Appreciation not condemn.

CF, a young lad who made his first trip to Shanghai for a holiday alone to visit his elder brother. Before taking off from home, his mother who had been to Shanghai before, briefed his son regarding the China airport city transportation. Upon arrival to the airport, the best way to reach his brother house was by the official taxis piling along the front terminal. By the clocking of the taxi meter, the estimated fare should not be more than yuan 180 for an one hour journey.

The next morning, CF called home through Skype, letting his mother knew that he had arrived safely. I happened to be around over hearing the son and the mum conversation. CF sounded a bit sad and frustrated, because he was taken a ride by a con limousine claiming to be the official taxi from the authority. Instead of charging a fare of not more than 180, the aggressive Chinese driver insisted a fare of 380 from the poor innocent CF. Though CF is an oversea Chinese but he was cheated by another local Chinese.

Instead of having sympathy over the child, the mother scolded furiously over the mike near to the computor. These were her angry words, "You were so stupid!! I had told you before you left that the fare is only 180 and yet you paid 380. You are brainless. Stupid and stupid!!!"

Over hearing their online chat, I could only listen and calmed the mother down. In empathy I thought, the lad was not stupid but rather was his mum. Perhaps he wasn't smart enough to understand the canniness of the outside world. After all, he wasn't a regular traveller and the first time to this huge city. I think the mum was stupid for not being able to understand the frustration of his mind. He had been forced and cheated by a stranger. If the mother could have being a smarter mum, she should have said, "Alright son. Is ok! Now that you have arrived safely there, I will feel better for you. I hope you will learn from this lesson coz I know you are my intelligent boy."

Lesson I learned...is always easy to criticise and condemn at the slightest mistakes but not easy to offer sincere compliment and appreciation when goodness has been done.

Food for the thought - "Most of us, swimming against the tides of trouble the world knows nothing about, need only a bit of praise or encouragement -- and we will make the goal." - Jerome P. Fleishman

Can I ask sex directly...isn't offensive.

June is only 23, just finished her degree and is working now. She is one of my relative only daughter, simple, intelligence, attractive, and very mature for her age. As a smart girl, she always like mixing with older and wiser people for learning. Together with little darling whom she adores, we had a chance to mix freely recently on a shopping spree.

Over a chat, June who is also my keen blog reader, related my recent title, "Can I ask sex directly?" Her answer to us was a positive 'yes!' We both were stunned and surprised by her affirmation.

This was her explanation. If there is a gentleman and an admirable friend, who is brave to ask sex from me directly... in my heart, I would feel proud and excited. I feel great because I must have the sexiness and beauty to attract this man. Sexiness and attractiveness are beauty for woman. If I could not draw and capture attention on man, then perhaps I might not have the beauty of a sexy lady. Next...if the man who asks is sincere and I have the love and feeling over him, I would say 'yes' to him. To me, a sincere man must be prepared to take all responsibilities if he has the intention to have sex with me. Asking this direct question is not offensive to me. Further more, love & sex are important for couples before marriages.

WoW!!! I didn't know the younger generation thinks likewise. They have different thinking and feeling. Is a wrong to me but is a right to them. To my brother who might still be reading my blog, I think you should attempt your unoffensive sex question to the deserving lady in waiting.

To June, you are right in every sense. You have the sexiness to attract by the sight but don't forget the smell is equally important. Little darling and me could smell your body odor which you did not realize yourself. Most people concentrate the external personality and fail to adjust the inner physical. Suggest not only you buy those beautiful dresses, take a look with those body lotions or perfumes which could definitely attract more admirers for you. Remember the five senses of man; sight, hear, smell, taste and touch. You have achieved attraction from sight but overlook your smell in some way. We sincerely hope you could correct the necessary.

Food for the thought - "Sexual love is undoubtedly one of the chief things in life, and the union of mental and bodily satisfaction in the enjoyment of love is one of its culminating peaks. Apart from a few queer fanatics, all the world knows this and conducts its life accordingly; science alone is too delicate to admit it." - Sigmund Freud

Can & May!

WY Yap is an international traveller whose business requires him to work all over the world. As a man who needs to move so frequently, he has all the necessary telecommunication tools to be mobile. Over a friendly chat, he complained about the telemarketers or the marketing persons who are so unprofessional in their telephone approaches. Not speaking confidently is one issue but not knowing the different of an oversea call connected is ridiculous. Meaning... when one is calling a mobile hand phone which is roaming on oversea, the ringing tune is always slightly different from a local ringing. On roaming, the receiver has to pay for the calls received. No person will like to receive an unwanted prospecting call. Right?? (Note... for all salesperson.. please be aware of such information). If a telemarketer or marketing person is sensible, they should immediately disconnect those particular calls to avoid unnecessary disturbance to their prospects.

The saddest thing was...even WY Yap who accidentally picked up those silly calls, he repeatedly told them that he was speaking from oversea, the callers would still insist to continue talking. To make matter furious, the callers used this statement..."Can I speak with Mr Yap?" or at time "Can I speak to Mr Yap's wife?" 'Can' is a very authoritative word which is demanding and forceful. As a verb, 'can' in this application did not sound friendly and obliging. More so the callers were total strangers to him. They should use the verb 'may'..."May I speak to Mr Yap?" The may is softer to listen...with meaning like... to be allowed or permitted.

I totally agreed to Yap's explanation. Our marketing people are weak in every sense. They do not understand the ethics of telephone communication and their understanding of words application is rather weak. I hope the above could be an eye's opener to all people who handle sales and marketing.

When you are in love and have intention to date a new girlfriend, say..."May I take you for a dinner?" or "May I surrender my heart to you?" Not when you confess to her, you should say.. "Can I marry you my little darling?"

The verbs May and Can are simple words but they do have a lot of meaning in usage. Unless one uses them right, the end result might not be effective. The chat with WY Yap was definitely very fruitful and benefiting. May be some readers out there might offer some comments too!

Food for the thought - "If you can imagine it, You can achieve it. If you can dream it, You can become it. — William Arthur Ward.

"What a day may bring, a day may take away" — Thomas Fuller, (1608-1661), English clergyman, antiquarian.

Always see the good part of a person.

