Are u a playboy or payboy?

Relax on a Sunday with some cheekiness.

Chin is happily married with two children. He travels all over Asia for business and he loves woman. I asked him recently, "Chin, are you a playboy?" He smiled and replied, "No! I am not playboy but a payboy." Something I learned from a much younger man. A playboy has many girlfriends who stick with him. Whereas a payboy, pays his women once and gets himself release. Chin asked me, "What am I?" I told him, I am not good to be a playboy, neither I like to be a payboy. I like to be a passionate boy to the one I love most, who is reading my blog now.

From a SYT I learned. A soulmate isn't complete, if they are not checkmates to themselves. Understanding and loving each other isn't enough. Soulmate needs to check, recheck and uncheck as often as possible to bond the grow of sex excitement within themselves. Many lovers fail in their love relationship, because they don't apply the checking system on the credit and balance of love & sex needs. Have to remind little darling to be checkmate as well.

Food for the thought - "One way to open your eyes is to ask yourself, what if I had never seen this before? What if I knew I would never see it again?" - Rachel Carson

Help me! Love sick I am.

Kevin is a friendly and a committed floor supervisor who works in a Japanese restaurant. Me and my little darling love to dine at this place. More so of Kevin, because he knows how to serve and care for all his customers. Last night when we were there, we noticed Kevin wasn't smiling. His hair was untidy and his eyes were dull. We asked, "Kevin something isn't good on you. What happen?"

Kevin replied, "Robert, i am surprised you can see. I had broke off with my girlfriend and love sick i am. Can you help?" I shook my head, "Since when? How young are you and your girlfriend? How long is your relationship with her?"

According to Kelvin, his girl friend left him since a month ago. They were staying together for more than three years. She is only 20 and he is 23 currently. There is no third party involved here.

Looking at my little darling, I said,"Sweetheart, if for some reasons I had angered you and you leave me. Tell me! What is the best and ideal way to win you back again?"

Little darling was sharp to know my intention. She replied, "Darling, if that happened, you have to be thick skin, take away your pride and self esteem, and keep coming back to me. I may not accept you totally but you should try to reach me as a friend first. You have to start all over again to win my confidence and trust. You have to give me more yeses than before. You have to give me more attention and concern. If you do that my love, I would surrender to you one more time."

Kevin was listening and he knew it was meant for him. I continued, "That is the first option from an intelligent lady here. You should do it accordingly. As a friendly advice, don't just stick to one girl friend. You are still very young, when you should know more friends. This is not the right time to fall in love. You should concentrate more on your career and learning of life. Take your present love mistake as a learning process. The next time when you have found another love, you will be a better and more an understanding man to hold your love and romance. I was like you, when I had made plunders and had caused miseries. Thanks God! Today I am ready to love my little darling the way it should be."

I sincerely hope this true story had enlightened Kevin. At the same time allowing my readers to know, this could happen to anyone of us.

Some meaningful proverbs I had gathered - "Marry a man/woman you love to talk to" & "When you say 'I Love You' mean it" & "Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but its the only way to live life completely."

Life insurance is a perpetual need.

Someone asked when I am going to stop selling insurance. Sorry! I am not selling insurance but rather selling life insurance is a hobby to me. Talking is my interest and this hobby allows me to continue talking and communicating with the world as long as i remain here. Life insurance is a perpetual product. As long as there are lives or as long as human being still in existence, life insurance will be needed. Lives have uncertainties and are unpredictable. Nothing is certain but death is. And along the way before it happen, we have to face the challenges of ill health and accidents. As human being is created with emotion and feeling, love is part of our lives. So! As long as there is love in this world, the need for life insurance is there. You can't stop from dying but you could create a fund from life insurance to benefit the one you love most while you are alive. I will never trade my career for another product because i strongly believe life insurance is the most beautiful creation specially tailor for mankind. Thanks God! I am a life insurance agent.

Food for the thought - "I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It's there all the time" - Anna Freud.

The mental & physical world.

A sweet young thing asked, "When i accomplish anything in the mental world, its done in the physical world. It is true?"

To make her understands easier, i use the magic of love. If her boyfriend had not prepared to love her by affection, passion, patience, tolerance, truthfulness, kindness, care, understanding, motivation and encouragement, he won't have won her heart. All these actions are considered as mental power and emotion which could be felt and sensed by her. In turn his mental vibration allows his gain of her physical love. Her beauty and attractiveness could be sighted in the physical form. Without her physical beauty, the man might find difficult to gain his mental thought.

Similarly if one has the right mental attitude and strength, that person stands a chance to have all physical possession in this world. Physical could be seen and touched. Mental could only be felt and sensed. You need to see and touch before you could get excited to feel and sense. So it is true if SYT could accomplish her skill to have a right mental attitude, she will be successful in this physical world of sight and touch. I hope my short explanation could enlighten her. Whether she believes or not, the final decision is still hers!

Food of the heart - "Be content with want you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you" - Lao Tzu

Champion has to be trained.

