Be faithful to the one you truly love.

A reader posted in my comment..."May i ask you an interesting question ?If you meet a lady who is sexier, prettier,more beautiful,more attractive and has a kinder heart than your little darling, will you fall 4 her ? ha...ha !"

I wonder who this reader is! Is a she or a he? Nevertheless i like to take this opportunity to reply this supportive reader. First i believe no two persons could be the same and nobody on earth is perfect and there is no comparison of either parties. Even twins could have different characters and personality. The person who claims he/she is perfect is a great liar. Comparison leads to frustration and discontentment.

My answer to the above interesting question is a positive NO!! That lady could be more sexier, prettier, more beautiful, more attractive and has a kinder heart....she is still not my little darling. Love won't just appear by the first sight. In fact, i don't believe at first sight in love. Sighting this fantastic lady is exciting but i could only admire and appreciate her attractiveness and beauty of her heart. To love a person, one has to take the patience to listen and to understand the inner beauty. To nurture a love relationship, both have to put effort to romance with each other. We are not just lovers, but also she is my best friend, buddy, darling, sweetheart and soul mate. It took us a long time to understand the compatibility and compassion in us. She makes me laugh whenever i am sad. She creates fun to make my life more exciting. She has the patience ears to listen to my endless stories. She will be there when i face any problems. She encourages me when I am down. She is a very wild intimate "tong tong cheang" partner who is not shy to 'yok' (disturb) my desire. She is not replaceable coz I truly love her dearly. It is by fate with the miracle of love, we met...thank you for your offer. I have to say no again to your question.

To promote growth - "A tree uses what comes its way to nurture itself. . . . Absorb, absorb, absorb. That is the secret of the tree. — Deng Ming-Dao, Taoist master & author of several books aboutTa. I think loving a person is the same.

Is she beautiful, pretty or attractive?

Are you beautiful or should it be pretty or attractive? They sound alike but when should we apply them! On checking the dictionary, all three words have quite similar meaning. In adjective term, it is...Having qualities that delight the eye or pleasing to the eye or mind.

From an intelligent lady, she said, beautiful comes with gracefulness, soft, enjoy and admire, looking deeper into the heart. Pretty can be just one glance at first sight only, with sexiness and fast admiration. Attractive is the energy and elegant of the woman. Mmmmm!! the words from her.

A young man of thirty described differently to me. According to him beautiful, pretty and attractive are the same, but it depends on one's mood and circumstances to say them. When and where to apply are more relevance. Is he right?

Since all females like to be admired, knowing how to offer these three qualities as compliment is beneficiary. With some insight of the woman's world, I think attractiveness is more of the outside beauty of a lady. She dresses to be attractive and be admired. A woman might not be attractive externally, but she could still be beautiful with a kind heart. It's never spoken as attractive heart. Rather as a beautiful heart. Pretty is natural and graceful, without even any cosmetic touch up.

One typical example. My little darling is an intelligent lady who dresses very attractively every morning. Her attractiveness draws attention from admirers because it has sexiness and charm. Her hairdo, facial cosmetic, clothing with matching colour and style, fashionable handbag, diamond rings on both hand and elegant high heal shoes, make her attractive. I am lucky and proud to see her attractive in this sense. However I love her more with her beautiful self as she truly has a sincere and kind heart for everyone. If I happen to see her on bed, her pretty look with just light clothing would naturally excite me to the extreme. She is attractive during all working days but when she is with me I think she is beautiful. Given a chance, I prefer to see her in the evening coz she looks more pretty then.

These are my personal views and I am still learning. Would appreciate, if there are some understanding readers who can enlighten me by providing some comments.

I like this phrase - "Beauty. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband." - Ambrose Bierce

Don't worry be happy.

This can happen to anyone....

It was a lovely morning for my little darling. She slept well last nite coz I gave her all the kisses and hugs when I left her home. Before I could wake up, she sent this sweet message to my hand phone for me to read. It was written..."Is indeed another beautiful day coz knowing my sweet sweetheart is with me and I am blessed with all his love, care, support and protection... YippppYYYYayayaYa....:)"

The text showed she was happy and was looking forward for the day. I felt good for her. The next few minutes I received another shorter message from her again. She wrote, "I am upset and fed up with the housing loan..Just let London knows, if there is no news, pls do not call any more." London was the bank agent who arranged her bank funding. He had taken several months and still hadn't got the loan finalised. The lawyer who represented them was not efficient. Immediately I replied her..."Darling, pls relax. Don't let them anger and disturb your beautiful day."

Although she woke up with a bright and romantic feeling, a phone call with an unpleasant conversation changed her temperament which spoiled her entire day. Though I gave her an afternoon call later, she wasn't prepared to talk. I am sure, she had a moody and depressing day too. Working under such unhappy emotion, might not be fruitful and productive. One could get tired very fast.

Starting the day with a smiling morning is important. Positive energy is required to last the day or week. Letting a negative thought to sink into our mind, could be detrimental in our work. I will avoid at all cost for talking to the wrongful parties...especially in the morning. The simplest way is to call people who are pleasant and nice. Start with the easy one first and drop off those who are a nuisance or troublemakers.

I always carry this name card with me...Seven rules to be happy. 1. Never hate. 2.Don't worry. 3.Live simple. 4.Expect a little. 5.Give a lot. 6 Always smile. 7. Have friends like Robert Foo.

I wish all those little darlings out there to keep my Seven Rules and you be happy all the time.

Best investment during difficult time is humour.

I had a chance to attend a recent Toastmasters' meeting around town. We had an impromptu session, when various topics were given to 10 selected members to talk for two minutes. The most humorous non prepared title was spoken by a young lady who really made everyone laugh for the evening.

