Sunday, October 31, 2010

NECROPHILIA


A man was brought before the judge and charged with NECROPHILIA (making love to a dead person)

The judge told him, "In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting, immoral thing. Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the jail keys in the toilet?"

The man replied, "I'll give you THREE good reasons:

1. It's none of your damn business;
2. She was my wife; and.....
3. I didn't KNOW she was dead, she ALWAYS acted that way!"
...............................................

Someone suggested -
SO LADIES TRY TO MOVE A LITTLE DURING THE GAME…..

GUYS, IF THERE IS NOT MUCH MOVEMENT, STOP IMMEDIATELY AND CHECK IF SHE IS ALIVE.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Appreciation.


感恩的故事 (Story of Appreciation) all the way from Great China.

一名成績優秀的青年去申請一個大公司的經理職位。
One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.

他通過了第一級的面試,董事長做最後的面試,做最後的決定。
He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

董事長從該青年的履歷上發現,該青年成績一 貫優秀,從中學到研究生從來沒有間斷過。
The director discovered from the CV, that the youth's academic result is excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never has a year he did not score.

董事長問,你在學校裏拿到獎學金嗎?該青年回答,沒有。
The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarship in school?" and the youth answered "none".

董事長問,是你的父親 為您付學費嗎?該青年回答,我父親在我一歲時就去世了,是我的母親給我付的學費。
The director asked, " Is it your father pay for your school fees?" the youth answered, my father passed away when I was one year old, it is my mother who paid for my school fees.

董事長問,那你的母親是在那家公司高就?該 青年回答,我的母親是給人洗衣服的。
董事長要求該青年把手伸給他,該青年把一雙潔白的手伸給董事長。
The director asked, " Where did your mother worked?" the youth answered, my mother worked as cloth cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hand, the youth showed a pair of hand that is smooth and perfect to the director.

董事長問,你幫你母 親洗過衣服嗎?該青年回答,從來沒有,我媽總是要我多讀書,再說,母親洗衣服比我快得多。
The director asked, " Did you ever help your mother washed the cloth before?" The youth answered, never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books, furthermore, my mother can wash cloths faster than me.

董事長說,我有個要求,你今天回家,給你母 親洗一次雙手,明天上午你再來見我。
The director said, I had a request, when you go back today, go and help to clean your mother's hand, and then see me tomorrow morning.

該青年覺得自己成功的可能很大,回到家後,高高興興地要給母親洗手,母親受寵若驚地把手伸給孩子。
The youth felt that its chance of landing the job is high, when he went back, he happily wanted to clean his mother's hand, his mother feel strange, happy but mixed with fear, she showed her hand to the kid.

該 青年給母親洗著手,漸漸地,眼淚掉下來了,因為他第一次發現,他母親的雙手都是老繭,有個傷口在碰到水時還疼得發抖。
The youth cleaned his mother's hand slowly, his tear drop down as he did that. It is first time he found his mother's hand is so wrinkled, and there are so many bruises in her hand. Some bruises incites pains so strong that shiver her mother's body when cleaned with water.

青年第一次體會到,母親就是 每天用這雙有傷口的手洗衣服為他付學費,母親的這雙手就是他今天畢業的代價。
This is the first time the youth realized and experienced that it is this pair of hand that washed the cloth everyday to earn him the school fees, the bruises in the mother's hand is the price that the mother paid for his graduation and academic excellence and probably his future.

該青年給母親洗完手後,一聲不響地把母親剩下要洗的衣服都洗了。
After finishing the cleaning of his mother hand, the youth quietly cleaned all remaining clothes for his mother.

當天晚上,母親和孩子聊了很久很久。
That night, mother and sons talked for a very long time.

第二天早上,該青年去見董事長。
Next morning, the youth went to the director's office

董事長望著該青年紅腫的眼睛,問到,可以告訴我你昨天回家做了些什麼嗎?
The director noticed the tear in the youth's eye, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"
該青年回答說,我給母親洗完手之後, 我幫母親把剩下的衣服都洗了。
The youth answered, "I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes."
董事長說,請你告訴我你的感受。
The director asked, "please tell me your feeling."

該青年說,第一,我懂得了感恩,沒有我 母親,我不可能有今天。第二,我懂得了要去
和母親一起勞動,才會知道母親的辛苦。第三,我懂得了家庭親情的可貴
The youth said, Number 1, I knew what is appreciation, without my mother, there would not be the success of me today. Number 2, I knew how to work together with my mother, then only I can realize how difficult and tough to get something done. Number 3, I knew the importance and value of family relationship.

董事長說,我就是要錄取一個會 感恩,會體會別人辛苦,不是把金錢當作人生第一目標的人來當經理。你被錄取了。
The director said, "This is what I am asking, I want to recruit a person that can appreciate the help of others, a person that knew the suffering of others to get thing done, and a person that would not put money as his only goal in life to be my manager. You are hired."
這位青年後來果真工作努力,深得職工擁護,員工也都努力工作,整個公司業績大幅成長。
Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates, every employees worked diligently and in a team, the company's result improved tremendously.