The greatest show on earth was the recent Beijing Olympic Games. The closing ceremony was magnificently presented to the world audience. Although i am not a keen sportsman, i was impressed by first the Jamaica's Usain for clocking an unbelievable time of 9.69 seconds for the 100 meter sprint. Making him currently the fastest man on planet earth. On the last day, Samuel Wanjiru completed the marathon run with an Olympic record time of 2'06:32. It was indeed a fantastic sport of great determination and drive. For all these champions to reach this far, i am sure they must had put in a lot of training and practices. They had to develop their stamina and built their strength. Their attitude had to be right and their self motivation had to be strong.

I believe all exercises have to be trained in order to be good at them. Including bed exercise. Those who are inexperienced or weak, might complete the run on bed as 100 meter sprint. The show ends without even clocking 10 seconds. Making the other partner hanging and be frustrated. Such players should invoke for advices. My suggestions are, you need to run more to develop your heart stamina. Go often to the gym to build your muscle for strength. With the combination of stamina and strength, your body should be able to run further on bed. With a little patience and experience, your 100 meter sprint could be extended to 10,000 meter race. I prefer to take the marathon run and that is when my little darling sometimes complained.

Food for the thought - "I hated every minute of training, but i said Don't Quit. Suffer Now and live the rest of your time as a champion" - Muhammad Ali

Jealousy of man.

I wonder this is true!

Man has always drawn to the attractiveness of woman. We love to admire their beauty, sexiness, intelligence and charm. Some are so gorgeous with their fantastic look, men could easily fall for them. Especially those who are brave to dress loosely and radiantly. Their seducing body shape could trickle our mind with temptation. The funny part of life is, men like to see attractive women they do not know without jealousy. But the women they love, they would be jealous when other men are looking at them. Meaning, you can see others but others can't see yours!

I think there are few types of man who behave differently. The first type is, he likes to look at beautiful ladies but he doesn't allow his woman to be beautiful when she goes out. The jealousy is extremely high here. The second type is, he also like to admire other beauties but he only allows his woman to dress beautifully when he is with her. Perhaps he feels proud he has a beautiful lady. The third type is those who totally trust his woman. He feels honour to have such dazzlingly beautiful lady. No restriction is set. He wants the whole world to admire his woman. I am the third type of man. I believe my little darling knows what is best for her. She knows how to carry herself in all situations with or without my presence. Jealousy is to the minimum.

So for the men! Be careful when you are looking at other women because there are men who might be jealous with your admiration. For the ladies! Why bother with us? Just dress whatever you like and make yourself as attractive as possible because women are to be admired after all.

A Greek proverb written - "wonder is the beginning of wisdom."

Mine is hers & hers is hers.

A little joke for a Sunday.

In the course of selling life insurance, I learned the different of how man and woman treat each other financially. In most cases, what belongs to the man, have to be shared. What belongs to the woman, remain with her. Sometimes they share within themselves. In typical cases, what is his is his and what is hers is hers. However my tag line to my little darling is; "what is mine is hers but what is hers is always hers." I believe most ladies love this statement. Not forgetting women are here to be loved and pampered by men.

"What is mine is hers but what is hers is always hers." Have to ask little darling, what happen if she is pregnant, is the baby mine or hers? If is yes, then this tag line is correct. Or if not when the baby has to be shared, then the tag line needs to be changed.

Food for the thought - "The secret of life is honesty & fair dealing. If you can fade that, you've got it made" - Groncho Max (1890-1977)

Focus leads to success.

Selling Tips:

Most of my clients like to deal business with me because they know I am 100% a Life Insurance Person. My main source of income is from insurance and I don't involve in any other business. Although the early path was difficult during these twenty six years, I did not fade from my career. There were many other tempting opportunities during this period, but they never influence my heart and mind to deviate. I have always being faithful and royal to one principle company since started. I had learned and relearned on my work. I had served four CE Os of my company and had seen countless agents, staffs and directors resigned or retired. Knowing my job isn't enough but to love and have passion on it is even more important. I consider myself as a true professional specialising in insurance. Each time I close a case, I promise I will deliver, no matter what happen. My total commitment leads me to full trust with all my clients. My work is much simpler today, when most of my prospects and clients don't doubt my words any longer.

How I wish, everyone could just specialise in one field or profession to make a living. Things would be much easier and less complicated. When I am sick, I have my personal doctor who knows me well. I have a full time tax manager to handle my account. An efficient lawyer to advise my legal matters when needed. A qualified motor technician to serve my cars. They only specialise in one trade to make a decent living. And I am their simple life insurance agent to them. We trust each other on our work that matters.

What about you? Are you focus? Do you know what you really want? If you want to succeed in selling, just be honest with one particular product and remain faithfully with one company which offers you the opportunity. The rest, time will tell.

Food for the thought - "Your greatest asset is your earning ability. Your greatest resource is your time" - Brian Tracy.

Close with a gentle touch.

Selling tips:

A sale isn't a sale, unless is closed. Many fail to close a sale because they do not know when to close a sale. Certainly you don't expect a prospect to tell you he wants to buy. An experienced salesperson could identify and detect the buying signals. I relate these buying signals are quite similar to love and affectionate signals.

Example: A man has spent much effort to court his lady. She admires and appreciates his attempt. She enjoys and feels happy with his care. Hidden in her heart, she loves the loving man. Nevertheless, she is afraid and shy to reveal her feeling. As long as the man doesn't declare his love for her, both will never know that they love each other. Come on man! If you have the guts and passion, you should be able to feel and sense she has the interest over you. Hug her and kiss her! If she accepts your approach, it concludes she loves you then.