The subject was, "What is the best investment during this difficult period of time." She didn't even have to think. Immediately she spoke with confidence...."The best investment during difficult time is to invest in humour!" We were caught in amazement by this word 'humour!' Why humour? According to this interesting lady, she said, why be sad and be unhappy during this difficult financial periods. In life, there are good and bad time, which we have to live along with them. No point of being worried and be frustrated over this economical down turn. Instead have fun, gather some cheap parties at home if you can't make the expensive one. Dance and swing along with music and laughter. The humour you create strengthen your mind and body. So! When the market recover eventually, you should be strong enough to get what you want later.

It might be a joke but I think she was right in some ways. Why worry! Be happy and things might turn better if we are still strong and healthy. However as far as I am concerned, "The best investment is an investment that pays when it's needed most" Life insurance is an investment which will pay when a person is dead or criticall ill. These are the time when money is needed most. Whether is good or bad time, always consider to invest on some important life insurance. Buy it when you don't need it coz when you need it, you can't buy.... this is life insurance.

Some advice - "The best insurance policy for tomorrow is to make the most productive use of today" — Geoffrey Norman

Praise & flattery sell.

It was a Sunday morning at the market with my little darling. There was this simple food store selling wanton noodle which captured my attention. It was packed with many customers waiting to be served by two elderly couple. I believed they were husband and wife at worked. Their roaring business tells me that the food must be good. As I love eating wanton noodle, I joined in the crowd as well. While waiting my turn to be served, I noticed the noodle store owner though busy boiling and cooking the noodle, he was greeting and flattering his customers who were nearer to him. Each time he saw a female, whether was young or old, he would praise them as "leng looi." Leng Looi in Chinese is pretty woman. I could see the auntie was smiling and her eyes were sparkling with joy. Perhaps it was a long time, since such compliment was given to her. Another fat young simple girl was holding her breath when "leng looi" was thrown to her. She could not believe she was beautiful!! I know why the food store was selling so well, even the wanton noodle that I ate wasn't so fantastic. He added the spices "leng looi" which sold the food. Food could be tasty but words are more pleasant to hear.

Although this typical Chinese man who only knows how to sell wanton noodle, he has a sweet mouth to offer his customers too. Without him realising, I was enjoying his food and admiring his talent and skills. Before I left, I walked over to him to express my regards. "Hey! Boss, give me a second?" He was surprised. "Your place has many leng looi. But of all the many leng looi, you never address my little darling here. I think she is the prettiest leng looi of all. I would be happy, if you can also call my little darling leng looi too." The man and his wife were caught unguarded with my joke. Without further ado, he yelled aloud to the direction of my little darling..."Hey there!! You are truly a leng looi and you are lucky to have a handsome man here." Everybody was laughing, except my little darling was blushed but I knew she was happy and proud.

This experience taught me, you don't need to be a scholar or a genius to sell but rather a sweet mouth and a sincere heart to make another person melts. A happy heart see a happy world!

This cannot be wrong - "Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones." - Bible

Integrity is the key to successful selling.

Good tips...

Never ask a fruit seller whether his fruits are sweet. He will definitely say "Yes!" Neither should you ask a restaurant whether he serves tasty food coz his reply is "Yes!!" again.

All sales and services are always presented as their best of quality in marketing. Can't blame the advertisers, otherwise sales might not move. In my many years of selling, I believe a professional salesperson should have integrity and principle in his business dealing. He should tell the pros & cons in his products. I am sure nobody is perfect. He should be honest to divulge what he can and can't do. Nothing is permanent, he shall not make promises when he can't guarantee. In short, no empty promises. Most of all, he should try not to over sell himself.

One can take a customer for a ride once, but you cant' cheat all the time. Especially when you are dealing with the intellectual class of society, they know what they buy and whom they are dealing with. My clients are happy to deal with me because I always tune down my selling. I will never claim my company is the best, neither will I degrade my competitors. All life insurances are the same coz they are written by the same school of artuary. The only logic is, the more you paid the more you get. My strength is my knowledge and wisdom. Whereas my defect is my age against my younger clients. I am very serious with my business but please bear along with my naugthiness. I don't make promises but I promise to do my level best. I can't offer much but I have sincerity, honesty, patience, kindness and plenty of humour to make you laugh. So! If you happen to see another salesperson like Robert Foo.... that is the man you should deal business with.

Food for the thought - "Integrity is what we do, what we say, and what we say we do." - Don Galer

How tactful are you?

I was not having a personal driver since early this year. During these period of time, I gave myself the opportunity to drive again. To drive as fast as I like and to move wherever I wanted. Ideally I could play and act mischievously without a second person knowing. Not now anymore because I managed to employ a new young driver. Perhaps I missed my playful fun, now that a driver is besides me most of the time.

He is only twenty one of age, innocent but eager to learn. I told myself, I have to treat him like my son, groom and teach him to be a smart growing adult. Whenever I had lunch or tea with my friends, I always tried to invite this driver to eat together with us. I introduced him to my friends as he is my hero and never as a driver. Letting him feels proud to work for me. As a hero, he takes care of my live while on the road. Indirectly my live is at his hand and I considered him as a very important person to me.

Just two days ago, over breakfast together with two elderly ladies, I asked my hero this question..."Hero! Which two lady friends here is more beautiful?" The women were excited, anxious and wanting to have an answer from him. However Hero was shy and timid to say much. He shooked his head and said, "Sorry lah! I don't know what to tell." In order to save his emotion, I took over that question..."Hero! These two darlings here are both pretty, attractive and intelligence. Otherwise they would not be here with me." All of us were laughing and smiling over the food. I was sure, my two friends were not offended in anyway. Later inside the car, I explained to Hero why I threw him that question. My main purpose was to see how capable he was to encounter such situation. Luckily he did not give compliment to one lady as beautiful. By doing so, he could have offended the second woman. It was safe for him not to commit with a comment but neither was it an intelligence reply. He agreed my compliment was wonderful and nice. Equally I was happy for I had made two ladies happy with this outing and educating another younger man to understand life better.