假如一位孩子從小嬌生慣養,習 慣了被人圍著寵著,什麼都是“我”第一,父母的辛苦都不知道,上班後,以為同事都應該聽他的,當了經理後,不知道員工的辛苦,還要怨天尤人。這樣的人,會有好的學校成績,會有得意風光的一時,但社會上的這類人,都不能成大事,都不會感覺到幸福,都要跌跟鬥,那父母是愛孩子呢還是害孩子呢?
A child who has been protected and habitually given whatever he did, he developed "entitlement mentality" and always put himself first. He is ignorance of his parent's effort. When he started work, he assumed every people must listen to him, and when he became a manager, he would never know how suffering his employee and always blame others. For this kind of people, he can have good result, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel the sense of achievement, he will grumble and full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, did we love the kid or destroy the kid?
你可以讓你的孩子住 大房子,吃大餐,學鋼琴,看大屏電視,但你在割草時,也要讓你的孩子在大太陽下拔拔野草,你在吃飯後,也要讓你的孩子洗洗碗,不是你沒有錢雇人,而是你真心愛孩子。你要讓孩子知道,即使父母掙不少錢,但早早的白髮,和那位洗衣服的母親沒有本質的差別。但更重要的是,要讓你的孩子學會感恩。
You can let your kid lived in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experienced it. After a meal, let them washed their plate and bowl together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learn how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learn the ability to work with others to get thing done.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Cancer won't kill but fear yes!


Can cancer kills? Not all the time. In the course of selling life insurance, i had seen countless patients suffering from this dreadful disease. I think cancer is curable but the fear of having cancer kills.

Those of my clients who were diagnosed with cancer but had a very strong positive mind are still living. However those who were weak hearted die because they were scared and afraid. I believe they die out of fear rather than because of the sickness. There are two types of fear that cause the death of my friends. The first fear is of knowing they are suffering from cancer. The fear of thinking cancer is incurable when they have to mark for time. The second fear is the financial worries and concerns over the heavy medical cost to treat this illness. To beat the disease they need to have a strong spirit and mind. Now on top of it, they have to overcome the financial constraint. Fear of having no saving and have to borrow 'kills' eventually.

To reinforce a peaceful mind and assuring yourself that you won't have to face and bear those unnecessary "fears of cancer", buy medical insurance if you have not. This is one product that you buy when you don't need it coz when you need it, you can't buy. Funny isn't it?

Remember this
- "Fear kills everything. Your mind, your heart, your imagination" — Cornelia Funke

Thursday, October 28, 2010

You like to be beautiful or sexy?


There are so many definitions on beautiful and sexy female. Ask all women, i am sure they love to be beautiful and sexy too. Given a choice i wonder whether they prefer to be more beautiful or sexier. Being a naughty person i am, i asked all my dears around this morning by sending them a question.

My sms to them; "Hi dear... Pondering!!! Do you like to be sexy or beautiful? Pls... Only one choice."

1st lady to reply: "Of course is sexy! It's more than an art to be sexy though.."

Me: "May i know why?"

1st lady: "It attracts attention and feeling good. I like super sexy ...Zzzzzz!!"
...............................................................................

2nd lady: "None of that... Prefer to be attractive or interesting."

Me: " May i know why?"

2nd lady: "Sorry for late reply, getting ready for appointment. Didn't find two traits appealing, like no brain."
.............................................................................

3rd lady: "Sexy is better."

Me: " May i know why?"

3rd lady: "I think sexy is creativity, lively, motivation, movement, fun, thinking, attraction,young, vibrant, active...."
........................................................................................

4th lady: "Beautiful ok."

Me: "May i know why?

4th lady: "Hello so free today aa.. Later la my work is piling up."
....................................................................................................

5th lady: "I don't like to be any, i am beautiful."

Me: "May i know why?"

5th lady: "I know what i want now in life and enjoy every moment of it..."
..................................................................................................

My personal opinion... Beautiful is more natural or in born, whereas one has to put the extra effort to be sexy. Sexy woman is more livelier and more independence than the beautiful one. Out of the five dears above, those who like to be sexy are professional ladies who are daring and cunning as well. The one who is above 50 plus of age doesn't like to be sexy, she prefers to be interesting and attractive. Mmmmm something i am learning today. The other dear who wishes to be beautiful would not like to waste time. She is a committed secretary who lives by the soft approaches in life. See! Can't play play with beautiful woman.

As for me, i like all beautiful and sexy ladies because they make my world goes round. I love even more of ladies who have beautiful and sexy heart. They make all men fall for them.

Specially to all my dears out there: "If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning."

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

The Power of Forgiving.....


I am a fate healer while selling life insurance....

Today i had a chance to visit Hari who had just moved office. Upon seeing him, i could sense he wasn't a happy man. His eyes were sunken with black ring around, his mouth had bad breath and his body odour was heavy. Hari has been my client for twenty five years and definitely i could see the worries and unpleasantness in his face.

I put aside my sales and offered my patient ears to listen his story. According to him, he was cheated by his business partner whom he had trusted so much. Hari is much older than his younger partner whom he had groomed for the past five years. Lately through reliable sources, he found out that his half partner had siphoned countless projects to his outside interests and had unofficially taken fund out from their bank account. His trust was betrayed and it hurts his sincere heart. Though he knew all about his partner's wrong doings, he could not legally take action against him nor could he be able to recover those losses. Sadly he had been suffering in silence for the past couple of months.

Timely i came as a fate healer. Hari was too eager to seek my advices in order to rescue his unsolved problems. I told him..."A happy heart would see a beautiful world." As his heart is so sad and angry, the world looks ugly and uninteresting to him now. The fastest way to recoup is to inject immediate happiness to his injured heart. Since he could not be compensated and to recover his lost, be wise then....take this mistake as his learning experiences and challenges in life. There is this wisdom phrase which says, "Mistakes are our teachers." Lastly to apply this powerful proverb, "Forgive and Forget." The greatness of all successful people has the ability to forgive and to forget because by willingly to apply these two Fs, one will be able to feel happier and lighter in heart. Otherwise your mind would be loaded with anger and hatred, which might lead you to more frustration and tension.