In my career as a professional life insurance agent, we try to be perfect on our job. Though I always attempt not to make mistakes, errors on my work do happen at time. I could be perfect most of the time, when I tried to please and be helpful to all my clients, but if I failed once or made one silly mistake, nobody is going to be happy with me. This phenomenon had been disturbing me for awhile...asking myself why our world is so unforgiving. Good work are seldom appreciated. Whereas mistakes are punishable or most noted in every way. One could have done ninety nine goods but when a single mistake is seen, that person is considered as unprofessional and unsatisfactory. So sad!!

While on my recent oversea trip, I befriended two love birds who happened to stay in the same hotel of mine. On the first day itself, I was admiring their relationship and their intimate. They were loving and romantic to my eyes. Wherever they went, they both would be holding hands or hugging each other. I could see them chatting endlessly all the time. I believe they were madly in love.

Surprisingly they were from the same city I came from and coincidentally we took the same flight home. We managed to check in the flight together and got the same seating besides as well. During the first hour on board, the three of us were having laughter and sharing. As this was a budget flight we had to order and pay our food and drink. We were seated in the centre row as arranged. By the time, the flight stewards came to us, all the best available food were sold to other passengers at the front and the back. Leaving us the least not tasty packet food left. After that, things changed for the worst between the two lovers beside me. They were having a slight argument in their language I did not understand. By the facial, I could sense the lady was unhappy over the man. We no longer talk for the rest of the journey. I knew unpretentiously something sour had occurred, when I could see the lady was closing her eyes with both arms crossed, showing her confrontation against her man.

When our flight landed much later, I had a chance to speak with the man over the misunderstanding on board earlier. His girlfriend was upset as she could not purchase the food she wanted. She was angry with him because he did not take her instruction to buy on line those meals when he registered the booking on the web. Should he had ordered those food on booking, the flight would have assured of their meals. According to him, he hadn't done such ordering before on line, except the booking of flight and destination. It was not his real intention not to order those meals in the first place. However he felt bad not being able to get the best meals for his lady on board. It was the last part of their holiday and yet he could not complete it with full satisfaction for his love. He was so sad too.

The above incident was truly an unhappy ending for these love birds' holiday. The man was trying so hard to please his love from start till the end. He was there all the time for her, escorting her everywhere, showering her all she needed, creating laughter and fun to amuse her, offering total affection and care, bought whatever she wanted, obliged her in every way if possible and yet when he made and being caught for one unintentional error, she throw her frustration and anger to the man who loves her so much. Back to my earlier statement again..."ninety nine rights cannot beat one wrong in life"....including love and romance. We talk so much about love... when love has got tolerance, patience, forgiving, unconditional giving, least expectation and always giving... but most of us fail to remember to apply what we have learned. After all, nobody is perfect in the first place...including this man who tried so hard to love. I had invited both this couple to read my blog and I sincerely hope both of them would forgive and forget what had happened. Why pick on the one wrong, when there are so many beautiful strength and value of a person. See the better side of him, and you will admire his potential in life.

Food for the thought - "When a deep injury is done us, we never recover until we forgive".

I am home from holiday.

Hi everybody! I am back and home sweetheart home again. I left on Tuesday to a neighbouring country where I purposely got lost to 'no where'. It was a relaxing holiday when I didn't bother about time and place. I used to go on tour to most part of the world when upon returning I tend to be more tired than before leaving. As far as I am concerned, on tour isn't considered to be a holiday but rather is seeing places of interest. One has to move so fast when you might not have enough sleep while touring. Not when I took this to 'no where' holiday. I woke up any time I liked, took late easy breakfast, window shopping with no buying, ate when I saw some interesting local food, relaxed at poolside to admire those lovely bodies, beach and sand, spa and massage to my leisure and walked aimlessly without any particular destinations. It was like seeing the world go round, especially when most people were on holiday mood now. Although I was alone but the world never let me to be lonesome because as long as I had the heart to meet and talk with people, there were new friends to be found. Smiles were the lauguages to meet people. Whenever I was asked...where I was from?? My rely was...I am from Planet Earth. Surprisingly some were so innocent to ask again...where is Planet Earth?? I could never imagine there are still many people in this world who do not know where is Planet Earth. Jokingly I told them....Planet Earth is a place where all people smile and live happily together.

Food for the thought - "There are hundreds of lauguages in the world but a smile speaks them all" - Frank A. Clark

What is sex to you?

I am going for a holiday tomorrow and taking an early flight. Be away for a few days, relax and get myself lost into the unknown. Just was I about to sleep, this brother disturbed me again. He sent a question to me on text. It was written..."Bro, what is sex to you and how you see it?" By right, he should be asking more on selling rather than these three letters word of curiosity. Since he isn't doing so well in sales, I might as well teach him a bit on sex. Perhaps when he understands sex deeper, he might do well in selling because sex is related to selling. Funny isn't it!!!

I replied him briefly with some thoughts on it. I think sex comes in many ways to different people and culture. Most take sex as vulgar, indecent, offensive, sinful or for the sake of lust. Out of lust, most people satisfy themselves through sex and have intercourse. This is temporary satisfaction of desire on sexual needs and wants. As long as two different opposite sexes agree, they can have sex without fuss over it. However, I am in different grouping my dear brother. To me...love and sex got to come together. With love come first, sex will be more beautiful, meaningful and lasting. Sex with true love, creates positive energy which can move all obstacles of life. Love with sex bonds a relationship closer. It enhances the vital force of the ying and yang energies or in Chinese, we called them as Chi. The unimpeded circulation of chi and a balance of its negative and positive forms in the body are held to be essential to good health in traditional Chinese belief.

Through the air and spirit of the chi (Ying & Yang), sex lives is happier and merrier. Brother, believe me ...when you heart is happy and contented, you tend to work harder and smarter all the way. Your facial will be brighter and your eyes will be sharper. Just few days ago, I met a lady doctor who is at her late forty and still a spinster. Her face was dull and her skin was aging. She didn't look a happy person to me. I think she lacks love and sex. An unsatisfied person is always an unhappy person. Brother, you have came the rightful age to be married and yet you still remain single, I am worried that something is missing in your system. Yes! You could have got the lust for sex when you hit and run, which were temporary of no benefit. You lack also the chi badly. Without the balance of life energy through love and sex, I am sorry to say...your personal life would definitely be affected in some ways.