Appreciative words are effective and how to apply them is even more important. It might take a bit of time and effort to master the useage and application of words, but certainly they will make us a more likable, lovable and a tactful person. I apply them in business to be successful and I use them in romance to be successful on love too.

Food for the thought - "Tact is the ability to stay in the middle without getting caught there" - Franklin P. Jones

What is a successful man?

There are many definition of a successful man. Some would have said, when I become millionaires, or when my business turns billion or for my fellow life insurance agents, making to the Premium Club is considered as successful. Of all, I personally like this..."A successful man is the one who makes more money than his wife or girlfriend can spend." Not only has he got money, he should not feel the pinch or pain whenever his woman spends. He should feel great that he is capable to let her spends. Seeing his loved one being pampered by him, should be a joy and achievement. The car that she drives which is paid by him is a pride in his heart. The six karats diamond ring she wears flashes his glory. The attractive dresses he chooses for her, make him proud and honour.

Although I am still not a millionaire yet, I am trying to appease my little darling in all ways I could. Do you want to know what is a successful woman? Yes! A successful woman is one who can find such a man like I mentioned above. To my lady readers... have you found such a man?

And to the man, please take note - "Whatever you give a woman, she's going to multiply. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So! If you give her crap, you'll get a bucket full of shit." This phrase was shared by Fionne Chan.

What is love?

If a husband hugs n kisses u before he leaves the house,but the next moment when he comes across something unpleasant outside the house n shouts back at u,is that love ? or do u still looking forwards to his hugs n kisses ?
October 22, 2008 7:23 PM

The above question was commented and asked by one reader. Mmmmmm! Sounds tricky here! Let me have a short to it. To me love is beautiful. Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always hopes, always perseveres. LOVE never fails.

This is how I personally look at it. The husband could be at wrong. A loving person should not be rude and easily angered. Similarly the wife who loves her husband, should have patient and keeps no record of wrongs on him. After all, no person on earth is perfect. I claimed to understand much on love but I still made mistakes. Last nite I was angry when my little darling rejected me for another friend's call. I should not be angry and hopefully she should be more thoughtful and kinder to me in future. Whatever the argument, we should not delight in evil thoughts but rejoices with the truth.

As long as we follow the definition of love, attempt to understand and practise them, hopes will perseveres. Love never fails because it has the magic to light up our lives. I hope that particular reader who asked, is satisfied with my simple explanation. Yes! Certainly you should look forwards to his hugs and kisses again. I pray my little darling would still hug and kiss me too.

Food for the thought - "Love is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible -- it cannot be seen or measured, yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment, and offer you more joy than any material possession could." - Barbara De Angelis

Ugliness against beauty.

Opposite of beauty is ugly.We seek for beauty but I think we love ugly more. A man might be attracted to the beauty of a woman and a lady could also be delighted with a handsome gentleman. However both man and woman would never be satisfied, if they are strictly forbidden to see their inner mystery. The day when Eve ate the restricted apple, human being has to be clothed to cover their innocent and emotion. With the modernization of our world, man and woman of today are more fashionable. They look beautiful in all ways from top to bottom. A lot of money has to be spent to upkeep and maintain the outside beauty. Is this what we really like to see? Is a yes and could be a no. Deep in our mind, we wonder what the cover of the inside features are like! Are they as beautiful as the face with sparkling eyes, sharp nose and a sweet lip? The minute we unclothe ourselves, what we could show are only bushy, unshaven, uncut and untamed bottom private hair. I think they look ugly down there. Comparing the face which is smooth and well care all the time. Nevertheless, all of us get excited when we see the ugly part of us here. To think about it, we might not be able to live without this ugliness which gives joy and pleasure of life. Perhaps beauty has to live along with ugliness. Whether you like it or not, there is bad and good out of life.

Food for the thought - "Ugliness is in a way superior to beauty because it lasts." - Serge Gainsbourg

Age can be deceiving.

Senior citizens are always given some special privileges. Though my heart is relatively young, my biological age allows me to benefit special entitlements. Especially walking into a busy banking hall. Others have to queue for the banking numbers and to be served later. Senior citizens above 55 or pregnant women have special fast lanes.

Yesterday I was in this Public Bank, when I needed to do some urgent banking matters. As usual the bank was packed with many customers. Without waiting, I went straight to the fast lane, meant for the VIP like me. All eyes were at me and I was wondering why! Their faces tell they were unhappy because they thought I had jumped the queue. One lady, I guessed could be at early 50, came over to me. She yelled, "Hey! Young man don't you have manner? Is shame on you! You should take the number and wait behind us." I was taken aback by her statement. I didn't know, whether I should be angry or should be happy. Politely I replied the furious woman, "Yes! My dear, you are actually speaking to an older uncle. You should be more respectful to me. Because I am a gentleman of sixty one today." Without hesitation I took out my identification card to confirm my date of birth. She was stunned and speechless for a moment. Shamefully she apologised and returned to her seating.

I was giggling in my heart because my look had deceived the onlookers. My little darling had changed my entire personality. She had dyed my hair from grey to brownish black. She had encouraged me to dress with daring colours which the older foes dislike. She has given me love which touches my heart to feel young again. A loving heart brings joy and happiness. And when my heart is happy, the grow of myself will definitely be younger in look. No wonder that younger lady thought I was younger than her...."Ha! Ha! Ha!" Thank you little darling.

My belief - "The heart that loves is always young."

Be more expressive in love.

