Grandma wants it too.

A Visit From Grandma & Grandpa

Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills. The son said, 'I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very strong and very expensive.' 'How much?' asked Grandpa.'$10.00 a pill,' Answered the son. 'I don't care,' said Grandpa, 'I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow.' Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said, 'I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00. 'I know,' said Grandpa. 'The hundred is from Grandma!'

Don't laugh and don't take for granted! Whether is your girlfriend, wife, soulmate or grandma, all women love sex as much as us too.

Tip for the men..."8 qualities to be a perfect man; Brave, Intelligence, Gentle, Polite, Energetic, Nice, Industrious & Self-organized. In short he must be B.I.G.P.E.N.I.S".

Are you hot in bed?

This is interesting..... According to a survey conducted by pharmaceutical company Pfizer, it revealed to say we The Malaysian isn't so hot in bedroom..they score poorly under the covers.

Two out of three Malaysian men and three out of four women are not satisfied with their sex lives, the Asia-Pacific Sexual Health and Overall Wellness survey stated. To me is alarming!

The survey links the level of erection hardness to sexual satisfaction for men. The level of erection is measured in a scale of one to four using the Erection Hardness Score (EHS) developed by the European Association of Urology.

Level one is like the tofu where the male organ is large but not hard, level two is similar to a peeled banana where it's not hard enough for penetration, level three is like an unpeeled banana where it's hard enough for penetration but not completely, and level four is similar to a cucumber where it's completely hard and fully rigid.

The men were required to evaluate themselves using the EHS during the survey and 40% of Malaysian men reported that they experienced erection below grade four.

Compared to their EHS grade four counterparts, these men have sex less often, are less sexually satisfied, and may suffer from lack of self confidence, or worse, depression.

They found that greater sexual satisfaction is strongly associated with greater satisfaction with life overall. Generally, men and women who are highly satisfied with their sex life have a more positive outlook on their relationship and life.

See! Sex is very important to our lives. You might want to succeed in your career, having all the necessary knowledge and support, but you are not satisfied with your sex, most likely your life with be hindered. No relationship would be happier, unless the couples are bonded with satisfying sex. A nation could not progress aggressively, if the people are not happy due to poor sex.

Tips for the men. If your male organ belongs to the tofu or the banana type, high time you should seek help. There are many type of penis massages which could turn tofu or banana to cucumber which all women love. Unless you are a cucumber man, you would never stand tall with women. I like to eat tofu and banana but I always have my cucumber ready to be used at all time.

I was told - "7 Days makes one week. 7 days of sex makes one weak, but no sex a week makes one sick. However, good sex once a week makes one seek! Have you had yours this week?"

The devil & angel in us.

CP is a sweet, mature, attractive and a very successful lady. In character and behaviour, she has always been kind and helpful to all her friends and colleagues. Out of jealousy because of her popularity, one of her younger colleague criticised and condemned behind her back. Out of anger, CP refused to befriend this staff. Sometimes CP had bad thoughts against the younger girl, though she might not know about it. Came one day, when this girl who returned from a short holiday, brought back some gifts and happily gave each and every of her colleagues in the office a souvenir. She did not forget to give one to CP too. When CP received this little present, she felt so touched and shameful. Emotional she was guilty because her mind was against her friend earlier. In her heart she thought she was pure and sincere but her mind was sinful to be corrupted. Not knowing why she behaved wrongly, CP was frank to relate her thought to me.

The only simple reason I gave CP was..everyone of us has a devil and angel in us. Sometimes the devil is greater when he wins but those who have beautiful angels tend to live more happier all the time. Listen to Abraham Lincoln's statement and we will never fail in dealing with others - "I destroy my enemy when I make him my friend".

They ain't heavy, they're my parents.

I had a client who called not to renew his mother's medical insurance. His reason was, time is bad and non of his younger brothers and sisters are prepared to share to pay the needed cover for the old parent. As he is the eldest in the family, her mum is staying with him. The rest of the sibling are trying to avoid sharing the burden to care for the aging lady.

This is a sorrowful part of live! All parents will care for their children but not necessary children of today would standby for the parents when they are aging. Of course my client had the right to terminate and discontinue his insurance but it's also my duty to teach them the wisdom to live.

In life respect has to be earned. If a son wants his children to love and respect him, especially when he is old and cannot earn anymore, then he has to show to the children how he loves and cares for his mother when she is still alive. The young grand children learn from the father who willingly and sincerely loves the grand old lady. Kindness, thoughtfulness, humbleness are respect which should be shown and taught when the chidren are growing. Children might be innocent but they are not blind. When you sow the seed of love, eventually the fruits of joy and harmony will be in the entire family.

I hope my words of wisdom could enlighten this father, who is seriously considering whether to continue the needed medical cover for his mum. Though I am a life insurance agent, I play a role of a preacher as well.

Food for thought - "The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life. Rarely do members of one family grow up under the same roof ".
Richard Bach quotes

Women love dresses.

All ladies love dresses, including my little darling. To be her ideal man, I have to learn how to be patience while she shops for her clothing. Whenever there are special promotion in a shopping mall, you rest assured all women would be there. The reduction of prices would make them go crazy to shop.

The other day, while little darling were picking some fashionable designs in this new outlet, I had a chance to speak to a male promoter who spoke on some characters and behaviour of female shoppers. He said, ladies are much fussy shoppers than men. You have to give them time and patience is again mentioned. You cannot push them, neither can you rush them. They look at design, quality, price and fitting. They can spend hours in one boutique, and might not buy, if non of the dresses suit them. Or perhaps they just want to feel beautiful trying new dresses without buying. There are two types of female shoppers which sounded interesting to me. The first are the perfectionists who buy nothing except the best. They go into details, to make sure the dresses have no flaw and defect. These type of ladies are usually sharp, intelligence, smart, attractive, successful, unfriendly, unapproachable, fussy and have taste of life. The second are the easy going type who are more friendly and approachable. Without women, this fashion industry would not survive.