Selling and closing is the same. Your prospects will never admit they have surrendered to your approach but you have to hug and tenderly grab their hands to sign on the dotted line. Close with a gentle touch, be it in love or sales.

Food for the thought - "In a time of crisis we all have the potential to morph up to a new level and do things we never thought possible" - Stuart Wilde.

Financial reserve builds personal confidence.

Selling Tips.

Financial confidence is the key role to success. But how much is enough to be successful. The thousand is peanuts to the rich but to the poor is wealth. I can't sell life insurance to make my clients rich but I help them to build financial independence and confidence.

There is a saying, "the rich gets richer" & "the poor gets poorer." The logic is simply the rich has the financial reserves to feel confidence. The confidence develops courage and braveness in them. In turn they dare to venture into more opportunities if they ever arise. Not the poor. They live by the days and have no saving. They lack personal confidence because their lives are uncertain and unsure. They are always blind by opportunities coz they are too afraid to look at them.

The fastest and easier way to develop strong financial confidence is to save six months of your earning. If you are earning 1000 dollars a month, you need 6000 dollars as a standby reserve. Or if you earn 10,000 dollars, your saving should be at 60,000 dollars. Once you have that minimum reserve in your account, your personal perception of life changes. You tend to be brave, you speak with strength and confidence and you look smarter. Your reserve builds financial confidence in your personality. You stand tall among your peers and you have better opportunity in lives. Although your saving is only six months of your income, it has the miracle power to let you feel wonderful just like the rich. The only way to prove my point is, save first of these six months of your current income and see whether I wrote is true.

I don't just sell life insurance to offer financial independence from the policy covers, I encourage all my clients to save to gain financial confidence. Nobody wants to die, rather they want to be rich when they are still alive. The first step is, if they are not rich yet, please take my advice to save the six months income.

My belief - "The successful has more saving than the not so successful one."

Can we measure kindness?

Are you a kind person? Nobody knows except yourself. You can pretend to be kind or sincerely you are kind. The truth is within your heart and mind.

A beggar with only one hand was approaching many seated customers in a coffee shop for alms. Each of them gave money to him differently. Their stares and response made me pondering. Some gave immediately without doubts. While many were hesitating and not even bothering with him around. A few were rude with both arms across to show confrontation. Every one of them had different measurement of kindness.

Measurement of kindness could only be deterred my ourselves. I think the highest level of kindness are for those who have a pure heart, who is willing to give without condition in mind. I also believe they are gifted and born with it. For instance, a little child who willingly give a penny to a beggar without asking. His mind is innocent. He hasn't learned the greed of life yet. His giving is out of his true kindness.

My personal assumption on the second level of kindness are for those who willingly give with an intention of thought. Usually are for spiritual obligation or for the thought of good deeds. Is not wrong with a good intention of such but the heart has to borrow a feeling of niceness before you are willing to give. In this level, you give and indirectly you gain at the same time. Meaning, someone receives your kindness and in turn you benefited a feeling of happiness.

Check me if I am at wrong here. The next third level of kindness are those who give without the whole heart in mind. He gives for the purpose for showing he is kind. His happiness is artificial for his gain is only his pride. In fact, deep down in his heart, he has more pain than gain when he gives. Or should I conclude, there is no kindness in this level of giving.

You are kind but how kind you are, is only you know! Perhaps some of you out there are prepared to share a bit of your kind experiences with me.

Food for the heart - "Kind words can be short, but their echoes are endless" - Mother Teresa.

Are you in control of time?

The world says time management is important in life. Should time control you or you control time? I think it depends on situation and the needs.

If a wild attractive lady has three boyfriends to serve, she needs to control time. Otherwise her different boyfriends might meet face to face, when all anger and jealousy will be confronted. She has to be smart to divide time according to the convenient of her men. If she manages her time well, non of the men might meet to face the unexpected. Controlling time gives her fun and excitement. However having a tight schedule to cater the requirements of these three gentlemen, I believe the lady will definitely have no more time to herself. Indirectly time controls her all the time. I personally know a lady friend who has a husband and two lovers at one time. She looks happy from the outside when she carries her pride to hold three men successfully. She could blind others but not me. Because her eyes show the truth. She is actually being controlled by time.

Next! Look at our working world. It's always good to be highly motivated and be able to serve diligently. But you have to be careful because at times, motivation could carry you over board. I have known a close associate lady who is sincere, hard working, kind and always a yes person. She is a very approachable and friendly person too. She is taught to manage time on her work. On her daily assignments and appointments, she looks capable to fix her time accordingly. She works day and night, and almost everyday of the week. Week days are for her clients and weekends are given to non business affairs. Personally she thinks, she is managing time well but I think she has forgotten time for herself. She lacks peace and calmness. Without her realising, time is actually controlling her all the time again. Time makes her more stressful and she gets tire easily. Lately she catches flu often and develop mouth and tongue ulcers regularly. I wonder whether she knows her mistakes!

