Monday, December 22, 2008

Caught in a tight situation.

I love talking and equally I like body massage. Every week without fail, I distress and pamper myself with a good massage. Last time I fancy the Thai traditional type, but lately I think the Chinese traditional and leg reflexology are more relaxing. I spend one hour on the leg, and one and half hour on my entire body from head to toe done by female masseurs.

As usual this afternoon on a beautiful Sunday, I was being massaged by my regular masseur. Half way the massage, I felt a little upset in my stomach. There was gases in my intestine and I felt like farting. To fart it out would be nice when gases were being released. However I was controlling my 'breaking wind' as she was rubbing my body gently. On the other hand when I was resisting my fart from being released, I tend to tighten my body muscle which I should not. The purpose of massaging is to relax our muscle for better blood circulation. The worst was, when she started to rub my two buttocks while I held my fart from farting. I was caught in a difficult situation...the sensation was nice while she rubbed my rear pelvic area but my stomach gases were also developing to a higher intensity of being blown out sooner.

I could not relax as my mind was being disturbed. Though my eyes were closed, I was actually awoke. Few questions were in my mind. The first...should I just fart out the heavy gases which might be smelly. Imagine her face was directly over my backside. If I fart at that moment, she would be shocked and it is not a good manner to fart with someone around. The second choice... tell her I am farting and please excuse me. However I felt shameful to tell her my problem. The third choice...remain silent but have to suffer for another one hour. Puzzle and puzzle!!! I didn't not know what was the best way to solve this problem!!! It sounds stupid but believe me, all of us had encountered such similar situation before. Some managed to escape without offending others or perhaps you might not bother but just fart as much as you like. Would like to open to readers who might have a better way to behave under such circumstances.

"When a fart is suppressed the gas may be absorbed by the gut. Most of the hydrogen and other gases eventually escape in the breath, but luckily the smell does not get through".
— Adam Hart-Davis


Anonymous said...

Hi Robert,

I can understand that Massage cause "fart" ..I would say it out that I would fart due to the massage and would want to be excused to do so.
The massager would understand their customer's requirement.
You may try to be excused during the massage and see what happens.

Red Lavender

Robert Foo said...

Hi RL..

Sometimes we had short fart which is easlier to control. But when is a long fart which contains a lot of stomach won't be easy for a massage that took 2.5 hrs to complete. I think your suggestion is ideal.