Hari has two choices, one to remain angry and have an unhappy heart or be forgiving and have a lighter heart. Before i left, Hari shook my hand firmly and promised he would take my advices. I could see his eyes were lighted up with hopes already. And i was glad being his life insurance agent could fate heal him too.

This cannot be wrong -
"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you" ~ Lewis B. Smedes

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Are you proud to be a salesperson?


Am I proud to be a salesperson? Yes! Affirmative! I have been selling for almost 43 years and still enjoy every moment of it. I introduce myself as a life insurance agent or insurance salesman. Whereas all my fellow colleagues in my industry have big names, carrying titles like Consultant, Financial Planner, Agency Manager, District Director and the latest as Wealth Planner. The bottom line is, all of us have to sell our products.

Immaterial what products one is selling and marketing, you are selling yourself to make another person agrees with your thoughts. I have a friend who is selling a range of health food products, but he never likes to be called a salesperson. He insisted to be addressed as Net Worth Marketing Consultant. Unconsciously he reveals his low confidence and esteem in being a salesperson. Can't blame him because most people dislike salesmen rather than other professions. Perhaps he doesn't realise that everyone has to sell one way or another in our daily lives. As parents we have to sell our guidance to our children, as teachers they have to sell their teaching to their students and the boss has to sell himself to his employees for a better understanding.

Selling is to communicate effectively. Unless one is proud to admit himself as a salesperson, he might find it difficult to earn the respect from his clients and the surrounding. A skillful salesperson helps the buyers to understand their needs and wants. You might carry a super title in your name card but without the skill of selling, the title won't assist you to close the needed sales. Yes! I am glad that i am only a salesman, one that could sell almost anything on earth.

For all my fellow colleagues
- "Salesmanship, too, is an art; the perfection of its technique requires study and practice" - James Cash Penney

Monday, October 25, 2010

Are you a hot tempered person?


I was asked this question? How to deal with a hot tempered person? Though i am not a physiologist, i have much interest to observe and study people's behaviour, especially while selling life insurance.

To handle those children who are hot temper, i strongly recommend these three Golden Rules. They are Threat, Rewards and Love. I suggest to begin first on applying "love and rewards" to children who misbehaviour and always like throwing temper whenever they are angry. If the above two rules do not work, then you have to use "threat and fear" to suppress their violent and stubbornness. Be flexible and tolerance in these applications but at the same time, you have to be firm and serious in parenting these tough and emotional kids. With patience and concern, i am sure how hot temper a child is, the Golden Rules would definitely help.

However these Golden Rules do not apply on adults, whether is a man or a woman. From my working experiences, a hot tempered adult is usually a highly sex person. Their graft for love and sex is always greater than most normal person. Unless their desire is fully gratified and satisfied, their emotion is always imbalanced. In the Chinese version is called as imbalanced of the Yin & Yang.

The ancient Chinese subscribe to a concept called Yin Yang which is a belief that there exist two complementary forces in the universe. One is Yang which represents everything positive or masculine and the other is Yin which is characterized as negative or feminine. One is not better than the other. Instead they are both necessary and a balance of both is highly desirable.

This thinking is different from the duality of most religion where one state overcomes the other e.g. good over evil. In the concept of Yin Yang, too much of either one is bad. The ideal is a balance of both. The hot Saharan desert for example is an example of extreme Yang while the bitter cold Antarctica is extreme Yin. Neither is desirable.

Looks like the only way for a hot tempered person to be softened, he or she has to meet another compatible partner to satisfy their heavy appetite for love making. A fearful tiger could be tamed by a daring tigress and a hungry tigress could also be seduced by a wild tiger. So the next time you see a hot tempered person, you know he or she isn't sexually satisfied. Avoid them if you could, or if he or she is your partner, high time you should improve and show your prowess on bed. Otherwise he/she would always be an unhappy and angry person.

My strong belief -
"A sexually satisfied person is a happy person. People take pride in having a good, healthy sex life."

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Is My Time UP?

A Sunday Laugh...

A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.

Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"

God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth!

Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.

While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 43 years. Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"

God replied:

"I didn't recognize you!"
v
v
v


The Moral of the story is.............don't confuse God !

Saturday, October 23, 2010

The anti-rape female condom



You must read this...

This is so brilliant ! An anti-rape female condom invented by Sonette Ehlers…

A South African woman working as a blood technician with the South African Blood Transfusion Service, during which time she met and treated many rape victims.

The device, known as The Rape-aXe , is a latex sheath embedded with shafts of sharp, inward-facing microscopic barbs that would be worn by a woman in her vagina like a tampon. If an attacker were to attempt vaginal rape, their penis would enter the latex sheath and be snagged by the barbs, causing the attacker pain during withdrawal and (ideally) giving the victim time to escape.

The condom would remain attached to the attacker’s body when he withdrew and could only be removed surgically, which would alert hospital staff and police
. This device could assist in the identification and prosecution of rapists.

Andrea Dworkin said, "Seduction is often difficult to distinguish from rape. In seduction, the rapist often bothers to buy a bottle of wine."

Friday, October 22, 2010

The right ways to teach our childen.


My oldest grandson is already twelve this year. He is intelligence though but lack behaviour, especially towards his parents. They are staying afar from me and it's not easy for me to teach him. On this blog i like to share my view to my son, and hopefully he would take the initiative to correct his mistakes. Perhaps at the same time, all other younger parents might also benefit with this sharing.