I personally think most Asian are unromantic and less expressive in love. Disregard the young one, but when mix around those who are thirty and above of age, they are conservative and shy in romance. Just give you one typical example. Mrs Yee who was married for twenty years with her husband, claimed her marriage is a happy one. Their love is within the heart, which is non expressive in words. The three sweet words, "I Love You" was never spoken before. There is no hug and kisses, except in bed with light switched off at nite. She used to call her husband by "hey! hey!" but lately has changed to follow the children by addressing him as "father" and he calls her as "mother". Just imagine she isn't fifty and yet behaves as much older. I asked her whether she loves the man and she said yes. However she prefers to keep her love feeling inside, rather than showing outwardly to the man she loves so much. She believes her love should be felt by the husband.

Not me! The five senses of human being are important factors in lives. In order for me to show my love to my little darling, I offer her the SIGHT of action to confess my feeling for her. I wrote to her endlessly these three words, "I love you" in every opportunity. I speak aloud without fear openly...."Little darling, I miss you and I need you". I am sure she has a good ear to HEAR and to listen with appreciation. I send her flowers to let her SMELLS with desire of excitement. Whenever I have the opportunity I kiss her to let her TASTE my sweetness for her. If she is near me, I will never fail to hug her with the TOUCH of need. Yes! These five senses; sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch help to create the grow of love stronger. Is so sad, the Asian here do not know how to make use of them to make love more pleasant and loving.

Food for the heart -"Do you want to know a good way to fall in love? Just associate with all your pleasant experiences with someone, and disassociate from all the unpleasant ones." - Richard Bandler

Finally I got marry.

Richard is an old childhood friend. Yesterday I attended, his second and last daughter's wedding. The dinner was held in a six stars hotel over at the Chinese restaurant. The presentation was magnificently decorated with a powerful point showing how the two families grew. The bride was beautifully dressed and the groom was handsome. There were laughter and cheers of old friends meeting one another here.

Mid way during the dinner, both families of the bride and groom were at the platform to offer the wedding toast to the guests. As usual, our Chinese would toast by three significant 'yam sengs' as a cultural respect to all who attended the dinner. I could see my good friend, Richard and his wife, Shirley were excited over the loud cheers from the hundred of guests, relatives and families. Deep in my heart, I knew the happiest man at that moment, should be no other than Richard himself. His eyes and facial tell! He could be pondering over time, when he himself got marry thirty over years ago with Shirley. They worked hard together and raised their two pretty angels. There were sorrow and joy along the way. It wasn't easy coz I had seen them suffering when things were bad at time. They planned well and managed to send both their daughters to study abroad. Finally, in a wick of time the children had grown, turned adults and to marry now. He was definitely proud of his success and achievement. Equally I felt nice for him.

Looking at the bride and groom, I could see they got marry for the sake of showing and obliging their parents. Not like before, when couples married for the purpose of bonding together. No couples were allowed to be in close contact, until the wedding bells were rung. Before, sex came later after marriage. Whereas today, sex first and marriage later or don't come at all. It looks funny but certainly time has changed our way of life. The wedding dinner was just to appease the parents more than their children who were getting married.

Food for the thought -"The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It's a choice you make -- not just on your wedding day, but over and over again -- and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife." - Barbara De Angelis

Time for business & romance

Making appointment is a way of life in this corporate world. Nobody feels comfortable if an appointment is not prefixed in advance. Most dentists and medical doctors fix appointments for their patients. No lawyer could see you, if appointment wasn't made with their assistant. A professional motor workshop could entertain the car owners, if only maintenance and service appointments are fixed earlier. A professional salesperson will never meet his prospects, unless appointments are granted.

Making telephone calls are my professional job to gain the confidence with my prospects and clients. Before I call upon them in person, I make sure my appointments are assured first through a courtesy phone call. For the purposes of sharing with those who sell, I normally speak with this line...."Mr prospect, is this coming Monday at lunch 12.30pm or Wednesday afternoon at 3.00pm be nice and convenient for us to meet". With options the answer are always positive and I would request with another favour.... "You prefer to meet over at my office or shall I come to your office or lets meet at my club." I had been applying them for years and they had not failed me.

Somebody whispered over my ears. What about sex appointments? In our corporate world when everyone is busy with their working life, both husband and wife or lovers might find little time to have intimacy together. By the time both couples who return home, they are already dead tired, allowing restricted time for love making. Even they might try to have some closeness, they do it reluctantly because time is a constraint to either one of the love partners. Suggestion, I think is good to fix an appointment for a love making session, especially for those who are very career minded couples.

Try this! "My little darlinggggGGG.... is this Saturday nite at around 7pm, can we have some romance, when I could take you for a candle light dinner plus music, follow by rocking the boat?Or you prefer, tomorrow a Sunday when we just make love in the afternoon. You like our love nest or rather check us into the Hilton for some boogie fun nite?" I wonder what my little darling loves!!! Appointments are important, whether in business or in romance. They fulfill the objectives for controlling and managing time as the ORIGINAL PURPOSE.

What is time - "There is an appointed time (zman) for everything. And there is a time (’êth) for every event under heaven–A time (’êth) to give birth, and a time to die; A time to plant, and a time to uproot what is planted.A time to kill, and a time to heal; A time to tear down, and a time to build up.A time to weep, and a time to laugh; A time to mourn, and a time to dance.A time to throw stones, and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace, and a time to shun embracing.A time to search, and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep, and a time to throw away.A time to tear apart, and a time to sew together; A time to be silent, and a time to speak.A time to love, and a time to hate; A time for war, and a time for peace.
– Ecclesiastes 3:1–8

Faithful in my career.

I might not be the star of my company, neither am I the greatest producer or a multi million agency to boost about. However I can be proud to claim, I am faithful and loyal to the only one insurance company I represent ever since I started. During these twenty six years of selling life insurance, I have had seen my company grow from a small unknown setup to a much bigger establishment now. I had seen the up and down of our business. In between this period, I had countless opportunities to deviate into other lucrative business ventures. I was approached many times by other insurance companies to take up their tempting offer by joining them. As I am a man of principle, I was thought rightfully by my parents, "nothing is more important that faithfulness in life". They said, you need not be rich or smart, but faithfulness will always bring you joy and peace. Perhaps might not be true to others, because there are many agents and staffs who like to hop from one place to another. Most people see new pastures are always greener over the other side.