Is getting too late now. If you are still interested to go further on the subject of sex, please arrange a special class of ten person (5 males & 5 females), I promise to discuss this topic with all of you again. I talk life insurance and I can share love & sex too.

Food for the thought - "Sexual love is undoubtedly one of the chief things in life, and the union of mental and bodily satisfaction in the enjoyment of love is one of its culminating peaks. Apart from a few queer fanatics, all the world knows this and conducts its life accordingly; science alone is too delicate to admit it." - Sigmund Freud

Caught in a tight situation.

I love talking and equally I like body massage. Every week without fail, I distress and pamper myself with a good massage. Last time I fancy the Thai traditional type, but lately I think the Chinese traditional and leg reflexology are more relaxing. I spend one hour on the leg, and one and half hour on my entire body from head to toe done by female masseurs.

As usual this afternoon on a beautiful Sunday, I was being massaged by my regular masseur. Half way the massage, I felt a little upset in my stomach. There was gases in my intestine and I felt like farting. To fart it out would be nice when gases were being released. However I was controlling my 'breaking wind' as she was rubbing my body gently. On the other hand when I was resisting my fart from being released, I tend to tighten my body muscle which I should not. The purpose of massaging is to relax our muscle for better blood circulation. The worst was, when she started to rub my two buttocks while I held my fart from farting. I was caught in a difficult situation...the sensation was nice while she rubbed my rear pelvic area but my stomach gases were also developing to a higher intensity of being blown out sooner.

I could not relax as my mind was being disturbed. Though my eyes were closed, I was actually awoke. Few questions were in my mind. The first...should I just fart out the heavy gases which might be smelly. Imagine her face was directly over my backside. If I fart at that moment, she would be shocked and it is not a good manner to fart with someone around. The second choice... tell her I am farting and please excuse me. However I felt shameful to tell her my problem. The third choice...remain silent but have to suffer for another one hour. Puzzle and puzzle!!! I didn't not know what was the best way to solve this problem!!! It sounds stupid but believe me, all of us had encountered such similar situation before. Some managed to escape without offending others or perhaps you might not bother but just fart as much as you like. Would like to open to readers who might have a better way to behave under such circumstances.

"When a fart is suppressed the gas may be absorbed by the gut. Most of the hydrogen and other gases eventually escape in the breath, but luckily the smell does not get through".
— Adam Hart-Davis

Can I ask for sex directly?

I have a lot of friends, clients and colleagues who like to seek my elderly advices. Today, one buddy colleague sent over a text message. He wrote..."Brother, when u ask for sex from a girl directly..do u think it's a right move or will it offend her?

Instead of asking selling tips, he seek for something even more interesting. My reply to him was...read my blog and let me explain for everyone to know as well.

Courting girls is like prospecting for sales. A good salesperson knows when a prospect is sold. No prospect would say he wants to buy. Neither could the salesperson asks whether prospect wants to purchase. The salesperson has to motivate and inspire his prospect to be interested in buying. Salesperson has to detect prospect's buying signals through body's language and facial expression. Once signals are confirmed, salesperson gently and subtly leads prospect to close the sale by signing the dotted line. Follow by prospect is too willing to open his pocket to pay what is necessary. The sale is closed with both parties shaking hands with smiles all round.

For the brother who is reading this now. Don't ever ask your girl directly for sex, especially if she is not your girlfriend yet. If you do...you might end yourself with two tight slaps on your face. Motivate and inspire her with your love stories. Be a hero to her first... expect a little and give as much as possible willingly. Romance and have fun with her. All these might be termed as love making when no sex is involved. Along the way, please observe her body's language and facial expression. Is she responding your closeness? Can you touch her hand? Does she allows you to hug her? And later kiss her gently and softly. If these are possible without objection, young man (shame on you...35 still so innocent), I am sure, your little darling is ready for you to be carried onto bed. You don't need to ask for sex. It just comes naturally because love and romance has magic. The intimacy is concluded with both parties smiling with love all round.

Food for the thought - "The Englishman can get along with sex quite perfectly so long as he can pretend that it isn't sex but something else." - James Agate

Formula to live a longer life.

I was having a haircut in the barber shop, when I noticed an elderly old man having a good time chatting with the barbers. He was the only one talking and the rest were listening to his wisdom. I was told his age is 87 years young. Though his frame is small and skinny but his eyes were bright and his face still has the smiling grow.

Immediately after my haircut, I went forward to shake his hand. Spontaneously he raised both his hands to reach mine too. I offered my sincere congratulation for being so strong and healthy, living right up to this golden age. Politely I asked him, "Uncle..can you tell us your formula to stay and live healthily?" The man put up a broad smile and said, "I eat normal food but little is enough. I don't take supplement either for all these years. I don't smoke and drink. My only exercise is regular walking which I like. To stay healthy...never have hatred in the heart. Be forgiving and give as much as you can." It sounded so simple as that, but yet it is so difficult for most of us. Life is actually simple and is only mankind who makes it complicating. I was glad to have met this wise man who had enlightened me.

Food for the thought - "Early to bed and early to rise, Makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise" — Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)

Sincere appreciation.

A dear friend send over a text message to me. It was well written as......

Time goes fast.

Life asks so much.

No wonder friends get out of touch!

But in our hearts;

deep,

true,

unseen,

friendship stays forever & u will stay forever & ever.

I felt nice to know this friend who was thoughful enough to remember me. In return, I replied her this message...

My dear should be....

Love goes so fast.

Mind asks so much.

No wonder this darling gets out of touch!

But in my heart;

deep,

true,

unseen,
My love stays forever for you coz I love u so much.

The next minute, she called to say my message had melted her heart. Life has so much of fun, is only whether you know how to live with it. She made me felt nice and I appreciated her with more.

Food for the thought -"Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is shown in acts." - Henri Frederic Amiel

Meet & talk to people.

In my last 27 years of selling life insurance, I attended countless agency and company meetings. All trainers would tell their agents...to be successful in this career is to see enough people. They applied motivation and inspiration but the bottom line is to see the people and see more people. If it doesn't work, the next easiest way is to offer tempting carrots to the agents. The carrots come in the form of incentives to tickle agents to see more people and to get more sales.