The second and minute are clicking all the time. Is beyond every human being to control the clicking of time. You might think you can control and manage time efficiently but sometimes you just have to let time control you. Like if you are on an appointment when you started early, then you control time. Not when for something hold you back and you started late for your appointment. Then you have to rush for your destination when time would control you on that journey. Nobody is perfect but we try to be perfect to appreciate time. For whatever is the lost time, we will never get it back again.

The definition of time by Stephen Hawking - "There is no beginning of time & there is no ending of time."

The ladder of success.

Was sad to see my fellow colleague, YF down with depression. She has been an agent for more than eight years. She had not been doing well in her business. When I met her recently, she failed even to secure the appointment with a prospective client for that day. She had to wait for this prospect for more than an hour, before he texts a message to inform he had a board meeting. Apparently the prospect took her for granted without even realising how she felt. This rejection made her valueless and unwanted. If continue with more rejections of such, I believe YF might even have to leave this profession.

The above incident is common to many aspiring agents who have been in the business for more than three years. The first three years are achievable years, when agents could sell to many of their acquaintances. Usually the first or second policy is easier to sell, especially to those they know. Regrettable not many agents know how to sell with different skill as they pursuit further this career. They are not taught to understand the right way to review present clients need and expansion. How to develop confidence when they meet new prospects. Not forgetting, when they try to identify prospective clients with value, these intelligent prospects could also be assessing their personality and skill. A successful agent speaks with confident and strength. Comparing with an unsuccessful agent who might speaks with desperation. A successful agent has the skill to lead and control his prospects. Whereas the unprofessional agents are usually dictated by their prospects and clients.

If you profess and image to be a true professional agent, I believe all prospects and clients will respect your value. Otherwise, the unprofessional one might be taken just like a salesperson. In order to help YF, I had to be direct to her. She had not sold as a true professional agent. Is high time she has to change her way of selling life insurance. Can't blame her prospect for taken her for granted. He knew she needed the sale more than he needed the cover. He was smarter than her in the first place.

Food for the thought - "Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will" - Mahatma Gandhi.

Love makes the world go round.

A SYT looked upset. She complained that man is always naughty and mischievous. Man is the causes of all evil and sorrow to woman. She claimed, without man, perhaps there is more peace and calmness to the world.

In order to protect myself and for the rest of all men, I had to enlighten this frustrated attractive lady. I started with this statement, "With man and woman, this world is brighter and more meaningful to live." The beauty of all women, excites the sight and feeling of man. In turn, he begins to approach and court the attractive lady like the SYT here. He attempts to call and date her. His perseverance and courage, touches the heart of the lady. She accepts his invitation. By doing so, she tends to beautify herself. If there is no man in this world, SYT will not be dated for this romantic night. She will not feel to be admired and appreciated as an attractive woman. Though man could be playful in nature, he showers admiration and appreciation which is greatly needed by all women of this world.

This is only the start for all love relationship. With a bit of determination and sincerity, I am sure the man could propose and marry SYT. As she is the queen for the man, she could almost request anything from him. If truly he loves her, he will never fail to give her all the happiness in life. In turn, if SYT understands her role as a woman for him, her charm and passion will motivate and excite him to reach even the unreachable stars of the sky. Because love has all the energy and miracle of life. Together with SYT and her mate, they build the nest of a family. From the two of them, they multiply and expand. More children and more homes will be created. This is how the world has to be spinned over and over again. Without the man, the world is dead and non progressive as of today. There is less colour and less excitement.

Finally! I told SYT, please let the man to continue to behave as what we are. We are created to be playful and cheeky towards woman. However, I assure her, if she is smart like my little darling, she will definitely get the right man to love her like a queen. So just be patience and give yourself a chance for the deserving man to appear. Otherwise the world will cease to rotate.

Food for the heart - "Few things in the world are more powerful than a positive push. A smile. A word of optimism and hope. A " you can do it" when things are tough" - Richard M. Devos.

Touch the heart.

Something I learned today. The heart of man is felt greatly from his eyes. Whereas woman heart is touchable by words through the romantic mouth.

To make a man happy and excited, don't waste your time to explain in words. Simply show the beauty in front of him and he will melt his heart immediately. Not woman! Seeing isn't enough for them. They need to be complimented. They need assurance from words. Words of admiration and affection stimulate their tender heart. Man is easier to please. As long as the sighting is attractive and interesting, they will fall for the feminine charm. Woman is difficult to satisfy. You have to be patience and have tolerance with them. All your words have to be sweet and passionate. Allowing the flow of listening to touch their deep heart of acceptance.

I also had a chance to ask one loving couple who love each other very much. They claimed they have total trust and faith within themselves. However jealousy is still unavoidable in their emotion. Especially at time knowing the other partner is being admired or being courted upon by another opposite sex. Usually their jealousies are not revealed but kept in their subconscious mind. At their conscious mind, they behave normal to trust each other. I am puzzled here! As man is easy to be pleased but woman is not, yet when they are in love and are united, they could still be jealous and shy or too reluctance to reveal their hidden emotion of guilt. Is this pride of oneself? Can someone out there explain better than my confusion?

Food for the thought - "All healing is first a healing of the heart" - Carl Townsand

Rich in heart.