The purpose of me writing this particular title is to assure my friends, especially my valuable clients. No matter what happen, I will remain and be faithful to my company and loyal to my clients who have supported me this far in business. Money is useful but faithfulness is a character of a person with a right attitude. In the dictionary, faithful means having full of faith, worthy of trust or belief and reliable. I choose to be faithful in all my doing. Work and love. They come together for a person to be happy.

Food for the thought - "The greatest revolution of our generation is the discovery that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives - William James.

I need not smoke to conduct business.

Most business men smoke and drink. They claimed, without smoking and drinking, it would be difficult to conduct business. Not me! I hate smoking and I drink very little, but yet I could stay in the selling world for more than forty years. All my clients respect me for being a non smoker and non drinker. I wonder whether it is necessary to smoke and drink to get sales or these habits are merely for pleasure sake. Of course, smoking is one way to open a sale and drinking could be another way to hold the sales. As I was brought up in a very strict environment, I prefer to gather all my sales with a sincere heart and maintain all my sales with a faithful mind.

Talking about my childhood days, we never had a gut to smoke as a student. Our discipline was firm and strict in the school. Those who were caught smoking, the capital punishment was the cane. Smokers were considered as outcast and unpopular then. Time has changed. Today in school, if you are a non smoker, you will be branded as unpopular. I have three sons. I am glad at least I have one, who is a non smoker like me.

I think a person who doesn't smoke is more discipline. His outlook of life is stronger and his health is fitter. He appreciates almost everything and he understands life greater. Ladies like men who do not smoke. Otherwise little darling would have left me long time back. If you think smoking is good, please write some comments to let us know.

Food for the thought -"The way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not." - Mark Twain

Malaysia is my home.

Khan is a Bangladeshi who has been working in our country for few years. He came as a tourist but remain as an illegal worker without proper documentation. His passport has been expired for quite sometime and he knew it would not be safe to move around. He had been serving me well as a waiter and we became good friend. Out of trust, he revealed his true identity and immigration problem to me. He has no intention to return to his homeland because he loves Malaysia. I was surprised he has admiration for our country. He likes our multi racial unity, the different cultures and religions, varieties of exotic food, beautiful weather, cleanliness, interesting environment, friendly atmosphere and a safe place to live. He hopes and prays that he has a way to be granted for a PR, permanent resident one day.

I am sure, Khan isn't the only foreigners who wishes to stay in our country. Mark, an American who has been residing in Malacca for twenty years loves our beaches. He hasn't returned home ever since he opened a pub there. Barry, a Norwegian, married to our local beauty ten years ago, adores our place. Rinnie, an Italian lady has been working here since young, takes Malaysia as her home. These are all my friends who are not Malaysian yet but they are proud to be here. Sad to say, there are many Malaysian who are not. For the past years, many of my clients had left this country for another. They could be telling me all the various excuses for leaving, I still think my country, Malaysia is the best home for me. I believe, everywhere is the same...is just depend on how our mind plays. No place would be ideal if your heart has no love and happiness. I got my love and happiness from my friends, family and my little darling.

Food for the thought - "Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need." - Sarah Ban Breathnach

Do you consider yourself in love?

How do you consider yourself, you are in love? Fifty years ago, a slight glance through a match make was considered a love. Forty years ago, when I had a chance to date a girl only once, the whole neighbourhood would take us as lovers. Thirty years ago, a kiss with a lady was no joke. She would take it as you already love her. What about today? I am sure things have changed. Even a couple could have sex the minute they met, might not mean anything at all. They could have sex merely for fun and needs, without the slightest feeling of love towards each other. Right?

Is interesting here! Let me share my experiences and you readers would love them. If I could hide my hands and fingers underneath the dinning table, rubbing my little darling thigh and buttock, and she doesn't mind, I am pretty sure she loves me. Agree? Or she could be tickling my feet with her leg while sitting, and I am not the least bother by the surrounding, she knows I love her as well. Right? These are only gestures but they tell the couples are in love. What about you?

When I see the lady holding the gentleman arm while walking together, I know she loves him. Hugging and kissing might not be necessary in love. Friends of the opposite sex do it most of the time for sincere friendship. If I allow my little darling to pay the bills by using my wallet, I am telling her...I love her. When you see me holding her handbag while shopping, she is telling me...darling I love you. Don't be mistaken when you see couples holding hands while crossing road. A gentleman should help a lady to cross the road by doing that. Not me! Whenever I cross any road with my little darling, I dip my hand into her back pocket, almost able to feel her inside. Or if she has no back pocket, she would slide her tender fingers into mine. Flesh to flesh and skin to skin we touch each other. Don't you consider this is in love?

A couple eating together closely might not necessary be in love. However when I eat and drink with my little darling, we share with only one drink and one plate on the table. Not that we are stingy but the sharing makes us more loving. This is in love. Kissing and hugging could be common. The adventurous one like my little darling, likes to whistle her words nearer to my ears. She even bites my nose and ears out of excitement. Telling me in body language...I am crazy with you. My God! Things have changed. Including the way love is shown. So! My readers on this blog...how do you consider yourself in love. Are you brave to reveal?

Food for the heart - "Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is." - Diane Ackerman

Thinking of her.

To that special lady I love....

You might be afar

But your heart is always a near

I might not be able to touch you

But for sure I could feel you

Mmmmmm...

Your look is sweetie

Your words are witty

Your eyes are sexy

My mind goes crazy

When you swing your solid breasts

My hand will never fail to press

Muuurschhhh...

I need you badly

Coz I love you dearly

Without you, life is nothing

Darling, you are something

Just want to say...I love you

While waiting for you.