Is logical to gain more sales is to to see more people. This statement is easy spoken and written but how to see people and continue to see people endlessly is the most difficult task. To see people you know is easy but to see strangers is difficult. Is also easy for trainers to instruct agents to see more people but to show an easy way to see more people isn't shown. Perhaps they do not know as well.

I think the right way to see people is first to enjoy seeing people. Are you the type of person who like to talk? Next...to you enjoy talking to entertain your listeners? If you have these two qualities in you, seeing people is as easy as ABC. Most agents fail in our business is because they only know how to talk on the products and services, and do not have the ability to interact to make people like them. Nobody like to listen to your sales. Everyone loves to be entertained and be amused. So if you could make people laugh and have fun out of your talk, seeing people is definitely enjoyable. The only way to learn this art of talking is to practise in the open. Go to the parks or shopping malls, pick any strangers you feel comfortable and just keep talking until they become your friends. I assure you, in no time talking and seeing people are such a wonderful hobby and interest to you. Who knows...you might meet your ideal man or woman while talking there!!

There is a short Chinese phrase spoken- "Have a sweet mouth that talks until birds could come down from the tree". That's how I sweet talk my little darling who flew to me.

Mobile phone can cause misunderstanding.

Can you live without a mobile phone? I think....I can't! And I believe you can't either. It is supposed to be a communication tool for the world but it can create a nuisance and at times could cause more harm than good. For instance...if you are not careful with writing proper text messages...the receiver might misunderstand your meaning in words. Many thoughts and feeling could easily be sent but to write meaningfully and being understood might be difficult. Many times had I offended someone without me realizing myself. I had on several occasions quarrelled with little darling on text messaging not properly expressed in texting on my handphone.

Each time when we call someone on handphone, we expect the other parties to answer. If for some reasons, the calls are not responded, most likely we tend to feel uneasy. Some might even call again for few times, wondering why their calls are not picked up over on the other side. There could be many reasons...the main reason is...the caller at that time is free but the receiver might not. The fact is...nobody is at this moment not doing anything...everyone has to do something. So when a mobile rings...it depends whether the receiver is free at that minute of time.

When I am on urgent business or discussion, I usually change my handphone to silent mode. The purpose is to avoid distraction and to concentrate on my work with those who are around me. However sometimes it might cause confusion with callers who wondered why I wasn't picking up their calls. Especially from my little darling when I did not answer her caring calls for a longer period. The misunderstand disturbed her emotion and could cause anxiety for no reason. Many business opportunities could be affected and many romances could be broken if the usage of mobile phone is not properly understood.

I hope all my friends, clients, relatives, loved one and little darling know...when I don't pick your calls immediately...I am actually on urgent matters and definitely I have not forgotten you all. All calls are very important to me coz I know...when you call me...you are already thinking of me. Just give me a bit of time...I rest assure you...I promise...I will return the calls back to you later.

Though the mobile phone might create some nuisance and misunderstanding, in proper usage it offers more convenient and benefits than without. It looks like whether I like it or not..it has to be with me for the rest of my live here on planet earth. Don't you think so???

Food for the thought - "There are four ways, and only four ways, in which we have contact with the world. We are evaluated and classified by these four contacts: what we do, how we look, what we say, and how we say it." - Dale Carnegie

Confused in love..spiritual & physical.

YF is a divorcee in her mid forty with two teenage growing children. She is a successful self employed attractive and intelligent professional. At the moment she is caught in between the spiritual and the physical world. She loves her religion and follows strictly by its rules and at the same time she is in love silently with a man who is married. The man is loving, understanding, caring with all qualities to be worthy for her. Except he is married with all his children already grown up. To love him whole heartily, she is guilty of herself and to forget him is painful. Not doing anything is also difficult because the thought would always be there for holiness and him. Though she looks happy to others but in actual fact she is unhappy and frustrating. Some friends discourage her to drop the man and some said yes. The different opinions confused her more. More so the man is patiently waiting for her without forcing her in any way if she is not ready. They are currently good friends without intimacy involved. However deep down in YF heart, she needs a man to hold and hug her tightly because she has plenty of love to give. After all no intimate love is "complete" without the warm of a man and woman. She is crying and wish there is an answer to her sorrow. This is a true story between spiritual and physical love.

Perhaps there are someone out there who may be able to enlighten YF. Your comment is most appreciated. Food for the thought - "When people are taken out of their depths they lose their heads, no matter how charming a bluff they may put up." - Source Unknown

Cold calling is hardwork but it helps.

All successful salesperson start with the cold calls first. It takes a lot of guts and courage to do it! Without starting from this strange and scary approaches, no salesperson could understand what is selling. I started with cold calls in my first job in selling 40 years ago.

Two days ago while I was having dinner with little darling at an open food court, a young girl at the most not more than twenty years old, was trying to sell her products to us. She was carrying a light bag, both hands holding packets of sock. Her face showed she was scared and shy. I gave her some encouragement and persuaded her to talk. We were trying to listen her presentation but she was fumbling nervously and not a word could be heard. We gave her time to finish her words and we politely told her we really don't need those products. Although her selling wasn't successful but for sure I could see, it was a real achievement for her. Perhaps it was her first cold call sale, when someone allowed her to complete her talk. She might not know, she had made the mistakes of not speaking confidently and clearly, but at least she had the braveness to see strangers which matters most in selling. Deep down in my heart, I knew she would make it if she continues to see more strangers persistently.

In selling and marketing, it's not how much you know on theory and knowledge, it's on how much you understand the practical part of it. Theory and knowledge could be taught but the practical has to be done by yourself. Most salesperson fail in selling because they have not overcome the fear in cold calls. Especially selling life insurance which needs total mastery in selling. I am glad, I started cold calls before venturing into the natural market, which later developed me into an effective life insurance agent. For those who are currently selling life insurance and have not done cold call before, I suggest is good you should try it now.

A poem... "Hardwork Helps"

Hardwork is like the stairs.

Luck is like a lift.

Lift may fail sometimes,

But whatever may be the occasions,

Stairs will always get u to the top.

Luck might help u once,

Hardwork helps always.