I had seen Hanafiah grew. From a young innocent man at 21, after 18 years he has developed himself to be a successful stock broker in town. Few days ago, he texts me a message, "Can you write in your blog. The longer I live in this world, the lesser friends I get. I mean, a lot of friends but so little good and sincere friends. Why?"

From his words, I knew he wasn't happy and somethings must be disturbing him. Without ado, I invited him for a lunch when we had a long fruitful sharing. During our friendly chat, I started to ask this simple question, "Are you rich?" It fact this question was thrown to me a few day ago by an intelligent lady. Hanafiah replied, "Robert, you have seen me progress. I was penniless when you knew me. God has taken good care of me and blessed me with wealth from my trading. I consider myself as rich. With a little luck, I could be richer in a few months time when I might hit the jackpot."

I felt happy for Hanafiah frankness. Instead I said, "You are lucky my friend. You are definitely wealthier than me. However I am rich in my heart which makes the different." By his look, I knew he did not really understand my meaning. These were my explanation to him here.

To be rich in heart, one who is willing to give unconditional love to whoever he meets. Be they strangers, friends, enemies, poor or rich, young or old, man or woman. As long as they are from this planet earth. Offer your love with humbleness. Not only to the rich but to the poor as well. Be kind to the one who needs your help. Be caring to those who seek your assistance. Give without any expectation of return. Give with all your smiles. Give to those who even complain and criticize against you. Give to feel happy and joyful. Give to feel contented and fulfilling. Give to the world and make others happy. If only you could understand that by giving and making people happy because of yourself, you will feel the happiness in you too. This is what I call rich in the heart.

A person who is rich in heart will see the world as beautiful as ever, because his heart is happy all the time. I told Hanafiah, you might be rich in wealth but your heart isn't rich yet. Unless he is prepared to change his perception of life. After all, love is free. The more you give away, the more you will receive. Otherwise I won't have survived this long in this selling world with so much of respect, value and trust given to me, by my clients, friends, dears and my little darling. I love them whole heartily and equally they love me sincerely too. I hope Hanafiah can accept my wisdom of life.

Food for the heart - "Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind" - Henry James.

Forget first or forgive first.

A sweet young thing (SYT) threw me this question. "Forgiving is easy but forgetting isn't!"

I told her, if she could not forget, then I am sure she had not forgiven yet. Unless she could forget, forgiving is assured in any instances. In order to clear her doubts, I depicted some illustration to this SYT.

A friend might had offended SYT. Later this friend realised her mistakes. She approached SYT and asked for forgiveness sincerely. Unless SYT had a great heart and mind to forgive and forget, her friend would never be forgiven. SYT had to forget her friend's wrong first, before she could forgive this person.

SYT had a boyfriend who was unfaithful to her. The incident caused SYT to feel extremely painful in heart and mind. The boyfriend asked for forgiveness. The unfaithfulness was due to temptation but his love for her remains. SYT might forgive him but the thought of him with another lady was unbearable. Not able to forget the unpleasant incident, their love for each other would never be the same again. Because the true sense of forgiving was not there, although claimed given.

SYT fell in love again with a another boyfriend. His love for her is true, sincere and warm. His patience, intelligence, fun, humour and caring, prove worthy to her. He is honest and frank to reveal his past wrong doings and admitted his failure in other previous love relationships too. SYT is a very understanding lady. She knows love has to be unconditionally given. She knows trust is the vital support in loving a mate. She accepts the past as a learning stage of life. The past mistakes were our teachers to guide us to be better person for present and for the future. She is totally a wise lady who could forget her new boyfriend's past and is prepared to forgive him in every way. I termed her as the happiest person because she really has forgiven her lover while forgetting his past. She has accepted him as what he is of now.

Conclusion - we have to forget first before we can forgive.

Food for the heart - "When a deep injury is done on us, we never recover until we forgive" - Alan Paton

Love her whole heartily.

While watching my little darling swam at the poolside, I had some fun chat with another interesting club member. He said, "To love a woman, you have to love her with the two holes." I was a bit puzzled, "I beg a pardon! I really don't understand that statement. Can you explain?" He continued, "To love a woman, you have to love her whole heartily for her hole."

His meaning was. To get her heart, you have to love her entire self. You have to understand what she likes and doesn't like. You have to love her whole family, as thought they are yours. You have to make her happy all the time. Making sure she isn't sad or sorrowful. You protect and let her feel secure with your present. Her problems are yours. Her needs and wants have to be taken care by you. You have to amuse and to humour her to laugh. Her time is more important than yours. You give her more priorities than others. What belongs to her are hers, but what are yours have to be shared with her. She can be the queen but you can't be the king. You can be the master of the house, but whenever she says no...you also have to say no. Unless you can accept to love her whole heartily, you will never be able to get her hole. These are the true facts of life. For those ladies who read including my little darling, would you agree to it?

Food for the heart - "We are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past, but by the love we're not extending in the present" - Marianne Williamson.

Sell towards a receptive mind.

I have known Gan for almost three years. He was working for my client as an engineer until he left recently to start his own business. Still unmarried at 30 now. During these period, he never gave me a chance to talk on my favorite subject, life insurance. He always sounded he had enough covers and had friends to handle his policies. I took the wrong guess that he knew about the needs and the benefits of our products.