Some tips for the gentlemen. If you intend to court a lady, invite her to an expensive and fashionable boutique. Let her feel the attractive surrounding, encourage her to try those she likes and make sure you pay for whatever she buys. Sometimes unintentionaly I had quarrels and misunderstanding with little darling, the best way to patch up is to take her to the boutique too. Words might not work but dresses for her will. Am I right sweetheart?

This quote on happiness by Spike Milligan - "Money can't buy you happiness, but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery".

She is a keen reader.

One could be a work-alcoholic who is addicted to work but I did not know one could also be addicted to reading. Tesh is only fourteen who reads an average of two books a day. As a little baby, her caring mum read books to her. By the time she was three, she was reading all by herself. I believe she could have read thousand of books during these couple of years. Her mum found it too expensive to buy books for her. Instead she left her in most bookshops in town, when she could be left alone to read all by herself. She read all types of book, from novels to cartoons, either in English or Chinese.

I had picked a few tips from her. Generally a good book should be read twice, in order to enjoy the contents. The first reading is fast and the second time is slow reading. Never judge a book by its cover or introduction because the real action is always at the centre column of a book. Whenever she reads, she could be like reading into another world of its kind. The book is a world by itself to her.

The funny part of her is...though she reads to be knowledgeable but she is still too young to know how to apply what she had read. If she knows, I am sure she would be almost like a genius. I am not an addictive reader but I applied what I had read that matters most.

The lady who shared with me this phrase - "Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person." Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC)

Time spend on family is precious.

Joe is a good friend who is resting at home, recovering from a major operation. He is suffering from lumber spinal stenosis with a severe back pain. While visiting him at home, I could see he has lost a lot of weight.

This was what he told me. His back pain was due mainly to long hour of work. He is a very committed senior manager of an international IT corporation. From rank and files, he rose himself, while working 12 to 15 hours per day. In fact, a couple of years ago, one of his senior boss advised him to slow down with his responsibility. Working hard is good but working smart is better. The boss reminded him...each employee of a company is only a number to the employer, especially when one is working for a large corporation. Every staff is given a serial number, the name isn't important but the numbers are their identification. If a staff dies, most likely his immediate department would feel sorrowful for him. Three months later, a handful of colleagues might still think of him but after 6 months, nobody would remember him. His serial number would be closed permanently. However the only people who could still think and remember him, are his family and his loved one. They are the one who could cherish him forever.

This recent surgery was a blessing in disguise to Joe who realised he had actually spent too little time with his family. He promised to make good and intended to balance his life accordingly. Give the most valuable and precious time to those who remember you. I think he is right...I will spend more time with my family, especially my little darling who is so important to me.

I was taught to live a balance life - "Career, Family, Health, Friends, Financial, Communities & Spiritual".

Have some fun in our work.

In our insurance industry, we called ourselves in many ways. Those days, we were addressed as Life Insurance Agent and today you have all types of titles. Even in my company the successful one,are given a heavy name. The agents are called Wealth Planners and the Agency Managers are taken as Wealth Leaders. To keep our people all track, the company would text message to us everyday to invite us to all sort of trainings, seminars, gatherings, etc and etc...until we don't bother to look into their messages anymore. They are too standardised and are not innovative in their presentation.

My hands were itchy and my mind was restless, when I wrote this message on my hand phone.. "Dear Prulove Planner, u are the only one cordially invited to participate in our one2one Sex&LoveWealthAccumulation session at our auditorium at DI3. Time at 1.30am on Feb 22. Interested pls contact RF, our only SoulPlanner".

Out of curiosity, I sent the above message to four lady colleagues to see what their reaction would be like. Immediately I had three responses which made me laughed. The first one.."Oop! Correction 22 Feb is Sabbath Day cannot talk sex issue lo". The second one.. "Very creative larling!!!" The third was the one I like most.. "Yes...:-) ... on on!!"

How I wish our company could be more creative than me. My belief..."All work no play, makes Jack a dull dull boy!!"

Happiness is making others happy.

The easiest way to start an exciting day is to make someone happy early in the morning. Today is one of my good friend's birthday. I sent him this text message... "Specially to this lovable boy. Nasir... The best way to pay for a lovely moment is to enjoy it. Especially today. Happy Birthday".

Nasir is a CEO of a reputable company in town. Though he was extremely busy when he received my wishes in the morning, he took a bit of time to reply my message. His sms was written.."Your sweet words make me look for more in life though I can be plain contented at this age. You make people happy and that is so precious. Thanks you and I am trying to emulate your principles in life and to be a useful human being. God bless you".

I gave him a good start for the day and his meaningful reply made my day beautifully as well. This is definitely true..."The beauty of life does not depend on how happy you are, but on how happy others can be because of you".

Value depends on individual affordability.

I had a chance to celebrate a friend's birthday over a Chinese dinner in town. When the bill came later, she was surprised the charges were cheap and reasonable priced. I told her, the bill was not cheap but because she is doing well when she could afford to pay without feeling the pinch.

The logic in life is...the higher you earn, the more you could purchase and acquire, when everything seems cheap and reachable. Not when you are earning less, everything is expensive then. A Mercedes is cheap to a millionaire but to a poor it is beyond his imagination. The next time when you happen to be moving around a high class neighbourhood, where all homes are by the millions...don't say those bungalows are expensive...say I am not successful yet. Or when you are invited to have a coffee at The Star Buck...never say their drinks are costly...it is because you are not doing well.