All ladies must read.

On Nov 29 2008, my title was..."All men must read". One reader, RL suggested for women as well. Perhaps this one might sound good for today..."All ladies must read".

In the world of romance, one single rule also applies to ladies. Make us, men happy. Do something he likes, and you ladies get points. Do something he dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get points for doing something he expects. Sorry, that's the way our game is played. Here is a guide to the point system and hope all women like them:

Simple duties

You get up first, and let him sleep longer (+5)

He gets up first, and you sleep longer (0)

Breakfast is ready when he is awake(+10)

He has to prepare breakfast (0)

You eat together with him (+1)

He eats alone and you do your thing (-1)

You listen his morning chat (+10)

You talk more than him before he leaves the house (-1)

You hug and kiss him (+5)

You smile (+1)

You do nothing while he leaves home (-5)

Social Engagements

You stay by her side the entire party (-1)

You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with the surrounding (+1)

You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a male (-2)

Named David (-4)

David is a playboy (-6)

David is single and is handsome (-10)

David is your ex-boyfriend (-500)

You dress attractively with admiration (+2)

You dress attractively and speak confidently with his friends (+5)

You hold his hand while socialising with male friends (+5)

You introduce him as your sweetheart to males (+10)

His birthday

You forget his birthday (-1000)

You take him out to dinner (0)

You take him out to dinner and listen to his stories (+10)

Buy him a present (+5)

Add a smile, hug & kiss (+10)

Plus Sex included (+500)

A night out

You take him to a movie (0)

You take him to a movie he likes (+4)

You take him to a movie you hate (-10)

You take him to a movie you like (+2)

Plus holding his arm while watching the show (+10)

Whispering in his ear...Thank you & I love you (+100)

Before the show ends...promise him sex is later (+1000)

Enjoy the "big" question

He asks, "Are you happy with me?" (Yes +10)

You hesitate in responding (-10)

You reply, "Now?" (-35)

You reply, "Yes, especially on bed" (+1000)

Communication

When he wants to talk about an issue, you listen (+10)

You listen, for over 30 minutes (+100)

You listen without interrupting (+500)

You change his subject (-1000)

Now what chance do you have???

Man is man!! We have difference characters, emotion and feeling. Just for the sake of laughing, let me share these with the ladies. Five Rules For Men To Follow For A Happy Life:

1. Get a woman who helps at home, cooks and clean up.

2. Get a woman, who can make you smile and laugh.

3. Get a woman who you can trust and who does not lie to you.

4. Get a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.

5. It is very important that these four women do no know each other.

Remember...Its just a joke ladies!!!!

Ineffective communication causes misunderstanding.

Yesterday early morning, Jennifer, one of my client called. She wanted to make sure I am still alive and are still selling life insurance. According to her, her husband Mr Yim received one of our company telemarketing call, informing him that I had expired. The word... 'expired' could either mean I am dead or my contract with my principle company has expired. I was shocked to hear her news and she felt so relieve to know I am still around. I could not believe, my company would say such uneventful and meaningless statement. I was very upset and without ado, I immediately confronted the relevant parties in the office.

All our telemarketing calls are recorded whenever a telephone call is made. Upon checking and verifying, this was what happened and transpired. The telemarketing teams were trying to promote some new products for our existing clients. Randomly they picked names and called our clients. As most of the telemarketers are young and inexperienced, they spoke with scripts pre-written without the natural flow of words.

One part of the script lines were written as... "We are calling you sir, because the agency promotional month had expired.....". Instead the telemarketer said..."We are calling you sir, because the promotional agent had expired...". Her voice lacked confidence, not clear and the flow was uneven. She made mistakes without realizing herself. There is a lot of difference between "agency promotional month had expired" and "promotional agent had expired". She had missed out the word, month and twisted those few words accordingly.

From the recording, they could hear and listen to their own mistakes. Although it might seem a simple error but the poor communication caused ill feeling, misunderstanding or miss interpretation, anger and frustration. If unaware and not corrected, in the long run, it might lead to more damages to all parties concerned.

I am glad those whom I had spoken to like, Yen Ling, Rachel Ong and Ann Lim from the marketing team, took the initiative to investigate the above matter seriously. I could be upset for a short while on this error of communication, but certainly I would not blame them for this unintentional mistake because no body is perfect in this world, moreso they are still young and are inexperienced in work. Especially speaking on phone to a stranger. It takes a lot of training and assistance before one can master the confidence. In order to help my colleagues, I offer myself willingly to a half day talk on effective communication with them.

This is the letter written by Rachel to her boss Ann Lim....

Dear Ann,
Just spoken to Mr. Robert Foo, I have apologised to him and Mr Foo shared some of his findings and experiences for our better improvement. Meanwhile, I have called Mr. Yim and apologised on this matter also. Mr. Foo shared some of his tips which can help to get better attention from customers over the phone. We will brief all TMR again on how important it is to speak to customers with proper language and the meaning of the words. We need to ensure our TMR maintain their professionalism. If possible, I suggest that we can invite Mr. Robert Foo to come over our call centre again for his sharing. I found his sharing is quite useful.
Thanks & Regards, Rachael Ong

Ann Lim had invited me to talk with her staffs on the 9th January 2009. Yes! Shine or rain I will be there because effective speaking and communication is important in life.

Specially for the marketing team - "Your ability to communicate is an important tool in your pursuit of your goals, whether it is with your family, your co-workers or your clients and customers." - Les Brown

An interesting life till death.

I have more younger friends than the older ones. In fact I feel more comfortable talking with those younger than me. They listen and easily get excited with my sharing all the time. To talk with the older one I need a lot of patience and understanding. Otherwise I would be lectured easily by them.

Just like this particular incident when I last visited an old childhood friend. He is Steven who runs an old sundry shop in PJ. We grew up together and studied in the same school. When he was young, he was an active and a jovial person. However as he grew older, he became self-centred, arrogance, stingy, unfriendly, unloving and lonely. The shop of 30 years he owns, did not change a bit but rather looks very run down. I hardly saw any customer buying from his store when I was in his place. There was no assistant and he practically had to manage his business all by himself. He still drove the same Madza saloon car which was bought new 35 years ago. Although he is still married with his same wife but she is not staying with him. Reason...she could not tolerate his character. He has four children and non wants to follow his footstep. He claimed he works everyday, from Monday to Sunday but yet business is bad and unproductive. The only breaks he took was the Chinese New Year when he might visit some near relatives. He had never gone for any holiday since 30 years ago.