There are three ways to teach our children. The first is by threat, when those days i would use the can to teach my children. Otherwise severe warning of any kind might work. Like cutting off allowances, taking away the computor and no any entertainment is allowed. Threat is like injecting fear if the children don't behave.

Second is incentives to motivate and inspire. Money is the prime mover. It works faster than all other gifts. Meaning rewards are to be given if the children are behaving and doing well.

The third is by the heart when loves and concern are willingly given to the growing kids. Love could be felt and concern is always appreciated. However it has got to be released with the fullest sincerity and honesty, otherwise it could back fire.

Sorry my son out there, you failed to educate your own son because you have over showered your kid with too much money and he knows you are scared of him by your guilty love imparted. As a responsible father you are working very hard to provide, but you have very little time spent with your growing and demanding son. Due to your challenging work which has to travel far and time consuming. By the time you reach home, you thought money and attention are good enough to make this youngster happy with you. See, your insincerity has back fired. What a pity son!

My recommendation before is too late. Please reduce your cash to him immediately. It causes more harm than good. Rewards are to be awarded if result is shown. Otherwise, threat could be the next replacement. No computor games until his behavious is improved. Your son's love languages are time and touches. If only you could spend more time with him, plus plenty of hugs and shoulder rubbing, he would definitely be a happier child. He is my grandson and i too love him so much. I strongly believe you would take dad's advices. I had done by part when you were a kid, and now it's your turn to groom your only son. Best of luck.

Specially to my sons
- "When a father gives to his son, both laugh; when a son gives to his father, both cry" - William Shakespeare

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Good Financial Management | Joke


A beggar to another beggar: I had a grand dinner at Taj yesterday.

How? The other beggar asked.

First beggar: Some one gave me a Rs 100/- note yesterday.

I went to Taj and ordered dinner worth Rs 1,000/-,

And enjoyed the dinner. When the bill came, I said, I had no money.

The Taj manager called the policeman, and handed me over to him.

I gave the Rs 100/- note to the police fellow, and he set me free.

A wonderful example of financial management indeed..

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Making Love.


Hi DengDeng, sorry did not add extra spices on yesterday title, "How to make love with a woman?" I was only telling you how to love a woman before making love with her. The last of my statement was the "happiest woman in my arm" and in order to reach this stage one has to be a good lover on bed as well too.

Don't doubt my age, coz i have a heart age of 35 by going to the gym quite very often. I work on the iron to gain my strength and run regularly to build my stamina. To be active and lasting on bed, i too have to train my physical. There is no short-cut, all sport men have to exercise and train themselves before going for their tournament. How to make love with a woman, i have to run marathon on bed while the woman yell and shout for mercy. At peak she has to hide and beg coz the thundering force is so pleasurable to avoid. Yes! Making love with a woman is not easy unless you know all the various steps and procedures to appease and satisfy her needs and desire. Finally if you want the woman to be in your arm willingly, master the Art of Making Love.

For further information, DengDeng... buy me a cup of coffee, more would be available for you.

This is interesting -
"Making love with a woman and sleeping with a woman are two separate passions, not merely different but opposite. Love does not make itself felt in the desire for copulation (a desire that extends to an infinite number of women) but in the desire for shared sleep (a desire limited to one woman)." — Milan Kundera

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

How to make love with a woman?


DengDeng is one of mine blog reader from Penang. He sent an email to me....

Hi Young Man,

Long time no see…. How you are? ;)
Wanna share this movie and you might sharing this interesting topic in ur blog….~~

How to Make Love to a Woman (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1241017/)

Hope to see how you comment on this topic… ;)
..................................................................................................

Good topic DengDeng. How to Make Love to a woman? It depends when it happens!!!

When i was a teenager, making love was never in my mind. If ever i had a chance to speak privately with a girl, that was a already a great achievement to me then. Came a day when i held the little finger of a sweet young thing, she immediately became my special girlfriend. Those were the days!

When i finished school and started to work early in life, making love to a woman was mainly because of sex. It was a straight forward game where no love or intimacy was involved. The show could last less than 5 minutes. Reason i knew nothing. The mind went wild and the heart beat like hell.

I became a young father in my early twenties. Making love to woman was like an obligation and duty. Day was to work and bring in the cash to feed the few mouths in the house. Nite was to distress and a short entertainment. Thinking back, i think i really did not know how to make love to any woman during this period of time while raising my family.

Now is different because all my children have grown to be father to themselves too. Making love to woman at this moment of time is an art to me, quite similar to selling. I prospect the right woman to fall in love. The woman with beauty of the heart is more important than her external beauty. My love comes with patience, kindness, no envy, no boastfulness, nor proud. I cannot be rude to the woman i love. I cannot be self seeking and easily angered to her. I will always have high hopes and always perseveres toward her. Because i believe true love never fails. With this confidence in my mind, i know my woman will certainly give in to my approaches and accept me whole heartily. Unless i am prepared to honour all the above givings, i don't think i would make love with any woman. If i do, i am certain the woman i make love with, will be the happiest woman in my arm.

Hey! DengDeng what do you think?

Something you must remember
- "You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her"

Monday, October 18, 2010

Parental Love


How i wish this letter was given to my children when they were still under my care. Nevertheless i hope they won't mind reading it today although they are already father of their own children now. Perhaps all other fathers could still benefit from this sharing. Please read on...

Following is a letter to his son from a renown Hong Kong TV broadcaster cum Child Psychologist. The words are actually applicable to all of us, young or old, children or parents.!

My Son:I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons.