I had the opportunity to meet up with him again recently, when he relocated his new office besides my friend place. He was too keen to introduce his new set up plus showing me his newly invented products, dealing in IT security. His demonstration convinced me that this hardware system could be useful to many of my clients and friends. Without hesitation, I promised to assist and promote his range of products. Naturally Gan was happy and we became closer in relationship.

Last week when I was supposed to meet him again, he called to cancel our appointment. His father had a bad accidental fall and was admitted to the hospital for an immediate operation. Two days ago, he called to request my help. The father admission cost them a bomb. He only carried a small insurance plan and the son did not know how it works. Neither the serving agent was around. Upon checking with his dad's cover, I realised there was no medical benefit included. I was also surprised from this discussion, Gan actually knows very little on insurance matters and he has no friend who are in insurance too. Meaning all this while, he behaved he knew and refused to listen when he was approached.

As we went further to talk more on life insurance with the various benefits and options, he was surprised and admitted his ignorance of the goodness in this miracle product. He asked more than he should. He went deep to enquire the inside out. Before I left, he requested three proposals to be quoted for himself and his parents. I am sure I had sold him already now, but they should had been sold three years ago. Was it my mistakes?

Conclusion - no sale could be sold when the prospect's mind isn't receptive. With an opened mind plus good relationship, nothing will stop a sale from being closed.

Food for the thought - "To make one good action succeed another, is the perfection of goodness" - Ali Ibu Abi Talib.

Am I too old to have a baby?

My little darling introduced me to one of her friend. He is 59 and happily married to a much younger wife of 30. From his first marriage, he has three grown up children. The second wife gave him another son who is only 3 years young. What amazed me was, the wife is again pregnant and will be expecting soon. The younger son and wife kept the man young as well. He looks much younger than his age.

I wonder why my little darling talked so much about this admirable family. Was it the man that captured her interest or the young son and wife! On our way home, she threw me this question. "If I am pregnant, do you give me the right to decide to tell you or you insist that I should not hide from you?" Ohhh!!! That was a powerful question. Unexpected but was happy. I did not know whether I replied her right. I said, "Darling, whatever is your decision, I will not mind."

I am just like her great friend, having a wisdom mind but a young heart. Now that all my children are grown up, married and not staying close to me, shall I try to have another baby for myself again. I was not a perfect father before but I am sure I can be a better one now. If that happened, all my present grand children will be older than my child. Should they call the junior as uncle or auntie? Perhaps not to confuse everyone, I think the ideal name should be addressed as 'sweetheart'. I know all my children would be laughing if they read this blog, but is good for them to laugh because they have an interesting and courageous dad. After all, I believe there is only one live and I will try to make it as interesting as possible while I am still living. Or on the other hand, it is silly for me to make baby again. Would having another new born be a burden for me at my present real age. How would the society be looking at me? They might think I am a crazy old man. Or many might accept me as an admirable old young person. Am I right or wrong? I have been sharing my wisdom on this blog without fail. Is time I should seek my readers comments on this subject. Your enlightening would be much appreciated.

I learned from C. S. Lewis - "You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream."

Serving to please.

Today I brought a maturity cheque to Kumar. I have known him and his family for more than twenty years. During these two decades, he had taken my advices to effect all the various plans for his family. Many a time, he had intention to terminate some policies or when he wasn't doing well, he tried to avoid paying his premium. Whenever that happened, we would sit down to review and to discuss. I would try my level best to encourage him to continue, which he never failed to accept my professional advices. Although he wasn't in the house, I gave the cheque to his loving wife, Muni who was delighted with excitement. This was the second maturity cheque given so far. Two years ago, we handed to him a similar payment.

This was what Muni said when she received our insurance cheque. "Robert! We are so glad to have been blessed with such a committed life insurance agent like you. I have to thank you Chakra who introduced you to us. Without your constant encouragement and advices, we will not be able to save by ourself definitely. This saving won't be here today. Thank you for being an agent and a good friend to us."

Those words melted my heart deeply. I felt honour to serve. I felt proud to be still around and to be available after more than 26 years in the making. I did not deviate, neither did I move away for other greener pasture, but rather to keep my promise to deliver. I am here to serve to please which matters.

Food for the heart - "If you can make good use of time, you will surely go where you want to go."

The way to identify baby girl or boy!

I would be expecting my sixth grand child this coming September. When I saw my daughter in law early this year, when she was only two months pregnant, I could see the expected baby to be a girl. I told Fionna then, "My dear, your baby is a girl." She could not believe it, until she and her husband who recently did a scanning which confirmed the sex as to be a female. They are over joy as our family actually has too many males. A darling girl will make a lot of different to us. Especially to a young grand dad like me, who now loves girls more than boys.

Fionna asked. "Dad! How could you see me to be conceiving a girl at that early stage of pregnancy?" This is something I had learned through the years of observing and experiencing. When a woman is carrying a baby boy, she tends to look rough in physical and facial. Perhaps the male hormone in her, changes her metabolism. Physiologically she looses her feminine charm. However if she carries a girl, the extra female hormone makes her to be more sexier and prettier. Look at her above photograph posted. She is still as beautiful as before, because there is another beautiful girl inside her. Scanning could identify the end result but our eyes are equally effective if only we learn to use them well.