The world is not measured by the outside but rather by the individual affordability. "Whores don't live in company of poor men, citizens never support a weak company and birds don't build nests on a tree that doesn't bear fruits." Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC)

Selling is like love & romance.

To enjoy selling life insurance is to know how to have fun out of this career. I relate it as like courting a woman I love. To fall in love is easy at the beginning, when the fire burns wild and exciting. But to maintain a love relationship isn't easy because a lot of effort has to be given, in order to keep the desire to love and be loved.

Selling insurance works the same manner. Is not a problem to sell but to stay in the business on a longer term might be hard. All prospective new agents came with a strong desire to succeed this challenging career. The first few weeks or months, they smiled their way to the friends to buy. They thought and assumed, they had fallen in love with the business. They could be just looking at the sales by converting it to dollars and profits they earned. A love relationship needs attention and sacrifices for the love and the romance to grow. Similarly in our business, our clients require our care and concern as well. These are the period, when sales should not be in our mind but rather as to develop our client's relationship to another level of understanding.

My advice to my fellow colleagues. If you are in the first year of this business, most likely you can concentrate 100% in just selling to new prospects, because you don't have a client's base yet. To those who are in the second and third year, please allow 80% of your time in selling and 20% in serving too. Above 5th year, 60% selling and 40% serving. Above 10th year, 40% selling and 60% serving. As far as I am concerned, I hardly sell because most of the time I am having fun with my clients who have turned to be my good friends now. When they are not happy and have problems, I will be the first one to be by their side to listen to their sorrow. The good part of it, when they smile and are joyful for some special reasons, they will also never fail to inform me. I solved their problems when needed and I recommended life insurances when they are riding high on their achievement.

I know how to tickle my little darling for offering her sincere love to me. At the same time, I also know how to be kind and caring to my clients who in turn love to deal business with me all these years. To succeed in life insurance, love your clients as you love your sweetheart...I rest assure you, you will enjoy this business. Have fun!!!

From a lady who loves me - "The fragrance of flowers spreads only in the direction of the wind. But the goodness of a person spreads in all direction."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC)

She is lonesome.

I might not know Vasala personally. From my closed associate, I was told she isn't a happy lady at the moment. Though she has been selling life insurance for many years and making no head way, she used to complain her sorrow to another lady agent. She is in her mid forties, a divorcee and still remains single by herself. Her colleagues found it difficult to inspire and motivate this frustrating lady. To her, the world is always against her.

To sell life insurance an agent has to be a rounded person, understands all aspects of life. His/her heart has to be happy, in order to see a beautiful world. Without it, most likely that agent will find it difficult to stay in our challenging business.

I believe Vasala is lonesome in heart. She not only needs friends, but she needs an intimate man to love and romance with her. Forget her past memories and mistakes. After all, mistakes are our teachers of life...including love mistakes. Go out! Give herself a chance to seek for an ideal man who could love her with joy and provides her the energy to live. No man could live alone, neither can Vasala who is still attractive and young.

I am sure, there are many Vasala's type of ladies around in life. Hope my short message could enlighten them.

Food for thought - "If you want others to be happy, practise compassion. If you want to be happy, practise compassion" - The Dalai Lama.

Is your life insurance adequate?

Few days ago I handed a critical sickness claim cheque to Ong, who was recently diagnosed with liver cancer. Ong is a food stall owner whom I have known for many years. He is a typical Chinese man who doesn't believe in life insurance. Four years ago I forced him to effect a medical life cover with a minimum cost. He was boastful to claim he didn't need insurance but I knew he was stingy with the premium. When I handed this small payment claim to him, he looked at my face and said..."The cheque is too little to pay my medical expenses. I should have listen to you Robert".

Through my many years of experience, the one who did not buy life insurance would suffer more financially when he was dead or severely sick. Those who effected their insurances reluctantly with a minimum cover might also face the same fate like the above. Not those who believe in life insurance because they planned their protection accordingly. The funny thing is...I have not encountered a sizable death or sickness claim but rather were those who bought the smaller plans. My logic is, those who believe in life insurance tend to be strong minded, positive and always have the piece of mind with them. They are the one who seldom take risks and are responsible people in nature. They live a more healthier and stress free life. However those who are stingy, calculative and sceptical, are more weak minded, negative and irresponsible in character. In the long run, they live a less healthier life when their mind is not peaceful.

Life insurance offers protection and creates a sense of pride and security. "Buy it when you don't need it because when you need it, you cannot buy".

Loves Giver.

Yesterday was a Valentine's Day when the world exchanged the gesture of love. How I wish everyday is a Valentine's Day when everyone is consciously aware of giving out love willingly and not just one day a year. I sent our numerous sms messages to those whom I thought were the reserve one. It was written as.."Have you hug & kiss those you love today? Otherwise try me. Haha!! Happy Naughty Valentine."

Most people know love is a pleasurable feeling and its good to give out. However many are reluctant loves givers. The reasons could be plentiful; shy, afraid, pride, self-esteem, selfish, unfriendly, unwilling, not sure, not taught and many more.

These could happen any where... a young child has done well in school, the parents only feel proud in their heart and not utter a word of praise to him. However if the child makes a mistake, the parents promptly nag at him.

Or perhaps.... Your boyfriend has done a great favour for you. Most likely he might just received a word of thank you and you feel nice having him around. If the girl is not shy, she should also hug and kiss the boyfriend to show her appreciation.

