Who is the most important person to you?

As I was about to get into my car, a sweet lady agent greeted me, "Hi! Robert, how are you? Is nice to meet you here. We had always wanted to learn from you. Would be good if you could give me a tip in selling."

I was actually busy but I knew it wasn't easy to talk sensibly over in the car when she was standing. I told her, "Ok! Let's have a cup of coffee nearby and perhaps I can squeeze 20 minutes with you."

Over in the cafe shop, I asked her again,"My dear, can you tell me who is the most important person to you at the moment? Without hesitation she said, "I love my dad. He isn't around any more. Robert, you look like my father and I enjoy talking with you."

She wanted a tip in selling. To be successful in selling, treat all your friends, clients, prospects or even strangers if you bound on them, as though they are like your father. As your dad is the most important person you love, naturally you will treat him with respect, kindness, patience, smiles, laughter, understanding and plenty of warm. You spoke with sincerity without the slightest thought of making money from him. You let him felt important and acceptance. You felt proud to be with him. You felt honour to be with him at all time. You were prepared to give anything he requested. You didn't feel bored to be with him. You talked with excitement and laughed so much when he was around. You melted his heart, until he felt for you as well.

I asked her, "My dear, can you treat everyone as important as you had treated your dad?" She stared at me in a haze without uttering a word. I continued, "I delayed my appointment to have this cup of coffee with you first. Coz I know you are too important for me at the moment. I hope you can follow my footstep and I am sure you will be successful in all your future undertakings. I am sorry, I have to go now." I rushed to pay the bill coz I seldom allow ladies to pay when they are with me.

My first rule in selling - "Treat all your prospects and clients as important as the one you love most at the moment."

Man & woman relationship.

I had a keen lady reader from India who forwarded some interesting questions. She wanted me to write on this subject and to enlighten her. I wish to open to everyone, who might be able to contribute as well.

These are the exact following contents she wrote. Among us, there will be many of them, who are having some other affairs other than their girl friends/ boy friends, wives/ husbands.

So far in my concern, those relationships can be like these:

A) Relation of a "married man" with an "unmarried woman" or "married woman",

B) Relation of a "married woman" with an "unmarried man" or "married man",

c) Relation of an "unmarried person" with another one (opposite sex), even though he/she continuing a healthy relation with someone else.

These type of relations, quite often lead to physical (hope everyone could understand). So can any one tells, how far these types of relation are healthy.

a) Towards the bondings of the previous relations,

b) Even though it is not merely a physical, but also a very deep love towards the other one (from new relation),

c) Is it suitable to disclose a relation like this to the society (means family or other partner) (seeing the circumstances of Indian society),

d) If someone wants to continue a relation like this till the end ( here end means, end of life), is it a right decision or wrong?

Wooh!!! She had much to ask. I might have a little wisdom of life and gone through some mistakes, including love mistakes. But that doesn't mean I am an expert in love and romance. Nevertheless I will say a few words to this admirable female friend.

I always believe love has energy but it got to be true love from the heart and mind. The force from them create impact beyond imagination. No true love could work just with the mind coz mind alone isn't pure in thought. From the heart and mind, the love is more sincere and sweeter. If one party is pure and the other isn't, I am sure they will not gain the power of love. With the five senses created for mankind; sight, smell, taste, touch and hear, they should allow each man and woman to seek their rightful love. Plus if the couple concern is connected with true love, then it is a matter of time, they will witness the miracle of happening. I advise my friend there in India, "only the brave and the courage survives." In love, one has to be brave. Brave to approach and courageous to accept. Immaterial of what nationalities and races you are, our present world is for you to live for yourself and not to live for the sake of showing to others. The rest she has to decide herself. What about you, my readers?

Food for the thought - "The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart."

There are two different breakfasts in a morning.

I came home late last night and could not write my blog much earlier. Anyway as tomorrow is a Saturday when I don't need to work, I intend to sleep longer with my little darling. Before I dose off into our dreamworld, "Darling lets have our two breakfasts later in the morning!"

Some would be wondering why there are two breakfasts in the early morning. I give you a hint! Usually the first breakfast is served on bed without any preparation. In the wake of the morning hour when is still dark and quiet, one of us has to press for the call. Gently the man has to fondle and caress her partner. Her awakening has to be soft with whisper, otherwise she might not respond to this early breakfast in bed. When her interest and appetite is aroused, that is the time one would serve and the other receive. For better digestion, is always encouraged to try various styles of feeding and milking. Co-operation and teamwork end with fullest satisfaction of this meal. Immediately after this breakfast, its recommended to go back to sleep again. The next second meal would be served in the dinning with a set of Amercian breakfast, when both man and woman are contented and happier coz they had one earlier breakfast on bed.

Have you tried these two breakfasts in the morning? They help love to bloom and tie relationship together. I wish to have more. Because I believe - "The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom" - James Allen.

The five senses for buying & selling.

In any buying and selling, the five important senses are required. They are the sight, smell, taste, touch and voice. These are the buying and selling signals, depending on the products or services render. Through sight or visual is the easier and fastest means to sell. A catchy and sensational car model could tempt most interested buyers. No property could be sold without the illustrative design or preferable an exact model home for viewing. Delicious food is taken by smell and taste. You can never explain the smell of durian, until you have one in hand. Seeing a beautiful dress is nice but without touching its fabric, the lady might not buy it. All tangible products are sold through sight, smell, taste and touch, which I consider as easy transaction sales. However intangible product like life insurance cannot be sold by the above four senses, except through voice by talking, visualising, discussing, debating, arguing and listening.

Life insurance cannot be seen but it can be explained in words. It is a lasting product which has to be visualised in segments of time and needs. It cannot be smelled but you have to imagine the fragrance of flowers that surround the family. It is tasteless, yet it is so sweet when the peace of mind is gathered. Is only the contract papers that can be touched, but are spelled the hopes and dreams which offer promises and assurances. Is not an easy product to sell, because it needs a truthful voice with understanding, kindness, sincerity, honesty and patience of the heart to make it real and alive. If you are selling life insurance, are you using this voice to communicate?

A Chinese Proverb - "A filthy mouth with not utter decent languages."

Over-weight can kill.

Just a few days ago, one of my client's staff passed away all of a sudden. She was admitted for difficulty in breathing and on the second day she died. The whole company was taken aback because she was only twenty eight years young, married without child yet. It was only two months back I spoke to her, when her employer took medical insurance for the entire company. I needed to see her personally because she was extremely fat and over-weighted. Nevertheless my company effected her cover with some loading. Thanks God! Although she had left, not one cent on her medical charges was paid by her boss or her family. The timely cover took care of her heavy medical bills on time.

Back in her office, all her colleagues were sad and emotional. They could not believe such a young sweet girl could die so soon in live. I was there to share their sorrow and sadness. As their insurance agent, I could understand the cause of death to this unexpected lady. I noticed most of the female existing staffs there are fat and over weight as well. Without fear, I took the courage to ask permission to speak to all the staffs on this uneventful incidence. They were listening.

I told them, she died because she could not breath when her heart was congested with fats. Nothing could be done now but life is always a learning lesson. If death could happen to her, it could strike to any one of us here too. I was direct to indicate that not only the decease was over-weight but many of them in their office were also heavy in size. Most ladies who are not married would take the trouble to look good and beautiful, but sad to tell them not when they got marry. Married working women always claimed that they don't have time. They have to work in the day and care for the family at night. One word, they take life for granted! I suggested to them that they should consider seriously to exercise regularly plus proper diet with good nutrition. Regular exercising will built strength and muscle. Good nutritious diet will allow better health. Not only they are healthier, they look better in shape and style. This is also another way to capture the interest of their husbands, as their wives are still attractive to them. My final conclusion to them; let this incidence be a lesson to all of us. Love your body and your health will take care of you.