A romantic phrase shared by one of my supportive reader, Lee - "Men always want to be woman's first love. Women like to be a man's last romance."

Have patience in selling.

Had been writing too much on sex and romance lately. Let me be a bit more serious today. Ah! Perhaps this might be useful to those who sell.

I was introduced to an attractive lady, Rinnie who had interest to know more about life insurance. Nor Eliz, a friend also my client, insisted that Rinnie should meet up with me. In order to let her feel comfortable, I brought along my little darling as partner for the evening. Rinnie had been approached by many agents before. She thought I would be no different from them, who were too eager to push their products on their first meeting. As expected, when we met her, though she was friendly I could still feel her resistance. My experience, tells me 'nobody will like to be sold in the first visit'. Instead of introducing myself as an agent, I approached her more like a friend. Not one word was mentioned on insurance matter. May be she was wondering why! Am I not interested to sell! We were talking about life and happening. She told us about her past and experiences. Her stories amazed us. Finally we knew her better and soon we were comfortable with each other. We were laughing and joking. My little darling was there to add a few interesting woman's comfort and assurance. At the end, we became good friends for the day. Before we left, Rinnie requested a proposal for an insurance program for herself and only daughter. Something we did not ask!

This was what Rinnie told us later. She likes our soft approach. I was calm and relaxed which reflex my professionalism and understanding of people. I was not desperate to sell, when most others would have. My first objective was to sell myself with little darling support. Unless I was accepted as a marketable person, I know it would not be easy to introduce our products to this intelligent lady. Yes! It might have taken a bit more time to know her but the success rate is greater and more effective. Patience is the game in professional selling.

Food for the thought - "Patience is the most necessary quality for business, many a man would rather you heard his story than grant his request." - Lord Chesterfield

Learning more about sex.

My recent title..."When is the right age for sex?" drew a lot of attention. It was my highest hit score ever since I started blogging. Looks like readers love the subject SEX more than anything else. I had a handful of comments which added more interesting information. They were unbelievable facts and could be useful to society. Perhaps many could have missed reading them.

For instead, one wise reader said..."There is no correct age at which you are “supposed” to have sex. Everyone has to make a very personal decision about what is right for them. How does one decide when the time is right to have sex for the first time? Asking yourself the following questions is a good start and might help you determine how you really feel without the pressure from friends or that “special person”:

1. Do you have any moral, religious or cultural convictions that might make deciding to have sex the wrong decision for you? Maybe you want to wait until you are married?

2. How do you feel about the relationship with your partner that you are in at the moment?

3. What do you think might happen as a result of having sex? Do you really understand the potential consequences? The physical and emotional consequences?

4. How do you think you will feel about your partner and more importantly, about yourself?

5. What do you know about STDs and birth control?

6. What are each of you willing to do to prevent these situations?

7. Right now -- how do you feel about your partner? Do you trust, respect and love him or her? Are those feelings mutual?

8. Do you feel pressured to have sex? Is there pressure from your partner, friends or any other reason?

9. Do you feel that you and your partner can make a decision right now and does it feel comfortable to you?

10. Can you talk openly to your partner about your decision?

Another reader who wrote a short but yet powerful statement..."SEX, oh Sex... u are beautiful but painful". I think he/she is right.

If you read on their comments dated Tuesday o7 Oct, you would learn more about the facts of life. Indeed I am glad to those who had shared and contributed their knowledge and experiences on my blog. Thank you so much to these beautiful people who were not shy to talk about sex.

Is this a joke - "The Englishman can get along with sex quite perfectly so long as he can pretend that it isn't sex but something else." - James Agate

Are you a giver?

Most people don't smile. If you don't believe me, walk around, any where, in the mall or the park, just look and stare at those passersby. Don't be afraid! Observe closely their facial expression. They look more like robot than human being. Everyone seems to be busy but deep down in their heart, they are hungry for compliments from others. Everyone is waiting for another person to offer a 'hey' or a 'smile'. I wonder a 'hey' or a 'smile' is that very expensive to give.

Not a few friends of mine! They are real givers than receivers. One of them is Farizah, a special lady with a Midas touch. Wherever she goes, she brings along her sweet smile to the people she meets. She throws her smile and gives sweet words. She always likes to address friends as darling, honey or even sweetheart. To those she doesn't know, she might say something like, "Hey handsome" or "Hi Sweetie." Her smiles and words really capture a lot of attention. I love to meet her because she will never fail to address me as "darling" plus a tight warm hug from her.

Another great lady I have is my little darling who is also a great givers of energy. Wherever she goes, she will always makes sure she touches the heart of the person she meets. I had seen her making waiters laugh with excitement. My personal driver likes her company because she jokes and shares with him. All her friends love her because she gives more than she receives. I am also equally engrossed my her action...a lady who loves to make others happy.

I have to be thankful to these friends who taught me to smile and to love others more. Why wait for someone to smile when I could smile first. Why have to wait for the "hello" from a stranger, when I could say it first, "hey brother, how are you?" You have the choice to be a giver or a receiver. I choose to be a giver and my life will definitely be happier.

Food for the thought - "What's the use of worrying? It never was worth while, so pack up your troubles in your old knit bag, and smile, smile, smile." — George Asaf.

When is the right age to have sex?

Over a gathering this topic was discussed; "When is the right age to have sex?" Mmmmm!!!! Sounds interesting but could be shy to the many. Years back the word SEX was a hidden word. It could be uttered only strictly within the four walls. Today, a little child knows how to spell it correctly. Today, we see teenagers as young as twelve or slightly older, could be holding hands and hugging each other. Whether their intimacy is merely fun or not is debatable. Some of them threw challenges on sex as a game and contest. Not only the boys are brave but the girls are obliging too. Is scary but is true.