In the home... The husband comes back from a hard day's work. The wife as usual is happy to see him home safely. If she is romantic, she should immediately offer a tender kiss to the man and whisper into his ear..."I am glad to see you darling coz I miss you the whole day".

Over the dinner... the wife has prepared a delicious meal for the family. After the dinner, father and children would just watch tv to relax the evening. The children are not taught to say thank you to the mom for cooking such good food. An understanding father could have hugged his wife and quietly say..."Your food is tasty as ever and we shall make love later darling".

Love creates happiness. It provides inspiration and motivation. What about you? Are you a love giver or energy giver.

Food for thought - "I love you and you love me. That's all we'll ever need."

Happy Valentine's Day

Today is the most sweetest & romantic day of the year. The warm of love could be felt in every corner of our world. If my mum and dad were still around, I will hug and kiss them tightly. My children and families might not be here, my heart and love are always with them.. no matter where they are. To all my readers, friends, clients, dears, honeys and darlings, I wish you all A Happy Valentine's Day. May Love be upon you the whole year round.

To the someone to smile with, someone to laugh with, someone to love ... that's you... Happy Valentine's Day sweetheart! Do you know - Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart....Me!

It's an appropriate day to share The Relationship Secrets....

ANNIVERSARIES.. Always celebrate! Whether it's the 1st or the 50th, each year together is a triumph.

APPRECIATION.. Let each other know how much you appreciate each other. You may already know but hearing it from each other is always better.

BEST FRIENDS.. Be best friends preferably before being boyfriend-girlfriend. Take time to know each other so the relationship will be a deep one. Tell each other about your crushes, dreams and problems. Make sure he/she is your best friend before getting engaged. The strong bond of friendship will help you both survive tough times.

BOND.. Make it a point to spend time together often but leave room for each other. Also spend time alone w/ each other, so that at the end of the day you could both share your experiences. This way, you stay interesting with your partner.

COMPLIMENTS.. Always compliment each other. This will prevent feelings of resentment & thinking that one is being taken for granted.

DATE.. Keep doings things that you both enjoy, do them together. Make time & continue to date to keep the romance - look good, smell good to maintain physical attraction.

DIFFERENCES.. Celebrate differences. Never force your ideologies down each other's throat. Give up trying to turn your partner into you. Accept differences, appreciate them.

FIGHTS.. Fight w/the aim to resolve the issue. Don't outdo each other. The longer you extend the fight. The more chances that you'll say something hurtful that you don't really mean. As mad as you were w/ your partner, he/she is still the person who laughs at your jokes & thinks you're hot. Hear each other out, don't dig up old issues. Choose your battles. Make sure the fight will be worth it & that something will change in the relationship as a result of the fight.

FLAWS.. Know that the perfect person does not exist. Know that just as there are things that you love about him/her, there will be things that will make you go crazy. We are only human with our own flaws.

FUN.. Have fun together! This means keeping the fun & spontaneity that was there in the early days. Allow yourselves to get silly. Being able to make each other laugh & see the lighter, crazier, absurd side is the best way to get through all the differences in personalities, adjustments in lifestyle & opposing viewpoints.

GOALS.. Make sure you have similar goals. It would be difficult to keep your bond intact if your views are complete opposite.

GRUDGES.. Quit tabulating grudges. Let it off. Discuss it, then trash it, don't recycle it.

KEEPING IT HOT.. Keep it hot by traveling to diff. places together. A new setting will do wonders. Always have skin contact - be it holding hands, a massage or just plain leg rubbing.

HONESTY.. Don't lie or hide things. The problem will only get bigger.

KNOW EACH OTHER .. Learn each other's interest. It really keeps the conversation flowing! HUG.. A hug can be far better more intimate than a kiss.

IDENTITY.. Don't lose your personality - that's why he/she fell in love w/you. Have separate interest & activities to keep your individual, & to be able to contribute more to the relationship.

INDEPENDENCE.. Having your own income means you're the boss in your life.

IN-LAWS.. Make rooms for the in-laws.

INTENTIONS.. Wish each other well. Don't wish each other worst

ISSUES.. Speak up about the awkward stuff now, like money & sex. The earlier, the better.

LISTEN.. Listen, listen, listen. Hear each other out especially during arguments.

LOOK GOOD.. Mind your appearance! Stay fit & healthy for each other.

LOVE .. It all boils down to your love, chemistry & respect for each other.

MEMORIES.. Remind each other of the old days. Do something that you used to do for each other before. It may even be corny but it made you two together. Experience new things together- from dining into a new restaurant to experiencing street food together to exploring to new places. It's the little surprises that make great memories.

MIND READING.. No matter how long you've been together, do not think that you can read each other's mind.

NEEDS.. Be good to yourself, then be good to your partner. That's what love is all about. Think about your partner. Will it make him/her happy? Will she/he enjoy it? Consider each other's feelings. Be very attentive & sensitive to each other's needs, physically & emotionally, that way your partner learns to do the same for you. Never take your partner for granted.

PRIORITIES.. If one says it's important, then it is! Prioritize each other among other things.

SPACE.. Give each other space. Have your boy's night out. If you can't trust each other with this, then don't get married.

SORRY.. Say sorry when you're wrong.

SURPRISES.. No matter how long you've known each other, be open to surprises, both good or bad.

TEAMWORK.. Think for two & always work as a team. Consult each other before making a decision because everything will always affect both of you. Strengthen couple power. In many ways, we have to decide based on what is best for the relationship in favor of our individual selves.

SUPPORT.. Support each other's dream. Be willing to follow your passions, support your partner in his/her decisions & create new ones together. Two heads are better than one.