While in Steven shop, I shared with him my life. Though I am of his age, I feel like I am 37 turning 36 only. I look forward to the world with challenges. Everyday is an exciting day for me coz I like to be playful with fun. Not only I have many young male friends but I have countless dears, honeys, darlings and one sweetheart out there. They are all my secret admirers who respect and adore me. I love them and they love me as well. I enjoy every moment of my life without regret.

Before I could finish my sharing with Steven, he interrupted me with force. This was what he said..."You are a disgrace of the old. As we age, we should age gracefully and not be playful and naughty like before". Added with ###@@@**** which were not pleasant to listen.

He claimed he is a wise person whom I should listen. I scratched by head with puzzle from the advices he had spoken. Should I follow his wisdom, when I should live an uninteresting life or life should be interesting no matter what age I am!!! In the car my driver asked..."Boss! Is Steven your uncle?" Thanks God! I am not Steven.

Food for the thought - "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you did not do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore dreams" - Mark Twain

Not easy to please everybody.

Ah Han is an old friend of more than 35 years. He is an non believer of life insurance. A typical Chinese who runs a nite foodstore selling satay. It was his late first wife who took the initiative of listening my advice before she effected a simple whole life plan for the husband 27 years ago. That was the time, I started selling life insurance. Could be she bought out of obligation rather than he needed the insurance. As a good wife, she faithfully paid her husband premium even he did not like it. Seven years ago, his wife passed away after a long sickness. After that, Ah Han refused to continue his own policy and quietly without my knowledge discontinued and surrendered his plan directly with our main office in town. I felt so sad when I knew about it later. I could not believe...wife paid and he benefited the saving.

Four years ago, I had a chance to meet up with him at his home. He was lonesome and his two children, a son and a daughter had left him ...for reasons I really won't know. My senses told me, he was no longer as young as before. He was already 57 years old, still stubborn than ever and stingy. I knew very well I had to press him again for life insurance because time was against him. Before age 60 all life insurances could be purchased but after age 6o no one would be interested to insure him. It took me much time, afford and patience before I could convince him. He kept saying that he did not need insurance protection because he had saving in the bank. He rather keep cash than holding a piece of paper in insurance. Reluctantly he signed a minimum hospital & surgical medical plan of the lowest benefit. To him, he felt that he was doing me a favour. For the first two years, he made me to collect his monthly premium at his home before I managed to request him to change to auto debit through his banker.

Recently Ah Han was admitted to the hospital where doctors diagnosed him to be suffering from liver cancer. He was accompanied by his second wife whom he remarried two years ago. When he was at the hospital, he wanted to admit to a single bedded room and be treated in a first class comfort. However when he was told his medical insurance could pay only the minimum benefits, he and his wife became upset and furious. Although he was discharged recently, the hospital reminded him to prepare the money needed for the follow-up treatment. It would cost him a bomb!!

Today I had a chance to meet them at his home again. Before I could brief them how his existing plan could help him on his long term care, his wife furiously threw her anger at me. Claiming these remarks...what a lousy company you represented!..no first class benefits!.. we have little saving now, who is going to pay for all his medical fees!.. We had paid diligently four years premium and he did not get the full benefits from you! ... the medicine and drugs are expensive! ... my husband cannot be working any more at the food store! ... our income will drop! ..who is going to take care of us! ...what happen if he dies! .... his two children are not bothering his father! ...he has no saving in the bank! .... we are at lost! ... please help us!!!!!

Her husband was listening. He did not utter a word. Deep in his heart, I knew he was sad and regretted for not listening my sincere advices fours years ago. I held his arm firmly and said..."Ah Han, I will do my best within my means. You may not get the best from this medical plan but at least part of your burden is taken care". He nodded his head acknowledging his guilt.

Wondering myself now...have I done right? Perhaps somebody out there can tell me.

Something I learned now - "You can never get enough of the things you don't need, because the things you don't need can never satisfy." - Marvin J. Ashton

Pull or push?

One of my friend, Eugene is migrating to Australia soon. According to him, there are two main factors for leaving the country. Either is the pull or push or both factors. The pull factor is the attraction from the migrating country provides and the push factor is from the country originated from. Currently he is affected by both factors, which give him more reasons to move.

The pull and push are interesting words to me. Without the pull of my clients, I would not have lasted so long in my business. Their 'pull' comes in the form of respect, value and hopes which attracted me to work harder. I consider the push is good and not a negative force in me. Without pushing myself, I won't have been successful in the first place. Further more without pushing, nothing would move.

Even in winning over women, men need the pull and push. The ladies have to be intelligence and attractive, to pull the attention of men. Without this pull of woman's charm, men won't push so hard to gain the love from them. Whether we like it or not, the forces of pull and push are important in our life. Know where to locate the pulling energy and tap the pushing force to get what you want.

Food for the thought - "Dare to reach out your hand into the darkness, to pull another hand into the light" - Norman B. Rice.

9 + 1 = ONE brain

Is there a remote control to adjust the look of a person? Sounds funny!!! Isn't it? If a lady is too sexy, some would say she is bad...not good for good man. If her busts are huge, you say she is tempting or if they are small, you complain....ayah!!! flat like airstrip. If she is attractive, you say she wants to attract attention but if she is simple, you don't want to look at her. This is not only applicable to ladies, men like us are not spared too. I dress young with fanciful sport shirt and jean, they said I am naughty and playful but if I change to dull and simple clothing, they said my days are gone.

Not only look is commented coz emotion is being observed as well. If a lady is too romantic and loving, you say she is bitchy and itchy but if she is not...you say she is not a woman. I am a caring and loving man who dare to express my feeling openly. They said I am a playful naughty old man. If I pretend to be a goodie goodie person, they said I have lost my manhood already. Which ever way, we try to look and feel...the world will still criticise and comment on us. The only way to live is to live for yourself. Be happy with what you are and not afraid of what others see in you.

