Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Love has no comparison.


Is sad to see many broken marriages as I go along working in my career. With the current environment, when both husband and wife work, many misunderstanding of life do happen. I saw them as my clients when they first got marry and later sought for separation. I witnessed many life insurance agents who came into this career but ended unhappily with filing for divorce.

From my observation, most broken marriages were affected by lack of understanding in love relationship. The first rule in any relationship, love has no comparison. The man cannot compare how much his woman loves him nor the woman compares her earning against her man. If they do have these emotional thoughts, certain amount of dissatisfaction would definitely arise. Either the man might be upset, like accusing her for not spending enough time for him. Or the woman might degrade her man who is earning less than her. Comparison is the threat to good relationship.

Second rule in a relationship, there is no winning and no losing because love is not a contest. You love more to win over your partner and not to love more for winning to possess your lover. After all love cannot be measured in any way, neither can you quantify the amount.

To fall in love is easy but to maintain in love is difficult. Either you learn from your mistakes or learn from another person mistakes to avoid a happy relationship. I sincerely hope the above information could be relevant to those who are still in love.

Food for the heart -"There are two worlds; the world that we can measure with line and rule, and the world that we feel with our hearts and imaginations." - Leigh Hunt

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr Heart to Heart talk,

Those that cannot be measured soon will need to be measured some how,somewhere...so I started the
"5 words to describe your relationship"...and for the first glance my heart blurt few ..but limit to 5 first...

Experienced
1- deceit
2- no respect
3- friendship
4- to give, not takes
5- mentally tortured

Search for
1- genuine
2- trust
3- sincere honesty
4- soul-mate
5- spiritual

Observed
1- tired(becoming fake)
2- empty, uncomfortable
3- fear
4- jealous
5- need to please(not sincere)

Fear
1- felt rejected
2- deceit
3- unintentional behaviors
4- cannot trust
5- lifeless(dead, no feeling)

Bonus
1- To change
2- Energetic
3- Agreeable
4- Perfect
5- Aware of new requirements

Reduce/Donts
1- Ego
2- status reviews
3- Yell at each other
4- curse
5- "Ownership" syndrome

Do s
1- Self Control in all aspect
2- Achieve one new things occasionally
3- Spontaneous and joke
4- Grow together and survive
5- Review to improve

Hope this will make a different view of how to manage relationships...remember....we cannot do it alone...things dont just happen by coincidence...it happens because we allow them to happen...

sincerely,
Red Lavender

Robert Foo said...

Hi Red Lavender...

Bravo!!! Fantastic!!! Unbelieveable!!! You must had gone through an interesting path of love & romance to understand the meaning of a good relationship. I always remember, mistakes are our teachers of life...including love mistakes.

Thank you for sharing such wonderful piece of information. Can you allow me to post them into my next title to let the world to read and learn my dear?

Regards

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr Heart to Heart talk,

Yes why not...please post, I see we are all learning from time to time,meeting the people with experiences etc...so those who likes to write might as well share....
The path of life I've been thru are summarized in the 5 ways :) and its quite a journey for my age.But then we grow mature and wiser as we celebrate our yearly birthdays...

sincerely,
Red Lavender

Robert Foo said...

Hi Red Lavender...

Thank you. It was so thoughtful of you.