TALK .. Tell each other's stories. Life goes by so fast & its easy to see how easily couple can grow apart. Whenever something funny, scary, exciting or juicy happened to you or to someone you know, tell each other about it & have your partner do the same. Keep each other in the loop of life.

For the one who is reading this title now - "Sometimes we make love with our eyes. Sometimes we make love with our hands. Sometimes we make love with our bodies. Always we make love with our hearts".

I hope u like working with us.

The last twenty seven years, I had served four CEOs, many Senior Directors and Managers while working with my present company. People come and go! You really can't stop them from leaving. Some left for better prospects and few were asked to leave. Was sad to see my good colleagues leaving because we were like a big family working together.

Today I got a chance to meet another two new young vibrant executives who came to my office. They are management staffs who provide us on agency support. Ryan Hew is thirty two and Warren Wong is twenty nine. Their eyes tell that they are ready to work and to prove their worth with our company. Ryan has plenty of love on his face because he is married with a wonderful wife who delivered a new born baby. Warren is still unsure coz he has to seek for his ideal woman but with his intelligence look, I am sure he has plenty to offer. In order to understand them better, I requested both to sign their signatures plus writing four simple words. I might not be expert in reading hand writing but with many years of observing and learning, I could assess both these two gentlemen are aggressive and responsible person by their words written. I feel proud and happy that our company has recruited such quality personals to work along with our agencies.

My advice to them was...they have the intelligence and now is the time for them to apply their smartness on their work. Remember our theme...Listening and to Understand in whatever you do...you rest assure this theme and slogan would not fail you. The only thing I expect from them is faithfulness because getting people to work is easy but to have committed and sincere staffs to work faithfully for life is definitely very difficult. Before they left my office, I wanted them to promise me a favour...if ever you have a thought to resign in the near future, please do come and speak to me first. I might change your mind! Because I believe you are already working with the best company in town. Otherwise I won't have been here for the last 27 years and with some luck, I would want to stay on for another 27 years. They left shaking my both hands firmly to acknowledge my spoken words.

I do hope my two friends were listening - "There is a Universe in the sound of every voice, and if you're a patient listeners, you can often sense the heartbeat in the long silences between the words" - Neenah Ellis.

I have bad dreams.

Is good to have dreams. Dream to be successful or getting your ideal partner in life. Over a party nite, a SYT was telling us she had crazy and horrible dreams. We were thinking, she was referring to goals she was dreaming for. She said, "No! I have scary dreams every nite while sleeping". These dreams were not good for her because her sleeps were very much being disturbed. She tried all types of way to free herself, by changing bed, slept in different positions and drinking milk before sleeping. Nothing works and yet the dreams kept haunting her nite after nite.

According to Britannica, dreams are...Series of thoughts, images, or emotions occurring during sleep, particularly sleep accompanied by rapid eye movement (REM sleep). Dream reports range from the very ordinary and realistic to the fantastic and surreal. Humans have always attached great importance to dreams, which have been variously viewed as windows to the sacred, the past and the future, or the world of the dead. Dreams have provided creative solutions to intellectual and emotional problems and have offered ideas for artistic pursuits. A type of cognitive synthesis that facilitates conscious insight may occur subconsciously during dreaming. The most famous theory of the significance of dreams is the psychoanalytic model of Sigmund Freud; in Freud's view, desires that are ordinarily repressed (hidden from consciousness) because they represent forbidden impulses are given expression in dreams, though often in disguised (i.e., symbolic) form.

Looking at the SYT face and her eyes, I could see something amiss. I asked her, "Mind if I ask you some personal question! Have you got a boyfriend at this moment?" She admitted she had but not now. This was what I told her... I think you are a lady who needs to be loved. By suppressing her emotion and desire, she is stressful in her mind and heart. The unwanted tension and pressure, create frustration and anxiety. She might look attractive outside but in actual fact, she hasn't the peace of mind most of the time and thus lead her to all the horrible dreams when she sleeps.

My advices to her. Fall in love again and your dreams would be more pleasant. Last nite, I received a call from this happy lady. She said, "Thank you so much. I no longer have bad dreams. I have found a new love".

My belief - "When you have horrible dreams, it's high time you have to dream of your love".

Love is energy.

Fizah, my secretary who has been working faithfully with me for sixteen years. Of late, I noticed she is forgetful and even our associates are complaining. This should not have happened because she is only in her mid forties. Last Saturday, by chance I met her in the office when it was quiet, I took the opportunity to have a good chat with her.

Looking deep into her eyes, I could see the little unhappiness in this poor girl of mine. I could understand, her heart was sad and empty. When the heart is unhappy, one don't see the world as beautiful and without love the mind lacks the energy to move. Everyone needs to love and be loved. To love and not loved, one will loose the drive to live.

Fizah has been a very committed staff to us. We might not be in the office most of the time, but with one hand of hers, she could manage all our works as instructed. Answering all our clients telephone calls and gave the supportive replies as needed. I term all her effort and services rendered to us and our clients as love. She gave it whole heartily with passion and all my clients could feel the sincerity of her work. However few months ago, her father whom she loved so much, passed away all of a sudden from a heart attack. Fizah is a single lady who has never fallen in love with any man before. To her, a father was like her darling, mentor and best friend. The lost of him was a terrible blow to the daughter. She has another younger sister who is happily marry and staying in a different state. Her mum is currently staying with her. I am sure, the mother is equally sad because the dad is no longer around to cheer the quiet home at the moment.

