Friday, October 22, 2010

The right ways to teach our childen.


My oldest grandson is already twelve this year. He is intelligence though but lack behaviour, especially towards his parents. They are staying afar from me and it's not easy for me to teach him. On this blog i like to share my view to my son, and hopefully he would take the initiative to correct his mistakes. Perhaps at the same time, all other younger parents might also benefit with this sharing.

There are three ways to teach our children. The first is by threat, when those days i would use the can to teach my children. Otherwise severe warning of any kind might work. Like cutting off allowances, taking away the computor and no any entertainment is allowed. Threat is like injecting fear if the children don't behave.

Second is incentives to motivate and inspire. Money is the prime mover. It works faster than all other gifts. Meaning rewards are to be given if the children are behaving and doing well.

The third is by the heart when loves and concern are willingly given to the growing kids. Love could be felt and concern is always appreciated. However it has got to be released with the fullest sincerity and honesty, otherwise it could back fire.

Sorry my son out there, you failed to educate your own son because you have over showered your kid with too much money and he knows you are scared of him by your guilty love imparted. As a responsible father you are working very hard to provide, but you have very little time spent with your growing and demanding son. Due to your challenging work which has to travel far and time consuming. By the time you reach home, you thought money and attention are good enough to make this youngster happy with you. See, your insincerity has back fired. What a pity son!

My recommendation before is too late. Please reduce your cash to him immediately. It causes more harm than good. Rewards are to be awarded if result is shown. Otherwise, threat could be the next replacement. No computor games until his behavious is improved. Your son's love languages are time and touches. If only you could spend more time with him, plus plenty of hugs and shoulder rubbing, he would definitely be a happier child. He is my grandson and i too love him so much. I strongly believe you would take dad's advices. I had done by part when you were a kid, and now it's your turn to groom your only son. Best of luck.

Specially to my sons
- "When a father gives to his son, both laugh; when a son gives to his father, both cry" - William Shakespeare

1 comment:

Alvin Foo said...

thanks for the good advices. Brandon is certainly a real challenge and definitely not easy to manage. Perhaps i didnt try hard enough or just dont have the courage to threaten or cane him. I dont see him enough to earn his love and affection thus most times had resolved to wrong methods to bring him closer to me. I should take your advise and perhaps speak to debbie to see how we can use stronger message to improve his attitude and behavior.

Thanks dad for your thoughtfulness and wisdom.

Alvin