Food for the thought - "Thought is cause; experience is effect. If you don't like the effects in your life, you have to change the nature of your thinking" - Marianne Williamson

His glory will be shown in her face.

William had not seen my son, Alvin for two years. He was too eager to know about his well being. I had not seen my son for quite awhile too, as he has migrated afar. We only chat online. Alvin could be a smart boy to me but he was always the mischievous and the playful one. However I noticed lately through our chat, he has grown to be more wiser, humble, simpler and more homely in nature. Something that surprised me! Then came another day, I had the opportunity to chat with his wife, Fionna at home. Casually I asked her about Alvin. She was very happy with the husband because he came home early for dinner most of the time. He often bought flowers for her. They held hand whenever they went out. He is more caring and tends to be more romantic than before. This is definitely good news.

As William is an experience man, he remarked, "I am sure your son has changed. Judge him by the lady's words." Not all men would tell the truth of their behaviour. To "check & balance" of the man, ask his woman and the truth would be revealed. The emotion of the lady depicts the happiness from her man. If she is joyful and delighted in voice and facial, most likely she is treated well by her man. Otherwise it could be the reverse effect. Meaning, the glory of a man is shown in the face of his lover.

Food for the heart - "Once you have loved, you will always love. For what's in your mind may escape but what's in your heart will remain forever."

At age 60, what excite me everyday?

A sweet young thing (SYT) asked, "At your age 60, what excite me everyday?"

I told the SYT, everything excites me. What the young could do, I equally can! What I could do, the young may not! I have the mind of wisdom and the heart of 37 turning 36. The young could feel young but not all older person could. Unless the old have the courage to do so. I have been selling for 40 years. My greatest sale isn't the 10 million plan or the number one insurance agent of my company, but rather to sell myself to my little darling who willingly accept my soul. I consider this as my greatest achievement in life. To do so, I need all the things I had learned in lives to convince her. Not only knowledge and wisdom, but the true heart and purity of the soul to touch her spirit.

Finally she wrote to tell her thought, "Sweetheart..if you are confident and have fate in our partnership and love affair as soul mate...I will be also babe..I just know that since we are together...I have found love and happiness and confidence...especially the support that you have given me...thank you sweetheart."

Those words inspire me. They create excitement and spur me to feel younger and accepted. My mind start to create dreams and hopes. I have more fantasies and goals to long for. Suddenly I feel I am starting a new live again. My talks are sweeter and my interaction tends to be warmer. I am more health conscious and exercise more regularly. My muscle is firm and my stamina is strong. My thought is active with creativeness. I have great desire to share when I could blog almost every night. I sell more effectively and my after sale services are remarkable. My humour is fantastic which could make you laugh crazily. While my wisdom of life could solve most of your sorrow. I appreciate every single minute of my lives and render assistance and help to others without people asking. Everyday is an exciting day. All these are possible because I have made my soul mate to love me more.

This is how I excite myself to live. At whatever age you are, you need different way to live happily and meaningfully. Measurement of success to man is; At age 3, success is don't shit in the pant. At age 12, success is how to make friends. At age 20, success is sex. At age 30, success is money. At age 50, success is money. At age 60, success is sex. At age 75, success is how to make friends. At age 85, success is don't shit in the pant. So! What is yours?

Food for the thought - "We don't stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing" - George Bernard Shaw.

The heart is more important than the look.

When you buy a new motor car, is the external design more important than internal the engine? I believe most would be captured more by the design than anything else. Not many take the trouble to look at the specifications. The intelligent buyers might have the appeal for a new model, but they will take time to seriously review the car specs. To them the performance, safety features and suspension of the vehicle are more vital than its outside beauty. Meaning, they judge their ideal car from the inside first rather than the external.

Similarly most people look at the beauty of a person from the outside rather than the inside. A man looks at the attractiveness of a woman and the lady is more attracted to the handsome man. The outside beauty could be temporary. The inside of a good heart is more permanent. If you are a buyer who only depends on the fashionable look of a new car, most likely you would also pick a woman you love from just the outside beauty. A car without the quality of a good engine, might not last for long. A person without a true heart, might not be a faithful lover. The beauty of a person should be judged more from the inside.

My little darling is a very attractive and beautiful lady of her class. To me, her beauty as a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of her must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides. With all her qualities, I really consider myself as very fortunate for I have found a soul mate. Have you?

Food of the thought - "You came from no where, and in no time got close..., not to me, but to my heart."

Know your strength & mistakes from your clients.

Selling tips for my fellow colleagues.

Each time I closed a case, especially a new client, I would try to assess his strength and his weaknesses. I compliment his strength but also advise his weaknesses if there are. It is easy to offer goodness to another but not many darn to highlight another person weaknesses. Close friends will offer both assistance. If you are truly a sincere agent, you should not be afraid to compliment and advise at the same time. If it is done tactfully with professionalism, your client normally would appreciate your endeavour.