While writing on my blog, I am learning from those who shared on my readers' comment columns too. Yesterday one of my regular reader, Red Lavender wrote something interesting which I like to share. She said...."A saying = A man have 9 brains while the woman have 1 brain. To conclude a man + woman = complete brain. The fact is, noone can live alone, there must be that someone who makes us the wise person to enrich the relationship and develop it to become what we call LOVE. Love give us meaning to life and everything with love becomes so balance when managed wisely by the man and supported well by the woman. Its the fact of life..GOD works in amazing ways".

Have to tell little darling, I have the 9 brains and she has the one to make it complete our brain. With it, we have LOVE.... we need not be bother how people look at us. Coz love has the miracle of life. Thank you Red Lavender for such simple formula of love.

Food for the heart - "Only when we give joyfully, without hesistation or thought of gain, can we truly know what love means" - Leo Buscaglie

To love with trust and joy.

Coming back to Irena's topic two days ago on.. "U can't sell when U are unhappy"... I was saying that I will attempt to write further ...."To love with trust and joy". Perhaps is a public holiday tomorrow, I think many Malaysian would be free to enjoy reading this title, especially those who are unhappy over romance love.

Though love has pleasure, pain is unavoidable with it. To be in love or to be beloved, is a sensational feeling. You can easily notice those who are in love with their joyful eyes and their smiles are always sweet. Be careful...not when you have fallen out of love or should there be any misunderstanding on love, your sunken face will show.

Irena had complained that her boyfriend has caused her miserably because he is the very possessive type. He disallowed her to meet male prospects and clients, and restricted her movement. His jealousy is so strong, which inconvenient Irena to meeting all her male friends. I really felt sorry for Irena who has lost her freedom over night.

I might have not seen Irena boyfriend before but with her description, I strongly believe this man definitely lacks personal confidence. To love a person, is to care for her and making sure she is happy and joyful all the time no matter what happen. He has to be patience and kind to her. Love does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered and it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Loving the person, he has to put in the extra effort. Love always hopes and perseveres which will lead to trust. Unless the man understands totally what is love, he will fail in love.

My little darling is an intelligently mature and very attractive lady. Though sometime I might feel jealous a little when she goes to meet some important males, I will never stop her in all her meetings with others. Deep down in my heart I actually feel proud that others are admiring her beauty and intelligence. I have the fullest trust in her because I am capable to love her more strongly than any men around. If for any reasons, there is another better man who can win her even though I have given my best, I have to give way for such a man. Loving her is to make sure she has the best in everything. To make sure I am always the deserving man for her, I cannot take her for granted but to continue to shower her all my passionate love forever. Only those who do not have the confidence, thought that by controlling their love, relationship might last. In actual fact, love is locked through the heart and not the mind. You give the heart the trust and the mind the joy.

To the one I love - "May our relationship last forever. May I sail upon your sea. May we go through life together. May there be always be a WE. May I be your endless sky. May your breathe my gentle air. May you never wonder why! Each time you look for me, I am there. May we be for each a smile. Like the warm, life giving sun. Yet we are in pain awhile. May our suffering be one. May we share our special days. The happiness one for two. And if we go separate ways. Let my love remains be with you."

Listen to my silence.

Is funny! A 'No' could be a 'Yes'....if only you know better! My friend, Ah Fai was waiting for a respond from his new found friend, a voluptuous girl whom he is very much interested in. They had been chatting quite often over the phone. He wanted to date her out but each time when he requested for an outing, she would divert her attention to something else. He is scratching his head, wondering whether she isn't interested in him. Though he is an intelligent man, he isn't smart to understand the feeling of woman. Seeking my advice, I told him.... in contract law, silence doesn't mean one is agreeable. However when a girl who has interest over a man, silence means agreed. No woman would declare her love first to her man, neither would she kisses him if he doesn't make the first move. If the man has intention to kiss his new found girlfriend, he can't be asking for a kiss from her. He has to be smart to understand from her facial silence, whether she is agreeable to be kissed upon. At the same time, the man has got to be brave to shower her the confidence of romance. As he moves towards her, the silence of voice plus the closing of her eyes is a confirmation of a 'Yes'. Meaning she loves him and she is too willing to be hugged and kissed. Ah Fai.... her silence is also a 'Yes'...you should go ahead with the date.

Closing a sale is liking closing a romance. No prospect will reveal his true intention of buying a product or services. An experience salesperson observes the emotion of his prospect from his eyes and words. His silence doesn't mean is a 'No' but just that he has the pride not to say it as 'Yes'. So! Gently and softly, we have to treat him like closing a girl and encouraging her onto bed. So the next time when you got a 'No' on any occassion, think first before you accept it as 'No'. Perhaps is a 'Yes'.

Food for thought - "Silence is sometimes the best answer". — The Dalai Lama.

U can't sell when U are unhappy.

Irena called me, "Sifu! I am worried my business is bad. Most appointments are cancelled and I don't have many prospects to see. I am at lost and I don't know what to do. Can you help?"

Though Irena is a 5 years term life insurance agent, many other agents could possibly fall into such dilemma and not knowing what to do next. I only spoke to Irena on the telephone but her voice sounded unhappy from inside. The company could be offering many challenges and incentives at the tail end of the year or her agency manager is motivating and encouraging her to move, but when her heart and mind is unhappy....nothing will excite our poor Irena to work. If I could sense her voice is unhappy, I am sure those successful prospects whom she intended to approach would also be able to feel and notice. When a person is unhappy, the voice lacks confidence, the face doesn't grow with charm, the eyes are dull and the words spoken are not sweet. She might try to hide her unhappiness feeling, but without she realising, the emotion was translated to tension and stress which could be seen by others. Nobody likes to deal with an unhappy person because an unhappy person might be an unsuccessful person. Always remember this!!!

I reminded Irena this powerful quote - "A happy heart sees a beautiful world". If you are truly happy, nothing will stop you from moving. Upon checking with her on love and romance which is the most vital part of a young lady's life....she told me later...she is extremely unhappy with her present boyfriend, who is very possessive and making her lives miserably. Ahhh! That is!!! Her problem is not the market isn't good for selling but rather she is hindered by LOVE. Love has joy and it has pain as well.

