment. Of course there is a certain element of risk involved if they choose this option. Or shall I inform both their families who might not understand them. Or shall I encourage both to get marry at this tender age when they should be studying. Or shall I stay quiet and do nothing, when they have so much confidence in me. Perhaps you readers can help.

Shall I follow this proverb spoken by Bill Watterson; "Letting your mind play is the best way to solve problems."

Ninety nine against one!

Is late night and I still can't sleep. I am alone thinking of my little darling who is on holiday. The day seemed to be the longest day in my life. Second clicked like hour and time is motionless. My body has no energy and lacking in vibration. My creativeness all of a sudden disappeared. Didn't know missing of a loved one could be so torturing. Has to admit man always needs woman. From the time, a boy is born, he needs the care of his mother. When he turns adult, he needs the love of his wife. Until he dies, he still needs a female nurse to care for his dying.

I have to take the advice from a very religious man. He said, in the spiritual contents, it was written, man has only one thing to be satisfied. Whereas woman has ninety nine things to look forward to in this world. Woman is lucky, they have been created to be contented with many things. Just to mention a few, they love holidays, jewelries, clothing, make-up, properties, cars, parents and their children. They can easily be happy with the surrounding and they are materialistic in nature. Out of their ninety nine needs, man is only classified as one of their need. Comparing to male, our one need as top priority is woman. Without the company of his loved lady, the rest of the world isn't important to him. He might like to go for holiday too, but without his love, the holiday is of no purposes for him. He could be having a big villa, without his love, the villa isn't a home for him either. Whether you like it or not, this is the way of lives the world is being made.

A friendly advice to the gentlemen, if you do have a love at the moment, please treasure her as a diamond. Because without her, your lives will be dull and boring like me now. I have only one little darling's thought to be contented but she has ninety nine desiring thoughts to look forward to everyday. When she comes home, I have to treat her like a diamond too.

Food for the heart. "Love is a lot like dancing - you just surrender to the music. I surrender to her."

Identifying & Qualifying prospects first.

Identifying and qualifying prospects in our business are vital important. Failure to do so, will cause a lot of frustration and dissatisfaction. Today one of my associate agent, felt extremely upset over a client. Two years ago, out of hunger in gathering business, she sold a new client a life insurance policy with full discount given. According to her, without the rebate, the client would not pick up the plan. Although she wasn't earning from this sale, her client insisted high expectation from her. During this last two years, this particular client demanded attention and services. If for some reasons, she could not answer his calls for being busy, he would harass her until she responded. To make thing worst, the client met an accident, when he lost one of his ear hearing. The pitiful agent tried her level best to submit his accidental partial disable claim, which wasn't appreciated. He insisted the insurance company, staffs and agent to act immediately. Not only he scolded this stressful agent, he yelled at those who received his telephone calls and had intention to write official complaints for delaying his payment.

I considered this client as most unreasonable and selfish. He wasn't prepared to pay for services as he insisted on full rebate, but at the same time he wanted full professional attention. How could our economical world survives, when everyone takes and no one pays. When you ask for a discount, you might expect a discounted services.

Thanks God! Although my associate agent had made a big blunder by giving her earning away, she still had not back out. Stressful though, she managed to get the cheque claim for this unreasonable client. I am sure she had learned a good lesson. Identifying and qualifying a prospect is important. If you don't feel comfortable and easy with a prospect, don't deal business with him. A good client is one who respects and willing to pay an agent to serve. Similarly a professional agent is one who sells with dignity and sincerity. The minute you give away your earning, you loose the respect from your prospective client. I hope all my fellow colleagues in this industry would learn.

Specially to this associate agent who almost cried when the above happened. Food for thought; "To think is easy. To act is hard. But the hardest thing in the world is to act in accordance with your thinking" - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe.