THE WEDDING NIGHT ...

A naughty lady sent over this story to me....

THE WEDDING NIGHT
Paul and Mary get married
But couldn't afford a honeymoon
So they go back to Paul's Mom and Dad's house
For their first night together.

In the morning
Johnny - Paul's little brother -
Gets up and has his breakfast.

As he is going out of the door
To go to school - he asks his mom
If Paul and Mary are up yet.

She replies - No.

Johnny asks - Do you know what I think ?

His mom replies - I don't want to hear What you think !
Just go to school.

Johnny comes home for lunch
And asks his mom -
Are Paul and Mary up yet ?
She replies - No.
Johnny says - Do you know what I think ?
His mom replies - Never mind what you think ! Eat your lunch and go back to school ..

After school - Johnny comes home and asks again -
Are Paul and Mary up yet ?
His mom says - No.
He asks - Do you know what I think ?
His mom replies - Ok - now tell me what you think

He says - Last night Paul came to my room for the Vaseline and I think..
I gave him my super glue.

Food for thought - "Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak." - Epictetus

Lessons from Burnt Toast...

Shared by a gentle lady who cares....

When I was a little girl, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.

On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom, and ask me how my day was at school.

I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite! When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast. And I'll never forget what he said. 'Baby, I love burned toast.'

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night, and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, 'Debbie, your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired. And besides-a little burnt toast never hurt anyone! You know, life is full of imperfect things...and imperfect people. I'm not the best housekeeper or cook.'

What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults - and choosing to celebrate each other's differences - is the one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship. Burnt toast should never be a deal breaker. We could extend this to any relationship in fact - as understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship!!"

Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket - but into your own.

Food for thought - "People will always forget what you do, and they will always forget what you say, but they will never, ever forget the way you make them feel."

How do you reach your boiling point!!

I was brought up in a typical Chinese coffee shop of the past. Today they re brand the unpopular coffee shop to another name, they called as Kompitam which could be seen every corner of our cities. They served tasteful coffee and Hainanese tea for the locals.

As i was slipping my tea with some friends at one of the kompitam, i asked whether they had tried tea or coffee, with water boiled from charcoal. Yes! They hadn't. They had not experienced the old days when old & gas were not available then, we had to depend on wood & charcoal for fuel. Next, I asked another interesting question! What is the different between water boiled with charcoal and gas? Meaning two separate pots of water, one to be boiled by charcoal and the other one by gas, both boiled until reaching boiling point. Surprised me, non of these so called tea and coffee drinkers no the differences.

Though i am not a chemist or scientist, i learned from observation and curiosity, i explained the facts to these innocents. Water that is boiled with gas, reaches boiling point faster than with charcoal. However the hotness and temperature of water boiled with gas, cools down faster than water boiled with charcoal. Meaning water heated by charcoal retains the hotness longer than with gas. Water boiled with charcoal tastes better and fresher than with gas. A cup of coffee or tea, with water heated from charcoal is always served tastier and hot all the time. Don't believe me, you can try it at home.

'Gas' is like those who fall in love at the first sight. They get heated up fast, wild and crazy with their partners. At the same time, their desire and feeling diminishes very fast as well, when they are very bored with each other.

'Charcoal' is different. They fall in love slowly and surely. They take their own sweet time to understand one another. Once they get heated up, they will never fall apart.

I behaved like a 'gas lover' when i was young. Not now any longer! I am a 'charcoal lover' who believe in ever lasting love at peak point all the time until infinity. What are you, gas or charcoal lover?

Food for the heart - "The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread" - Mother Teresa.

Paul Harvey writes.

Good things must be shared.......

Can you answer this riddle?

Here is a pretty neat little thing from Paul Harvey. See if you can guess the riddle at the end.

Paul Harvey Writes:
We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I'd like better.

I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would.

I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.
I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.
And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.

It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.
I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.

I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him.

When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her.

I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.

On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.

If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.
I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.

When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.
I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy\girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.

May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.

I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it.. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.

I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle.

May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.

I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Hannukah/Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.

These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it's the only way to appreciate life.

Written with a pen.. Sealed with a kiss. I'm here for you. And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.

Send this to all of your friends. We secure our friends, not by accepting favors, but by doing them.

Paul Harvey RIDDLE:
When asked this riddle, 80% of kindergarten kids got the answer, compared to 17% of Stanford Universityseniors.

What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it, you'll die?

Slimming Centre.

Click to enlarge cartoon......................................................................................................

I laughed until i could not breath and i like to share it with my Sunday's readers.

Food for thought - "My way of joking is to tell the truth, It's the funniest joke in the world" — George Bernard Shaw.

Relaxation is important.

A joker shared his story....

In 1923, Who Was:

1. President of the largest steel company?
2.. President of the largest gas company?
3. President of the New York stock Exchange?
4. Greatest wheat speculator?
5. President of the Bank of International Settlement?
6. Great Bear of Wall Street?

These men were considered some of the worlds most successful of their days..
Now, 80 years later do you know what ultimately became of them?

The Answers:

1. The president of the largest steel company.
Charles Schwab, died a pauper.

2. The president of the largest gas company,
Edward Hopson, went insane.

3. The president of the NYSE, Richard Whitney,
was released from prison to die at home.

4. The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger,
died abroad, penniless.

5. The president of the Bank of International Settlement,
shot himself.

6 The Great Bear of Wall Street, Cosabee Livermore,
also committed suicide

However, in that same year, 1923, the PGA Champion
and the winner of the most important golf tournament, the US Open, was Gene Sarazen.
What became of him?
He played golf until he was 92,
died in 1999 at the age of 95.
He was financially secure at the time of his death.

The Moral: Fuck work... Play golf.

Food for thought - "Show me a worrying person and I will show you a person who does not know how to relax" — Albert E. Cliffe

U have to stay longer to make it easy in selling.

Selling tip....

Selling life insurance is like preaching a religion. The longer you preach, the better your preaching would be. All preacher start a hard way in the spiritual world, and not all could remain in this holy acceptance. As a young preacher, he has to master the spiritual teaching and later be able to recite his holy book from front to back and back to front. At the beginning, he has to carry his holy book wherever he goes. He needs to quote the chapters and verses with it when he preaches and conducts sermons. Not all he sees and approaches would believe in him. With patience, tolerance and strong belief, he matures to be a stronger preacher. He understands the implication of his holy teaching, he knows how to relate the chapters and verses to laymen terms, he listens and to understand his followers, his words tend to be sweeter and loving, his presence earns respect and value, and everyone loves to meet him. As he grows to be a senior preacher, he needs not preach anymore because everyone wants to be blessed by him. He just has to lay his hand over your head and softly says, "Child I Bless You!" The one who is blessed by him would feel nice and delighted. He has this divine energy and force because he had walked the spiritual life for more than thirty years.

I believe selling life insurance is the same. At the beginning i tried to master all about the insurance products, even when i could recite my rate book in details, nobody was prepared to buy insurance from me. Walking the same path like a preacher, i have been selling this religion for twenty eight years. Today i don't carry any laptop or reference charts to sell like most younger agents do. I only bring along my warm heart and wisdom of life to share with my prospective clients. The minute i think they are ready, i just have to say,"Please put your OK here on our proposal form and i will make sure everything is in order for you". The many years of commitment, sincerity and passion over my work, i too have earned the divine energy and force to be accepted by my clients.

Trust me my fellow colleagues, the longer you stay in this business, the easier the business would be for you. Love the career and the business would love you.

Food for thought - "Success is sweet and sweeter if long delayed and gotten through many struggles and defeats." - Amos Bronson Alcott