Life is unpredictable, nobody knows how long he lives. Some words are better said early. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.

What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps could save you a lot of unnecessary heartache. Remember the following as you go through life..

1.Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I. To those who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every move. When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.

2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess. Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose what/who you love most.

3.Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better you enjoy life.

4.Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time and with one's mood. If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.

5.A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does not mean that you can be successful by not studying hard! Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags to riches, but one has to start from some rags!

6.I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, either would I financially support your whole life. My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up. After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or in your limousine, whether rich or poor.

7.You honour your words, but don't expect others to be so. You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.

8.I have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but I never strike any prize. That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard! There is no free lunch!

9.No matter how much time I have with you, let's treasure the time we have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life.

Your Dad

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Maid who does the extra for her master.


A small girl walks-in while her father is dressing in the bedroom. She looks at his privates and points at his thing and asks "Dad what’s that thing between your legs?" Dad replies "I don't know".

She goes to kitchen and finds her mum, "Mom what is that long thing between dad's legs?" The mom instead of explaining things to her she replies "I don't know."

A week later when the mom was coming from work the little girl runs to her and says, "Mom you refused to tell me the name of that thing between dad's legs. I have finally figured it out on my own IT'S A TOOTHBRUSH(".)

The mom laughs then asks her, "How do u know that?" The girl explains "....when I came back from pre-school this morning I saw the maid kneeling in front of dad, brushing her teeth with dad's toothbrush and sure enough there was TOOTHPASTE in her mouth.

Mom Fainted...loooooo

Saturday, October 16, 2010

How do u know you are a likeable person?


How do you know you are a likeable and lovable person. If you are not sure, please try my fun way to determine yourself. Send out this message, "If you don't hear from me tomorrow what is the one thing you remember of me?" ... to ten and more of your friends and relatives.

I just did. I was amazed and over joyed to be told i am cheeky and naughty to many of my friends, including my eldest son who said i am a cheeky naughty dad and my daughter in law said i am fun loving & philosophical to her. All replied with a positive character of me. Their admiration really inspired and for sure i know i am a likeable person to everyone.

What about you there? Won't you like to try! Perhaps you might know better of yourself when they respond. The truth would be reviewed. With the feedback, you can capitalize your strength and correct your mistakes if you have. Best of luck to all my readers.

Food for thought - "Happy people learn that happiness, like sweat, is a by-product of activity -Frank Pittman III

Friday, October 15, 2010

Wife's Power


Selling tips...

After many years of selling, i have to know the authority of a home. Most people thought husband is the decider for a family. Not true! The world has changed, when women are more powerful and have more says in our society. A good salesperson has to sense whether The King or The Queen is in control. The Queen could give a slim excuse to refer to the The King first for not concluding a sale, but in actual fact she is the one who could decide. So if you could spend more time to butter her, the chances to close the sales is much easier.

One of my female client whom i had discussed with our plans recently sent me a short message. She wrote, "Dear Mr Foo, haven't got time to talk to my husband. Will discuss with him this weekend. Thx:)."

My reply, "Pls... He is the Master of the house but when the wife says Yes.. I am sure he would also say Yes... Right my dear."

Later of the week, the entire family signed those papers with me without the husband presence. Why? Because she is The Queen who controls.

The power of woman - "Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it" - Lyndon Johnson.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Successful people make prompt decision


Selling tips...

In any selling approaches, most potential customers seldom conclude with a final decision. Undecided the common answers might be; let me think about it ( believe me they don't, once they are back they forget everything we have explained ), or have to discuss with my spouse ( easy way out to escape from the sale ), or would let you know tomorrow ( delay tactic ).

The best way to overcome this short fall is here. Try this! "All successful people make prompt decision. A 'Yes' or a 'No' is a decision. The in-between isn't a decision. Example: When two planes are heading on a direct collision, a good pilot has to make a split second decision to avoid the crash and impact. He cannot afford to delay. Either he has to dive or turn right or left. Mr Prospect being that you are a successful person, i am sure you can make the rightful decision now."

Believe me, i had closed most sales through this simple explanation and it works beautifully all the time. If it doesn't work, i would buy you a coffee. Deal?

Food for thought - It's better to be boldly decisive and risk being wrong than to agonize at length and be right too late.”

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

The Best Tattoo

Ah Fei is one of my brother of different mother and father. I am a Chinese and he is a Malay. I like his style because he is equally as naughty as i am. This early morning, he sent over a message which said, "Something to ponder. U like it shaven or bushy?"

I understood his dirty mind. Replying him i wrote, "For admiration i like shaven but for excitement i love bushy more. What say u brother?"

Without hesitating he responded, "U like it bushy! U know how long it can grow, or may be trimmed one? I like it shaven/trimmed, easy for my tongue to xplore down there and won't get hair stuck at tooth."

He almost choked me while i was having my breakfast coffee. Yes! Everyone thinks and acts differently. Brother, please read the below contents and see whether you could understand the different of hair over tatoo.

This man had what he thought was the best tattoo in the world...

Until he went to prison!!!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Have you found your soul mate?


A Gmail Chat with Deepa....


deepa: hello handsome
me: hi my sweet
deepa: how are you??
me: on top of the world because chatting with you my dear
deepa: he he he how is your little sweet heart how is life going on??
deepa: life is so far good Robert
me: she loves me even more....life is like heaven...wondering why the world is complaining
deepa: coz they couldn't find their soul mate yet
me: God have created one each for everyone on earth...jst that you have to look for her or him
deepa: yes

.......................................................