I was glad all the working staffs accepted and took my advices positively. They promised to start exercising soon. Each of them had set a target to reduce their unwanted fat according to their age and height. They are afraid to die too soon and also scared to loose their darling husbands. The boss was equally happy that I was telling the truth of life. I am more happier than them because I had convinced them to stay longer in this world.

Food for the heart - Sharing what you love. Lend others your favourite book. Let someone borrow your favourite clothes. Allow somebody else to drive your car. Treat your family to your favourite food. Loving is in sharing and sharing is loving.

A heart felt appreciative letter from a friend.

My recent title, "Giving rebate is a bad ethic in selling" was well read by many of my clients. Out of the many, I was deeply touched by an old friend, Dato Merican who is currently residing abroad, wrote to me upon reading my blog. I like to share his thought and feeling.

His email...."Yes, Robert. Yours was first email I read at 6am today after completing my morning prayer and meditation. I try to at least 10 minutes of meditation everyday immediately following my morning prayers. I try to mold this as my daily routine because the mind is still fresh at the early hours and more so after saying your prayers to God for thanking HIM to see another new day of your life in this 'temporary' world.

As I read your article, my mind which had just went through its training to attain clarity and calmness through the routine meditation, could easily travel back into time and recollect how we met and how you sold me insurance. What impressed me at that was your reply to my question, why you chose the insurance as your career. You told me, as follower as Buddhism, this was the only career you thought, could allow you to serve mankind in a way of giving him the protection he needs as he grows to face the world. Of course, I see it that every industry, in one form or another is a service oriented, whether it is banking, manufacturing, massage, etc, etc and so is the insurance. Since the time I met you three decades ago, we have had been in contact without much a long break. My policies had been matured many years ago and I no longer hold any policy with you but still our communication is alive and continuing. We have seen each other grow through the decades, you have not ceased your "services" to me. You are still sending me informative and motivational ideas and thoughts that suit my current age. You have helped in my financial needs. You ensured that my insurance was always alive during its tenure. Given me advices on handling problems related to family and business. So! In short, I want to say, you have lived to your words that you uttered to me three decades ago with your service to mankind. Best regards."

His letter was so appreciative that I almost cried while reading his contents. I started well and ended beautifully with the world. My belief - "The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with our heart." I am sure my friend and me have felt it in our heart. Dato Merican thank you for allowing me to serve you for these three decades as a friend.

Meaningful stories can move heart & mind.

A good life insurance agent has many roles to play. First he has to be an effective salesman plus knowing how to be an actor while selling. On top of it, be an interesting stories teller to those he meets. Not many prospects like to meet salesperson but if an agent could sell like an actor who dramatizes with emotion and action, then everyone loves to see him. Actor talks with reality, whereas salesperson speaks with intention. Actor moves with feeling, whereas salesman commercializes fear. Actor makes you laugh and cry, whereas sales surely drain you dry. A professional agent who has much experiences in life, story tells more than he sells. An inexperienced agent hard sells on his products by explaining all the benefits. He might not even know his prospects are the least interested in his selling. Prospects are not drawn with excitement and acknowledgement. Chances are rejections could be higher than acceptances.

As far as I am concerned, I sell when I need to be but I love to act more than to sell. All my words are spoken with the right tune, meaning and purposes. I practised my role plays many times before I act to sell. Today my acting is part of my natural character when it became real and entertaining for those I interact. There is a saying, "A picture is better than a thousand words!" Similarly I believe, "A meaningful story moves the heart and the mind!" Is difficult to explain the need of life insurance by illustrating just the product benefits. Telling emotional true stories depicting death and suffering are much easier to understand for the purpose to solve mankind living problems. Stories excite with feeling. Stories moves all obstacles. Stories make things easier to understand. Stories help prospects to buy. So why just be a salesman to sell when we could act and be a good stories teller in our challenging career. I hope these little information could be useful to those who excel in selling life insurance.

Food for the thought - "Don't bother just to be better than your comtemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself" - Willian Faulkner