Sex is important for sure. Physically and mentally the need is there. The question is, when is the right age to have sex then. I believe the ladies and gentlemen both want the answer. Is a difficult question because physically, one might want to have sex but when the mind isn't ready, sex could be dangerous to be involved. Morally and spiritually there are rules and restriction. However are they effective is subjective again. Shall we have sex only when we get marry? Looks decent and practical but what happen when one is unable to get marry for some reasons. Some said, why wait, do it when you are still young. The next question, how young is young to have sex!!

I really have no definite and exact answer. The nearest I could recommend is... have sex only when your mind knows what is sex. The understanding and purpose of sex, the result for having sex, the pleasure you gain out of sex and the consequences through sex. If you do not have these basic knowledge on sex but rather is just physical sex needs, I am sorry to say... you are at the wrong sex age. Perhaps there are readers who can offer some comments here.

Do you know - "Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing." - Woody Allen

Older men are more likable.

Young man asked, "Why younger women fall for older men?" Older man replied, "Coz younger men do not know how to appreciate women as much as us. They hurt women more than they should love them."

Young man was doubtful and his eyes blinked with curiosity. In order to clear his confusion, let me illustrate a partially true story. Janet was only seven when she was given to the grand parents to look after, while her parents needed to work. A sex maniac uncle molested her from time to time. Nobody was aware and the poor little girl was afraid to report to her parents. It casted a fearful shadow over her for the rest of her life. When she was in high school, a boy friend forcibly raped her without her consent. It was another black shadow for her. She managed to get marry before turning 30, thinking a family life was the ideal way to go around. Luck was not there for poor Janet either. The jealous husband did little to love and care for her. After her birth to a baby girl, she was separated from the husband. Alone she had to work and fend for herself and the daughter. For the next couple of years, she met three different men who claimed to love her dearly. Regrettably all turned out to be playful and irresponsible wolves, who were just there to take advantage of this broken hearted Janet. Enough is enough! The sorrow and frustration almost torn Janet apart. It took her many months and years to rebuild her inner strength and mind. The deep wound inflicted in her heart, made her a stronger lady of today. She is a smarter, independence, aggressive and no nonsense lady now. She could smell the naughtiness of any approachable men who had bad intention on her. She had lost hope and desire for man. She did not trust men any longer. She was afraid to fall in love again.

One fine day after many years had passed, Janet by fate met a much older man who spoke the language of love. Love has magic which touched her heart once more. She told this man.."Darling, no one had pampered me like how you do...no one had been so genuine like how you treat me... no one had been so sincere like you who care for me so much... no one had spoken so truthfully from the heart like you do... and most importantly no one had loved me like how you love me with so much of passion... just want to say I love you." Thanks God! Janet is in love again. Not with a younger man of course. They were given the chances but they took her for granted. The older man heals her love frustration and distrust, and allowing her to feel wanted and accepted in love again. Younger men cause miseries and sorrow. Whereas older men bring joy and happiness.

Food for the thought -"Love is often nothing but a favorable exchange between two people who get the most of what they can expect, considering their value on the personality market." - Erich Fromm

Ask and U might get!

Kelvin is a good responsible supervisor for a Japanese restaurant. However lately when we patronized his place, he sounded quite moody. Over a short discussion, we realized he wasn't too happy with his current employment. He had intention to leave for something better. I could not blame him, because most younger people thought the other side is always greener. Kelvin is only 24, full of vibrant and has the potential to grow.

According to him, he would be happy if he ever got the chance to be the manger of this company. He claimed, it isn't easy for him to reach this position because there are too many senior staffs above him. Rather than to waste time, leaving for another job might be faster to prosper.

I knew this young man needed some advices here. I suggested to him, before you consider to leave, please have the courage to meet your boss first. The boss who could decide on company affairs and matters. Tell him, you like working with him. Tell him, this is THE COMPANY you like to work. Tell him, you are to give your best to his company. Tell him, you are not going to be distracted by the employment market outside. Tell him, you will remain faithful and sincere as long as you live. Tell him, you are to offer your soul and faith to him. Tell him, your ultimate goal is to be the manager of this company. Now ask him, "Boss, in order for me to reach this position one day. Can you tell me what are the requirements and criterion needed? It may take years, I will try to fulfill them." If this boss, can't answer your question, I don't think he is the ideal boss to work with. A practical and sensible employer could offer you a challenging reply instead.

How I wished, when I was young and someone taught me to ask. Perhaps I would not have wasted too much time to look for a perfect place to work. Kelvin was lucky. He promised to see his boss sooner, when he would relate the outcome to us next month. I wish him good luck and so do those who read my blog now.

How true are these few words - "Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness" - James Thurber

To someone special on his birthday.

Birthday is the sweetest day for everyone. I remembered when my children were young, I would never fail to celebrate their birthdays. As little boys, they longed to wait for their turn and hoping their father would give them a birthday present. Sometimes I took them to the McDonald outlets where their friends were invited for the birthday parties. I could see their delight and joy while they sang the birthday song and blowing the candles to make a wish. Until today, all those remembrances and sweet memories will not be forgotten.

Today is my first son birthday. Although he is happily married and staying afar, I still treat him like a little child. Its not easy to think what is best for him as a birthday present, because I know he already has all the nice things in the world. Instead I wrote him a meaningful birthday message which was sent by email this morning. I could not buy him a great gift but words from the heart is most touching present.

This was written to him. "Hi son....Quality is never an accident, it is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, intelligent direction and skillful execution, it represents the wise choice of many alternatives. You definitely represent that person of high quality. For these...I take the opportunity to wish you Happy Birthday my son. Dad won't forget..coz u are too important for me...I love all of you. Dad....the naught one."

Few minutes later, he replied...."hi dad, thanks for the well wishes and the powerful words below. It really makes my day even more special. I love you too dad. Alvin Foo."

The about words speak it all. No matter where you are and who you are, remembering someone you love on his birthday means a lot to that particular person.