Deepa is one of my admirable blog reader from India. I hope she has found her soul mate who will make her life complete. The saying... "A Happy Heart Sees A beautiful World."

Monday, October 11, 2010

Not all doctors are ethical.


Chun Wen's mother was worried because her son has a slight swelling on his right neck below the ear. Insisting that he has to seek a specialist, they visited a nearby hospital for an ENT consultation. Upon seeing the doctor, mother and son became even more concern. Because doctor suggested the son has to be admitted on Monday soonest, biopsy and possible surgery to be done to remove the node. The attending doctor almost forced them to register the admission immediately.

Out of panic, the mother called me on phone to take my advice whether to go ahead of the surgery. Luckily she called. I told her to gently tell the doctor there that they needed to consult the father first. Meanwhile to go to another hospital to seek another opinion. A second opinion could be the decider.

On seeing another ENT specialist later, Chun Wen was only given some medication and no treatment was necessary. The diagnosis was swollen lymph node or throat infection. They felt more relieve after attended by this doctor.

See! Different doctors have different approaches. Some like threat by adding fear over your sickness. The ethical one would be more frank and sincere. Question: How would we know which doctor is telling the truth. My experiences from my medical selling is... A Good doctor always offers various options before surgery is required. Don't tell you are insured with medical insurance first, even if hospital or doctor ask. Reason: They abuse the right of insurance and it doesn't benefit the patients.

Chun Wen & his entire family are my clients. Looks like they take my advices more than the doctors. I am sure the son would recover soon and Thanks God, he doesn't need to be moved into the operation theatre after all. Doctor and hospital must be angry with me now. Har Har!!!

My strong belief in ethics - “Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity.” - W. Clement Stone quotes

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Ten Ten Ten!!!




It's a ten ten ten day. Today is the 10th October 2010 and it's a very significant day. Something interesting about October 2010: This Oct has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays, all in one month. It happens once in 823 years when i wish you could come back to read my blog again. Okay? For being a good reader today, i share another naughty story with you. Read on...


A couple take in an 18-year-old girl as a lodger. She asked if she could have a bath but the woman of the house told her they didn't have a bath tub but if she wanted to she could use a tin bath in front of the fire......

"Monday's the best night, when my husband goes out to darts," she said.

The girl agreed to have a bath the following Monday....

After her husband had gone to the pub for his darts match, the woman filled the bath and watched the girl get undressed. She was surprised to see that the lass didn't have any pubic hair. She mentioned this to her husband when he came home. He didn't believe her, so she said: "Next Monday, don't go to darts. I'll leave a gap in the curtains so that you can see for yourself.."

So the following Monday, while the girl again got undressed, the wife asked: "Do you shave?"

"No," replied the girl. "I've just never grown any hairs down there. Do you have hair?"

"Oh, yes," said the woman, and she showed off her hairy muff.

When the girl went to bed the husband came in, and the wife asked: "Did you see it?"

"Yes," he said, "but why the hell did you have to show her yours."

"Why not?" she said. "You've seen it before."

"I know," he said, "but the darts team hadn't!!"

Note: please don't be angry because today is ten ten ten.

Saturday, October 09, 2010

Never underestimate the weak.


Take a break....


A pastor concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed.

So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church.

Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.

The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some bibles. But he had serious doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had always kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor Louis stuttered badly. But, NOT WANTING TO discourage Louis, the minister decided to let him try anyway.

He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars stacked with bibles. He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.

Anxious to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately asked Jack, 'Well, Jack, how did you make out selling our bibles last week?'

Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Jack replied, 'Using my sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 bibles, and here' S the $200 I collected on behalf of the church.'

'Fine job, Jack!' The minister said, vigorously shaking his hand. 'You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you.'

Turning to Paul, 'And Paul, how many bibles did you sell for the Church last week?'

Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, 'I am a professional salesman. I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the church, and here's $280 I collected.'

The minister responded, 'That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a professional salesman and the church is indebted to you.'

Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said, 'And Louie, did you manage to sell any bibles last week?' Louie silently offered the minister a large envelope.

The minister opened it and counted the contents. 'What is this?' the minister exclaimed. 'Louie, there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 bibles for the church, door to door, in just one week?'

Louie just nodded. 'That's impossible!' both Jack and Paul said in unison. 'We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many bibles as we could.'

'Yes, this does seem unlikely,' the minister! agreed. 'I think you'd better explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie.'

Louie shrugged. 'I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn--know f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure,' he stammered.

Impatiently, Peter interrupted. 'For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!'

'A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was,' Louis replied, 'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this B-B-B-B-bible f-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to y-y-you??'


Moral of the story: Never underestimate the weak.

Friday, October 08, 2010

Self-confidence


An inspiring story to share...

The business executive was deep in debt and could see no way out. Creditors were closing in on him. Suppliers were demanding payment. He sat on the park bench, head in hands, wondering if anything could save his company from bankruptcy.

Suddenly an old man appeared before him. "I can see that something is troubling you," he said. After listening to the executive's woes, the old man said, "I believe I can help you."

He asked the man his name, wrote out a check, and pushed it into his hand saying, "Take this money. Meet me here exactly one year from today, and you can pay me back at that time." The business executive saw in his hand a check for $500,000, signed by John D. Rockefeller, then one of the richest men in the world!

"I can erase my money worries in an instant!" he realized. But instead, the executive decided to put the un-cashed check in his safe. Just knowing it was there might give him the strength to work out a way to save his business, he thought.

With renewed optimism, he negotiated better deals and extended terms of payment. He closed several big sales. Within a few months, he was out of debt and making money once again.