While talking to her, emotionally she felt like crying. The neglected lady had given too much love to others, but there was no love given to her in return. In the cycle of love, it comprises the earthly love, family love and intimate love. The earthly love is normally one way, when one has to give to others...like devoting to a job, career or business. The family love is where one can benefit the return of love again. In Fizah's case, the late father was the one who gave the love energy to her constantly. There is no intimate love for her as she isn't married.

My advice to Fizah... to love her mother more now. To hug and touch her mother more often, because the skin and skin contact is important to both. Hugging is distressing for all human beings. Secondly, it is never too late to fall in love, go out and seek her ideal man. Finally don't take me as a boss, treat me as a best friend who cares and understands. Before leaving the office, I gave her a tight hug which she missed so much. I believe her problem was solved.

Food for thought - "Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves." - Henri Frederic Amiel.

Overcoming fear - talking.

SS has been selling life insurance for seven years and yet still find difficult to master the art of selling. On several occasions I had seen her talking to prospects and presenting her sales. One of the drawback I noticed was her fear in expressing herself. To have a friendly chat she sounded normal but on actual presentation and sharing of ideas to prospects, she lacked her personal confidence to deliver.

On a recent article I read something on public speaking, I learned the subject of fear. Fear is an unpleasant feeling of perceived risk or danger, real or not. It functions to make us alert and ready for action should we encounter problems. Depending on the manner in which you handle your apprehension, fear can either stir you to action or immobilise you. Interesting...isn't it??

Ok! Let me go further to explain... Basically, there are two types of fear - empowering fear and disempowering fear. Empowering fear may include the fear of developing lung cancer through smoking. This would inhibit you from picking up the bad habit or impel you to kick your addiction. An empowering fear may also be termed as a "healthy" fear.

Of interest here is disempowering fear that can incapacitate aspects of how you function if you do not overcome your fear. How would you respond when you are to give an impromptu presentation to your prospects. More so when there are many people around. In the office, there might be several staffs working, in a restaurant there bound to have many other customers and in a prospect's home, you are surrounded by his family.

The truth is SS was not fearful of speaking to her prospects. Instead she was more apprehensive about the unfavourable scenarios that she had built in her mind. Meaning.. the surrounding disturbed her thought. If she was not confident and not focus, most likely she might loose the prospects' attention. Without she realising, her presentations were not convincing and inspiring to the listeners. No prospects or clients would buy if their doubts are there!

Suggestion to SS and to those who sell. Whenever you talk to another person who is listening, treat that particular person as very important to you at that moment of time. Forget the surrounding by blinding your thought but concentrate and focus only to the one who is listening. With some training, you would learn "to see but yet you don't see". Meaning...there might be hundred of people around your listener, you are not bother with the surrounding. Once you reach that level, you would be able to talk in confidence and conquering your fears and venturing out of your comfort zone.

I believe - "A good talker who speaks well is better than a dumb handsome or beautiful person".

How to stay rooted in my career?

Over a recent dinner with some of my fellow industry colleagues, they asked me this question... How to stay successfully and permanently in selling life insurance without distraction from outside influence? Is a good question because not many agents could stay long enough to deliver what have been promised to our clients. Along the way, there bound to have many obstacles and challenges which might deter one to continue selling. Rejections, lack of motivation, no inspiration, lonesome, no sales, counter offer of another career or job, family problem, health and personal problem and many more countless reasons.

Before being successful in our business, you have to burn your 'bridge of opportunity' first. To do that, the logical and sensible way is to earn much more than when you first started. Let say.. prior to you joining this business, you were earning only RM36,000 per year. Later when you are selling life insurance, your income has double after three year... the chance is, you might quit if someone offers a job that could triple your previous salary. This could happen, especially if you are facing some unhappiness and frustation in your business. The only way to make selling life insurance as a permanent career is to earn at least ten times more than what you had before. Once you reach that level, it would be very difficult for anyone to influence or even tempts you to leave. The reason is... you are too rich to be taken away from now. Money can change everything.. including our career and character. This is true facts of life again.

To be successful, just love and have passion on what you are doing. Success will come naturally. Success is a bit easier but permanent is more difficult in this business. I am successful in insurance because I love selling and I cannot quit because nobody can afford to pay me at this moment. In short I am rooted to it!

My belief - "Insurance company offers it's protection covers but I added love & passion to make them irresistable to purchase".

The young hearted has the courage.

I was once thrown with this interesting question in a party. It can be applicable to either sex. It goes like this... You have a willing partner who is prepared to make love with you. You have five choices to pick. 1.. To make love in a normal room. 2.. Make love in the bathtub. 3.. Make love in a car. 4.. Make love under the bushes in the night. 5.. Make love on the beach with a full moon.

Most of our friends, selected the normal room. A handful picked the bathtub and quite many like the car for some excitement. Nobody fancy the bushes and I was the only one who took the last choice for a change. I believe the way we opted for our fantasies, reflects the character of a person.

Those who selected the room were not risk taker, did not like changes, lived a routine way of life and had less challenges in their doing. The handful who picked the bathtub were also not risk taker but had the tendency to try changing if necessary. Might be playful but had some shyness in them. The many who darn to make love in the car were risk takers in an unlimited zone. They were mischievous and the naughty type. There was no taker for the bushes and I have no comment here. I strongly believe the one who had the courage to make love on the beach had a young heart. Must be a romantic guy who was not the least be bother on how others look at him.

What about you? Would appreciate, if you could let me know how you feel about your choice. You might be young but do you feel young in the first place. Your honest answer can reveal your heart.

Food for thought - "Courage is a special kind of knowledge: the knowledge of how to fear what ought to be feared and how not to fear what ought no to be feared." - David Ben-Gurion

Be a complete lover to her.