Finally before I leave, I would always ask my client whether he is happy with my services. In order for me to improve my services, I would be glad if he could be frank to outline my strength too. By telling my strength, I could capitalize further on them. However I wish also to know whether I had made any mistakes as well. Telling my mistakes or defects are one way I could correct myself. I assure my clients, I would never feel offended in any way, if they could provide these plus and minus in my selling. Their comments are always benefiting and rewarding to our relationship building.

Conclusion: clients and agent would learn much from each other. It reflects the maturity of your personality. You develop a greater confidence within your clients.

Confucious said, "Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."

Is there a school for marriage?

I was driving into this township, where I noticed all shops and even residential homes are converted into wedding parlours. They are beautifully decorated with dresses of the bride and groom. Even my little darling who saw it, was attracted to them. I was sure, she was dreaming to get marry again, when she could have the chance to wear those latest fashionable dresses.

Yes! There are many wedding or marriage parlours to cater and arrange for new couples who have intention to get marry. You just pay and the parlours would do the rest to cater your needs according to your wedding budget. So to get marry is easy. However to stay and maintain a good marriage is uncertain. Sometimes I wonder, why there is no wedding or marriage institution to teach and educate couples first before getting marry. Rather, all who want to get marry spend so lavishly first but not knowing what is the responsibility to being getting marry. After all to be husband and wife, they have different roles to play in life. To be good friends and lovers are much easier but to be a married couple, they have to experience to understand.

The only school for marriage is from the Catholic Church. Although I am not a Catholic, I know a Catholic cannot seek for divorce once he/she is married. So when a couple who intends to get marry in their Church, the Father always insists a marriage encounter first. Is a programme that last a few weeks, when the soon to be married couple has to attend the briefing and teaching of life as being a husband and wife. The man should understand his responsibility to her and the woman knows how to love the man. Making sure the couple would not fail in their marriage lives together later. However this school of marriage teaching is not opened to the outside world. Perhaps there should be a wedding school that comes along with the wedding parlour. Then, there will be lesser misunderstanding of man and woman in this world.

Food for the heart - "Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit" - Peter Ustinov.

How much shall we love our children?

There is a Chinese saying,"No wealth can pass through three generations." I certainly have to believe in it. Especially having the experiences in selling life insurance and getting close with my clients. Let me share some of my real stories in life.

Mr Zu is currently a very successful corporate lawyer. His bungalow on top of a hill will tell his achievement. His surrounding and possession are amazing. He was born in a simple home 58 years ago. As a child he studied hard and during the school holidays, he worked part-time to earn the extra pocket money. For his excellent academic result, he was awarded a government scholarship to study law in England. Upon returning, he became an effective lawyer. Happily married with another lawyer who later turned full time housewife. Currently they have four children, the eldest is 29 and the youngest is only 12. Both the elder son and daughter have double degrees from England too. The sad thing is both are not willing to work. According to the dad, there are plenty of job opportunities for them, but they are the least interested to gain employment. The father has given everything to them, from driving expensive cars, credit cards and good saving accounts. He is extremely sad and worried over them because they lack personal drive to achieve success. I could only listen from the unhappy friend.

Madam Tham is a retired teacher and is a widow since 10 years ago. Her late husband was a wealthy man, who had left a substantial amount of assets to all his four sons. All the four children had completed their overseas studies with professional degrees again. However the mother is sad and worried too because non of them are serious in their careers. Most of the time, they prefer to be unemployed by living on their royalties. I had spoken to the lady but nothing could be done.

There are many more similar encounters I had experienced. It is so sad to see our younger generation loosing their enthusiasm and interest in lives. They are well pampered, educated and loved upon by their parents but regret their attitude is rather weak without the drive to succeed. Whose wrong was it and who were to be blamed? Can someone enlighten them?

Food for the thought - "You will never know true happiness until you have truly loved, and you will never understand what pain really is until you have lost it."

I can't work without woman.

I was well served by two Bangladeshi waiters in our club coffee house. They have good manner and always smiled. I had a good time talking with them, when I could understand better. They are both at their thirties and have been working here for almost three years. They are married, leaving the wives and children back home. Our of curiosity, I pondered them some personal questions, which they were frank to review.

Me: "Since you are away from home for so long, have you got girl friends here?"

Waiter: "Boss! If we don't have girl friends, lives will be very difficult for us."

Me: "I don't understand. Can you be more precise?"

Waiter: "Without our girl friends, our lives will be lonely. Our intimacy and sexual encounter enhance our well being. Otherwise, we have no desire to work. And working here for three years will be a torture without them."

Me: "What about your wives back home then?"

Waiter: "Wife without man is alright. As long as we sent back money to them. They will be happy with our children."

Me: "Who are your girlfriends here? Are they locals or foreigners?"

Waiter: "Boss! How can? The local girls will not eye on us. We have to pick the foreigners who are just like us. They are also lonesome too."

With the short discussion, it revealed the truth of man's needs in nature. They could be from firm religious background and up bringing back home. Their employment contract might spell strict conditions and rules of close contact with promiscuous. Nothing will stop them from searching their loves or lust. Now I know why they are smiling so sweet in face because they too have reached their satisfaction and contentment in heart. But for sure, I think it is not easy for such healthy young men to work so far from home. For those who are reading this article now. Do you think they are right or wrong?

Food for the heart. "It breaks your heart to see the one you love is happy with someone else - but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you."