One year later, he returned to the park with the un-cashed check. At the agreed-upon time, the old man appeared. But just as the executive was about to hand back the check and share his success story, a nurse came running up and grabbed the old man.

"I'm so glad I caught him!" she cried. "I hope he hasn't been bothering you. He's always escaping from the home and telling people he's John D. Rockefeller."And she led the old man away.

The astonished executive just stood there, stunned. All year long he'd been wheeling and dealing, buying and selling, convinced he had half a million dollars behind him.

Suddenly, he realized that it wasn't the money that had turned his life around. It was his newfound self-confidence that gave him the power to achieve anything he went after.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have found my self-confidence. What about you?

Food for thought
- “Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.” - Mark Victor Hansen quotes

Thursday, October 07, 2010

Smallest muscle in the human body.


I always like starting the day with fun and humour. The best way is to disturb and reach up to friends around. I sent out this message to some selected friends. I wrote, "Testing your general knowledge this morning. What is the smallest muscle in the human body? Correct answer buy u a coffee or a kiss would be given."

Shortly came the first sms written, "Cock...Hehe!!"

I told him, "U have a dirty head. This muscle is even smaller than your little brother."

Came an unintelligent answer, "Face?" Face isn't the smallest muscle lah. She gave up quite easily. "Then you tell me and i need to buy u coffee then." See! i had earned a free round of coffee when i next meet this person.

Another naughty reply, "Should be our most sensible part la, ie little pussy and the big gun!" I reminded this person, this muscle is even smaller than pussy or dicky. Continuation, "Why i said that, it is because that's the most dangerous parts & it gives wheck! wheck! oh! oh! yee! yee!"

I told them all i will write the answer on my blog today. Each of them have to buy me a coffee or the ladies have to give me a tight hug plus a kiss on my lip. Well! That's interesting isn't it?

The human body has about 650 muscles—we say “about” because there is some disagreement as to which muscles are separate and that results in different muscle totals.

Although the experts don’t agree on how many muscles there are in the human body, they do agree that the smallest muscle is the stapedius. Located in the middle ear, the stapedius is a mere 1.27 millimetres long. And what does such a minuscule muscle do? It controls the tiniest bone in the body, the stapes or stirrup bone. The stapes and two other bones conduct sound vibrations through the middle ear.

So! Stapedius is the smallest muscle. The next smallest muscle with the most strength and force is the tongue. You know why? One little touch on the right G-spot, it could lift both legs of either a man or a woman. And when both different tongue touches each other, it creates sensation beyond your imagination. Stapedious could be considered smallest but it would not have the greatness of the tongue. Don't believe, please try it yourself.

How true - "All parts of the human body get tired eventually - except the tongue" - Konrad Adenauer.

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Sincere appreciation.


A typical housewife turns full time business isn't going to be easy! Madam x lost her husband a few years back and her only son met an accident a year ago passed away too. The family left her a sizable sundry shop to manage. Without choice she has to take care of it alone, so that she could move on her life with another young daughter. The entire family happened to be my clients.

There are a lot of hardship and obstacles facing Madam x in the shop. Every time when i visited her, she used to complain and drew her sorrow over her business problems. Though she had intention to giving up the business several times, i managed to motivate her to stay. According to her, the most difficult task is to get along with the several working staffs in the shop. She would be complaining the workers were over jealous of her instant wealth after her husband's death, and many of them were not prepared to take her instruction as a boss. The feedback from the workers, they were unhappy with her bossy attitude and behaviour. To me is like 'chicken and egg's story'.

With much stress the lady boss seek my brotherly advices and assistance to remedy the worsening relationship between workers and employer. As a closed friend i have to be direct with her. This was what i told her... Please forget your role as a housewife. You are no longer one anymore but as a business lady from today. A housewife takes charge of a home. She can nag and nag all day long or shout and yell to get the attention from her family members. Not a business person! A good boss has to do things right for her workers, so that they are willing to work. You have three options to apply on the employees. First option is to use threat and warning. Meaning, sack those who are not performing. Or second option is to raise salary for immediate result from workers. Or the last option is to offer sincere love, care and concern. I suggested the last option as ideal and most applicable.

I didn't know my suggestion motivated the lady boss. The next day she had a short briefing with the staffs. She spoke with her heart these words..."I am sorry for not being an understanding boss. Please forgive my wrong doing in the recent past. If i had hurt your feeling in anyway, please accept my sincere apologises. Please help me to run our shop together. I know you have been good and dedicated workers. Lets forget the past wrongs and work ahead to see the success of our business." Some of them cried while listening. They felt so touched and promised they would do their level best.

Conclusion: Love always has magic whenever we are willing to give. Sometimes all we need is a little appreciation. At the same time, let us not forget to appreciate others around us.

Food for thought - "At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us" - Albert Schweitzer

Tuesday, October 05, 2010

What happen if u strike the millions jackpot?


What happen if you strike rich overnight?

Few days back in our local news, a businessman and his wife did not sleep a wink on Tuesday night. You wouldn't too, if you found out that you had won RM47.82 million. The winner, in his 50s, learnt of his win from the lottery website hours after the draw. Disbelievingly, he got his wife to repeatedly verify that he actually had the winning numbers before they were satisfied beyond doubt. The overjoyed couple said they stayed awake the whole night in anticipation of claiming the price money.

So! They would bring home this money soon. What happen then? Of course their entire lifestyle would be changed. What about their character and personality? Would they be as humble and kind as when they were poor? Would they be boastful and arrogance when wealth is in their hand. Sometime i really ponder! No money could be sad and too much money is scary.