Loving a woman isn't complete, if the man could not make her happy and be satisfied on bed. As a man, you could be patience, tolerance, passionate, affectionate, caring and understanding to the woman you love. But behind the curtain, you are not wild and crazy, and lack the knowledge of sexual art...most likely your love bonding won't be stronger and happier.

I had a chance to learn from various brave ladies who shared the experiences of their sexual behaviour. Of them all, this SYT was the best. She would be more than satisfied if her playmate could make sure, she screams and yells...calling her love while in action...until she has to run away from him...during such time she has to grasp for air..going for the second round, the third round, the forth round and many rounds reaching her orgasms..the peak of sexual excitement.. her strong feeling of pleasure would end with Mmmmmmmm!!!...That would be enough darling.

To love our women, we have to touch her heart but don't forget her emotional excitement too. What Candice Bergen said is true .."I may not be a great actress but I've become the greatest at screen orgasms. Ten seconds of heavy breathing, roll your head from side to side, simulate a slight asthma attack and die a little." -

Laughter is the best medicine.

I had seen many of my clients suffering from cancer. Those who were weak minded seldom survived. Cancer is a scary word. Once they were diagnosed with it, the fear might even kill them and not the sickness. From my own personal experience and observation, those who were strong in mind had a better chance to recover. Most important is their belief that they could overcome this illness plus the confidence in their medical treatment. Science has proven that our brain has a natural chemical, called Endogenous Opioids which could self heal our body. It would only be released if the belief is there. To believe the medical treatment is effective and to have the confidence that you could overcome the sickness.

One good example I like to share here. Madam Loo is my daughter-in-law's mother, who suffered from breast cancer four years ago at the age of sweet sixties then. She removed her left breast reluctantly and later went for her chemo treatments. The cancer spread up to her throat and further chemo were needed. Though under heavy drugs and medication, she wasn't afraid to go through the painful process. Being playful and cheeky in nature, she could still make fun and laughter whenever we visited her. Our three grand children are her best friends who always stayed by her. She played along with them as children and laughing all the time without bothering how others looked at her. She loves to see me as well because I created more jokes and fun for her, as I am also another playful young old man.

Today Madam Loo is a healthy and cheerful lady who walks tall to see many other cancer patients in Singapore. She is a living legend for the sick. Her advices are to be happy, have the drive to live, believe in your personal strength and laugh as much as possible. I certainly agreed with her...cancer might not kill but fear yes.

Food for the heart - "The difference between an optimist and a pessimist? An optimist laughs to forget, but a pessimist forgets to laugh." - Tom Bodett

Life Insurance offers dignity

Last weekend I had a chance to drive to Muar, a small town 3hrs away from our city. I was actually doing a favour for a friend and his wife, who wanted to go home for the Chinese New Year holiday. My friend could no longer drive ever since he had a severe stroke few years ago. His wife was extremely happy that I could render such favour for them. During the journey, we had some good sharing and laughing, when this was spoken by the lady.

The husband, namely Lim AB was a self employed man before he retired. During those hay days when he was in business, he was always surrounded by many friends. They were all heavy drinkers and smokers. You could hardly see him not drinking even for one day a year. At the beginning, his wife was trying to control him on this bad habit. From habitual drinking, he became an alcoholic, one who could not live without alcohol. His hands trembled when alcohol was deprived. Prior to his alcoholic addiction, I managed to persuade this friend to effect a life policy through me. He was 'penny smart, pound foolish' because he could spend lavishly on his drinks and cigarettes but not prepared to have a bigger insurance cover for himself. With less than RM180 per month, I gave him the minimum protection. However he did not honour his word and in a very short period of time, he refused to continue to pay the premium.

Instinct tells me that Lim AB needed the protection more than I needed the sale. Knowing he was irresponsible, I approached his wife who was only a simple housewife. The following was spoken by this woman while she was in my car. She said, "Robert, if you had not patiently and logically explaining this life insurance needs to me 15 years ago, I won't have forced myself to pay this premium from my hard saved monthly allowance every month. Though the plan might be small in cover but when my husband got the stroke 4 years ago, that little payment from the insurance claim really meant a lot to us. We did not have to borrow, neither did we disturb our young working children then. We stood tall to face the outcome of uncertainties in life. After paying all those medical fees, I still have some cash in the bank currently. You have given me hope, dignity and confidence Robert. Thank you so much for your wisdom in understanding the facts of life." I was touched emotionally while driving on the highway with them.

Food for thought - "Enthusiasm is the best protection in any situation. Wholeheartedness is contagious. Give yourself, if you wish to get others"— Dr. David Seabury.

Words can heal & words can harm.

Selling life insurance is fun to me. Not only I get to know many clients, they later became closed friends for live. They almost tell me everything from financial to even their personal life. I had seen those as single and got marry eventually. Some married and later requested for divorce. While interacting with so many people, I learned a little about the facts of life here.

Those couples who could stay long enough to be happy are those who know how to say things right. They are the one who always used positive and encouraging words to their loved one. Not only during the day but in the late night as well. When I said during the day, it means not sleeping time. During the day, it is much easier to speak well beautifully to compliment each other. The fact is, when during the day everyone is clothed, there ought to be no shyness or shame. However on bed in the nite, when there is some form of intimacy, many tend to have some inferiority in themselves.