This is the beautiful quote and is especially for you -"Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed."~Charles Schulz

When is the right time to invest?

I might not be an expert in the financial market, many of my insurance clients seek my financial advices from time to time. There is no secret formula to invest, especially in the capital market when everything is possible. A good time might be a bad time to invest, or a bad time could even be a better time. Most people opt to take the ride when the market is positive but when it is down, the fear is too great for normal people to place their cash. Personally I think the best time to invest is when everyone is selling. That will be the time when everything is cheap.

Maram is a lucky friend who had taken my advice to keep cash. Upon retiring, he was paid a handsome golden handshake quite lately. As usual most working class, often get excited when they hold a large sum of cash in saving. Their hand always get itchy and their mind wanting to buy almost everything they see. I hold Maram firmly, reminding him not to be fooled by his short excitement. He has been very patience so far, taking my advice to wait for the opportunity.

Quite recently the world economy took a down turn. At the same time, at our local scene we face some political outcry too. Meanwhile Maram send me a short text. He wrote, "Hi! Bob, everything ok? Looks like the earthquake has started? What are your learned view!" My reply was, "The earthquake is shaking but it hasn't exploded yet. It might take weeks or months before it erupts. So please be patience and await for its lava to spill. Ok?" I was given this compliment, "U really sound like an expert in archaeology! Will look out for the lava?? Sexy too!! Thanks." I am sure Maram will strike his financial jackpot.

Food for the thought - "We would never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world" - Helen Kellar

Have you found your love magic?

Are you in love? I am very sure one of my buddy friend is in love. He is so proud to have fallen in love with a much younger sweetheart. She is beautiful, attractive, intelligent and dynamic. There were many romeos who were trying their luck to be closed with her, while my buddy was courting her at the same time. Finally when both mated, the man became the HERO!! He claimed there were more than ten men before him. He was specially selected out of the many, because he has all the qualities of a true gentleman. I strongly believe the lady knows her ideal man for she must had gone through many mistakes of life, including love mistakes. In view of my buddy is an old friend, I too have known his past background. He had also experienced the toughest challenge of life to know what he wants. To succeed in life, he needs an exciting and most understanding woman and I am glad he has found one at the moment. To spur him to the next higher level....and this is what I have got from my little darling the magic of love.

My buddy knows what he wanted because he is definitely a man of confidence who had gathered lots of experiences. For every successful man, comes another successful lady to be with him. This buddy does not want me to reveal his name but I certainly wish him success and happiness with this new found love of his. She is the apple of his eyes. I have got mine and so is him. What about you? Do you have your energy of magical love?

Today double dosage of love vitamins "Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." - Robert Frost and "Love is often nothing but a favorable exchange between two people who get the most of what they can expect, considering their value on the personality market." - Erich Fromm

Good Samaritan!

I was driving to Port Dickson resort with my little darling, when we saw an accident with two bodies lying beside the highway. They were motionless and I could sense that it must be a serious accident. Little darling requested me to stop. Perhaps we could give some helping hand to the needed one. We parked our car further up and walked back to see what actually happened. Upon reaching nearer to the site, I saw two young Malay male motor cyclists, who were already dead. From the scene, it looked like there was a nasty motor accident crash between both of them. One had a severe head injury and the other had his face smashed up, beyond recognized. Little darling almost vomited when she saw the dead bodies under such cruel and horrible condition. She was terrified, trembled and speechless.

There were many cars passing by on this highway. Most were curious to stare on what was happening. The saddest thing was, they drove off when they saw plenty of blood and parts of human flesh were strewn all over the road. The only people who stopped were those who drove smaller cars. The bigger expensive one, never even bother to look at. I and my little darling were the only Chinese who came out to provide some assistance. Upon checking, one kind hearted Malay man had called to the police and the ambulance for help. As we knew nothing much could be done, we left later making sure the police was on the way to clear the necessary.

I learned something from this accident. The rich can be successful but is the poor and simple peasant who really has the heart as a good Samaritan. The rich have time for you, if only they could be benefited from the time given. Not the simple ordinary people! They might not be able to offer financial support but they are more sympathetic in heart. What is the point of being rich in wealth when you are not rich in heart! I am glad that my little darling has the richness of heart, she sympathised the victims and a short prayer was given.

Food for thought -"One cannot weep for the entire world, it is beyond human strength. One must choose." - Jean Anouilh

Beauty excites me.

It was party time and there were many attractive females around. The way they dressed could make all men turned our eyes. From top to bottom, they were really gorgeous. Their hairdo were magnificently done, plus a perfect makeup. They were brave and courageous who worn the latest low cut, when the front bust line could almost be seen. With very low tight jeans, I wondered whether it going to fall out.

I was admiring and appreciating their beauty of all kind. Over a drink, I got a chance to speak with some interesting ladies. I was frank to throw this question to them...."Your sexiness and charm have captured my imagination. My mind is excited. My heart pumps greater. Even my little dick got erected without reason. I try to control my emotion, knowing well that I should behave. However sight cannot be blinded when I can see. Your attractiveness and beauty are irresistible. Ladies...please tell me...am I right or wrong to react in such a manner towards you girls?"

Surprisingly these were their views. Most claimed that they were delighted to hear my frank statement. They felt extremely nice and proud to know that they possess attraction and beauty of a sexy woman. According to them, they dressed to their best for the purpose to be admired by others, especially for men to look upon. They were equally excited to know that I was aroused by their external beauty. They were not offended with my imagination and emotion. In fact, they felt great for me that I could get a hidden erection, proving I am still a very healthy person. Wow!! That was something to hear.

Have to ask little darling whether the above is a true fact of life....when ladies are beautiful, men will be inspired and their mind will be thrilled.

Food for the heart- "The only lasting beauty is the beauty of the heart" - Mevlana Rumi (1207-1273)