The paper said this couple will donate part of the jackpot to charity as they could not use all the money on their own. They said the money would definitely benefit many people around them, especially their siblings who were not financially stable. They have also decided to help other people who are "in desperate need of financial assistance."

Sounds great to see this charitable couple who seems to have a rich heart as well. Whether is true has to be seen because their jackpot hasn't been released to them yet.

Food for thought - "Charity is a virtue of the heart, and not of the hands" - Author: Joseph Addison

Monday, October 04, 2010

Parent's Favorite Poster.



The above poster was copied and pasted from my son, Alvin's blog, Mobchina.blogspot.com under his recent title, Parent's Favorite Poster.

Sounded brilliant he said. Yes! Might be brilliant to you son but all my three children when they were teenagers were never tired of being harassed by the Stupid Parents. Mum was nagging and dad was using the cane, those naughty sons were still happy staying with us. Alvin being the eldest taught the younger brothers to play tricks with us. When the parents were on holidays, you stole my car and went wild with your girlfriends. Don't forget, you were still under age then. Though you guys were mischievous and playful, dad could be upset but it was really joy and nice to have you all around us. Never was in my mind, that i wanted to throw you away or insisted that you had to move out in our warm house. I love Alvin who is intelligent and smart, Baldwin is caring and obedient, and Caldwin is loving and cute. I named all my son with A, B and C , thinking i could end at Z, but by the time i reached C, you guys really made me worried. Because raising sons were never easy.

Alah! Time flew so fast. By the time, i thought i could relax and spend more time with my grown up children, two are taken away from me by two aggressive women. These ladies have more influences and authorities than me now because they happened to be their loved wives. Alvin & Baldwin have moved out from my home not harassed by the parents. But rather by two attractive wives of them. What a joke!!! Am i happy now? Yes! Now i don't have to be responsible to them anymore. I have to thanks Fionne and Chee Ying, their wives to replace my fatherly roles. Ah! Forgotten that i still have Caldwin who is unmarried yet, who is staying with me currently. Wondering when is his turn to be harassed by another woman to move out from us!!!

Specially for my sons - "In the final analysis it is not what you do for your children but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings." - Ann Landers

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Clean Naughty Joke.


A Sunday Laugh....

A blonde went into a world wide message centre to send a message to her mother overseas.

When the man told her it would cost $300, she exclaimed: "I don't have any money." But I'd do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother."

The man arched an eyebrow (as we would expect).

"Anything?" he asked.

"Yes, yes, anything" the blonde promised.

Well, then, "Just follow me" said the man as he walked towards the next room. The blonde did as she was told and followed the man." Come in and close the door" the man said.

She did.

He then said "Now get on your knees."

She did.

"Now take down my zipper."

She did.

"Now go ahead ... Take it out....." He said.

She reached in and grabbed it with both hands .

Then paused.

The man closed his eyes and whispered ..

"Well ... Go ahead."

The blonde slowly brought her mouth closer to it and while holding it close to her lips, .... tentatively said ....

"Hello. Mum, can you hear me?"

Saturday, October 02, 2010

Wedding Blues:


A newly married Husband saved his wife's number on his mobile as "MY LIFE";

After one year of marriage, it was found changed to "MY WIFE";

After Five years of Marriage: "HOME"

and after Ten Years "LADY HITLER"

and after Silver Anniversary "WRONG NUMBER" ...

Food for thought - "A perfect wife is one who doesn't expect a perfect husband" - Author Unknown

Friday, October 01, 2010

Indian wisdom.. Hide your face.


An American, an Englishman and an Indian went for a hike one day. It was very hot. They were sweating and exhausted. When they came upon a small lake, they took off all their clothes and jumped into the water since it was fairly secluded.

Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their "freedom". As they were crossing an open area, suddenly a group of ladies from town appeared. Unable to get to their clothes in time, the American and the Englishman quickly used their hands to cover their privates. But the Indian covered his face while they ran for cover.

After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on, the American and the Englishman asked the Indian why he covered his Face rather than his private parts.

The Indian replied, "I don't know about you, but in my country, it's the face that people recognize."

Just for a laugh - "In times of difficulties. Don't ever say "GOD I have a problem". But instead "Hey problem I have a big GOD" and everything will be alright........"

Mental & Heart Pain.


In the course of selling life insurance, i had encountered countless friends and clients who were suffering pain in many ways. The most common pain is physical pain. I mean body pain like back pain or leg pain or shoulder pain due to all types of health reasons. One effective way to relieve these pains, i usually recommend to apply is this Analgesic Balm called 'Counterpain'. It works wonders, relieving muscular aches and pain almost instantly. It could be purchased in all pharmacist and manufactured in Thailand. Cheap and available.

As an agent i helped to heal their external pain in some ways by medicine. The only pain which Counterpain couldn't solve is mental and heart pain. Mental pain is due to work, financial, family or social problem. I had to use my patience ears to listen and to understand their emotional pain. With time and some understanding, nothing is impossible to resolve, i always had some solutions and advices to overcome their mental pain. Don't believe, please try on me.

The only pain, i think is difficult to solve is heart pain. I am not referring to heart diseases because that is the job of the doctor. The greatest heart pain is love pain when one is suffering from lovesick. There is no treatment or drug to remedy this unexplainable sorrow. It hurts tremendously. Please avoid it at all costs. The only advice i could offer is...'forgive and forget'. Perhaps then the heart might feel better.

Food for thought - “I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love” - Mother Teresa quotes