During the day, when a woman sees his husband or lover well dressed, she might say.."darling you look handsome this morning". That wonderful compliment would definitely make him delighted. Not on bed when the man is unclothed. She might sound to him, "Hi! you should put on some weight. Otherwise, how can you carry me physically with your size." Those are hurting statement which might create an inferior complex to the man. Or after a game of excitement when the man did not last long enough to appease the woman, out of dissatisfaction she might said, "Mmmmmm is a lousy one today dear." Again the man felt uncomfortable and he might even loose his sexual confidence. Sometime these little hiccups could jeopardise a good relationship.

An understanding couple should always apply good and meaningful words at all time. I picked up a few strong pointers from some successful lovers. Never degrade your partners while on bed. Be frank and truthful to each other. If you want your partner to improve his/her defects, give encouragement rather than by criticizing. These might work...."I love your strength darling. Please give me more. You are my strongman". Or "Today isn't a good day but I am sure you will do better tomorrow sweetheart because you are my hero". These are hidden words but are practical for all loving couples who wish to motivate each other. A good nite sleep can make a better tomorrow for everyone.

As Henri Nouwen said, “Words can bring consolation, comfort, encouragement, and hope. Words can take away fear, isolation, shame, and guilt. Words can reconcile, unite, forgive, and heal. Words can bring peace and joy, inner freedom and deep gratitude. Words, in short, can carry love on their wings. A word of love can be one of the greatest acts of love.”

The woman who needs the intimate love.

YF has been a great lady selling life insurance for many years. However the last two years was a difficult one, when money and incentives could neither move her. Over a discussion, she came to seek my brotherly advice.

This was what I told her. In selling life insurance effectively, love inwardly and outwardly are needed in our career. Basically love is classified into three levels as written in Buddhism. The first level is the earthly love when we offer our friendly love to those we meet in our day to day's life. In our career we termed this love, as meeting our prospects and clients whom we give the best services from our sincere heart. In this process, one tends to loose a lot of energy because it might be a one way giving, when others might reject your love or attention. The second level of love is from our family, parents, brothers and sisters, who are willing to understand and have concern for you. This is the level when you give love, you would receive love back as well. Nobody in this world could live without love. Others might reject you, but with the support from the family, you could survive again in life. The third level of love is the intimate love, when it involves a man and a woman who are a true loving couple. They give the 100% sincere love to each other without the slightest doubt. The only different between the third against the second and the first level is...the third level of love has the skin to skin contact which bond the lovers closer. The bonding creates positive energy which could overrule all rejections from the outside world. Its a paramount love of all loves in existence.

My good friend YF has only two levels of love, she has the first and the second. YF is a divorcee, a single mother to two growing children and supporting her two aged parents because she is the only daughter to them. Our business is a tiring one, as a lot of attention has to be rendered to our demanding clients. YF is the single breadwinner, who provides all the family financial needs. YF has been giving too much love all these years while selling life insurance, when she does not receive any love in return. She misses the intimate love from a good man to provide her the energy of life. She could be knowledgeable and willing to work, but without the intimate love to soothe her, nothing would drive her to move aggressively. The solution for my friend is...take a bit of time to reach up to an ideal man who should change her entire outlook of live.

Food for the thought - "In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love, you want the other person." - Margaret Anderson

A woman changes a man's life.

One of my relative has three sons. Let me just called them by John, Gary and Andrew. John and Gary as being older, were considered as well behaved children, completed their degrees. Andrew who was the youngest did not finished his education. He mixed with the wrong friends who taught him to smoke and drink. Being treated as a black sheep in his family, he did not like coming home most of the time.

Both John and Gary were very popular with girls, as they were handsome and had a sociable personality. John was married to a billionaire daughter and Gary was married to a politician daughter later. At the beginning their parents were so proud of their achievement, whereas Andrew was totally neglected. Out of desperation and frustration, Andrew went alone to England to seek for employment. However things changed, when they realised John and Gary were not to be seen. The reason was, John and Gary, both have powerful father-in laws who dictate their lives. Instead of staying with their own parents, they were compelled to be with the in-law houses. They spent more time with the in-laws, rather than with their parents. The parents were unhappy because they were not comfortable with their daughter-in-laws who were rich in status. Indirectly, they felt that their sons were being taken away from them.

While working in London, Andrew met another girl who works like him as foreigner worker. Though she is only a simple girl with little education, she taught Andrew the right attitude of life. She encouraged him to work hard, be responsible, to save and be caring to his parents. The friendship blossomed to romance, when Andrew married this loving and most understanding lady. The influence of his wife, made Andrew to be a better son who cares and be more thoughtful to his parents now. He sent regular cash allowances to his parents, the last time when his mum was admitted to the hospital...he insisted to pay all her medical bills, made periodical telephone calls home and came home every christmas to make the parents happy. A black sheep that turns over a new leaf, whom the least the parents expected. I feel great for them too.

Conclusion; "Woman is important for a man, she can change you in everyway possible. Be it the bad or the good".

One handed silence!!!

Maram shared this with me...Silence is Golden.

The soldiers are tired and lonely after spending weeks in enemy territory. To entertain them the Major called for this HOT number from the nearby town.

She came, danced and when the first dance was done, the soldiers went mad. They clapped for 5 minutes.

For her second number she stripped and danced in sheer bra and G strings. This time the applause went for 10 minutes.

The next number she danced topless, and this time the applause went on and on. The Major had to come on stage and ask them to quiet down for the grand finale.

For her last number, she was to strip completely and dance naked. The Major expected the soldiers to make enough noise to bring the roof down. But ten minutes later, there is no clapping and the dancer comes backstage.

The Major asks her, "What happened? How come there was no clapping this time?" She replied, "Major, how do you expect those poor boys to clap with only one hand!?"

Food for thought - "Silence is the virtue of fools." - Francis Bacon