Suggestion to Irena. Either she solves her matters with her boyfriend or introduce him to me, when I can enlighten both of them. Or give me sometimes, I will write a subject on..To love with trust and joy.

Food for thought - "Jealousy, that dragon which slays love under the pretence of keeping it alive." - Havelock Ellis

Love & career need determination.

Selling life insurance is like loving a person. To fall in love is easy but to maintain a love relationship is difficult. All loves and romances begin with excitement and happiness. Everyday is a joyful day when you are in love. The sight and smell of love create feeling of hope and desire. However along the journey of love, there bound to have obstacles of life. As long as there are emotion and feeling in love, misunderstanding and distrust might appear. It takes a lot of understanding and wisdom to withhold the strength of love. Unless your love is strong with passion and determination, not many loves could last a life time.

Selling life insurance at the beginning is exciting too. The company paints you a rosy picture of your dreams. You could almost get the impossible which you never had dreamed off. They offer you the fantastic holidays around the world, prestigious clubs, luxurious cars, expensive homes, unlimited income to be earned and more incentives to excite the beginners. The smell of these sensational offers would make all young agents go crazy. Nothing in this world comes easy! All success goes along with your hardwork, determination, concentration and prepared to take all hardship. The most difficult task in this business is rejection. Sometimes you need to take 20 rejection of 'NO' before you could receive one 'YES'. Meaning... is like being slapped 20 times before one pretty girl accepts your date. There might be many agents selling life insurance, not many could actually be able to stay long enough to deliver what they had promised.

So! Its like love and romance, if you are one agent who is reading my blog, do you really have the strong love, passion and determination to maintain in this tough business. Otherwise, most likely you would not last a life time like me. Selling is easy but to maintain it is definitely not easy and that goes with love as well.

William Shakespeare - Three sentences for success....a) Know more than others. b) Work more than others. c) Expect less than others.

Start the day with a cup of tea.

Myself and little darling are tea drinkers. Without a good cup of tea in the morning, we will just feel lousy for the whole day. Yesterday was a bad one because we were served tea without enough 'love' added. There was no hommm in it !!Though the breakfast was taken, we never felt happier after that. Tea isn't like beer which could be taken more. The most we could drink are three or two cups of tea or coffee per day. A good tea should be served hot with ceramic cup and spoon. The tea leaves have to be chosen right of good quality, colour and taste. Most importantly the passion of serving tea must be there. The most ideal person who can make me a nice cup of tea or coffee is my little darling coz she put in a lot of effort in making it. This is what I called LOVE added.

Drinking tea has many purposes, including doing business. Its always difficult to secure a business appointment but is easier to invite our contacts for a cup of tea. Over a tea or coffee, I had connected countless business opportunities and sales. Is uncomfortable to meet prospects in their offices or homes but over a cup of tea or coffee outside, I built bridges to reach their hearts. Friends or clients might be unhappy with you for some reasons, take them out for a cup of tea or coffee, magic would happen to make them laugh again. If you like a sweet girl and have intention to court her, the simpliest way to get to know her better...is to invite her for a cup of coffee or tea. Most love and romance starts from there. Without the excuse of a cup of tea, I would not have known my little darling then. For a cost of two dollars only!

Like I said, a good cup of tea to start the day and another to end the evening of sensational boat rocking. My little darling always asked, "tea, coffee or me?"

This is interesting - "The best quality tea must have creases like the leather boot of Tartar horsemen, curl like the dewlap of a mighty bullock, unfold like a mist rising out of a ravine, gleam like a lake touched by a zephyr, and be wet and soft like a fine earth newly swept by rain." - Yu Lu

Patience is a winning game.

I believe a creative person thinks faster than those who are non creative. I am one of them. It's good to be able to think ahead while talking to others. Meaning, before you finish your sentences...most likely I already have an answer for you. It took me a long time to control my thought and calmness. Just imagine...I have to keep listening, when I knew what you are trying to relate. If I interrupt your discussion, you might be offended or perhaps you might feel inferior for being a slow speaker. On the hand, to listen and knowing what you are trying to tell me, needs a lot of patience and tolerance. During my earlier years in business, I got very irritated, if I happened to meet slow thinkers due to impatience of listening. As I was also a methodical person who had high expectation in lives, made things even worst. I got angry easily and lost my temper without realising, I was offending many friends and relatives then. Through mistakes, I learned to slow down my thought and emotion. I set three important rules to control myself. They are 'don't worry', 'expect a little' and 'give a lot' in my interaction with others. After all, nobody in this world could be the same, some are smart and some are not so smart. I have a faithful secretary who has been working with me for sixteen years. Though she has all the experiences of my work, she still makes mistakes at times. The only explanation I could give is...if she could think like me, she won't have to work for me any longer. Most likely she would have be selling and turning herself to be another professional. I have lowered my expectation on others and listen more patiently without loosing my temper. It takes a bit of wisdom to understand life...so that I could live more happily with others. I sincerely hope you don't make the same mistakes of my past.

A good piece of advice -"Little by little, through patience and repeated effort, the mind will become stilled in the Self." - Bhagavad Gita

Beauty of the heart is more important.

Today's woman is much more attractive than before. In our life insurance industry, we have more female agents than the male. Each time, I walk into our office, there are more ladies than the gentlemen. Like this afternoon, I was surrounded by all ladies and I was the only man in the lift. Perhaps I was lucky to have all the pretty, beautiful, intelligent and attractive girls around. From the head to their toes, they looked gorgeous and eyes catching. To be presentable in their career, I am sure they are taught to dress well. Their hair-do come with the latest style and mixed with special colouring. A lot of money is spent on their faces to look charming. Cosmetic and facial cleansing are not cheap either. Besides the facial, they have to pick the latest clothing to blend according to their taste and fancy. Not forgetting to add some costume jewelleries to bring out their fashion. Next would be the proper high heel shoes to spur their elegant walk. No prospect would denial such beauties to their appointments. And that's why most male agents are loosing to the woman.

I might not be attractive as to these lady agents, but I have the beauty of a sincere heart which matters most. Should they have spent more time to develop a beautiful heart, I think all men and including me will be out of business. Perhaps The Universe is fair...they have the beauty of the outside and I have to the beauty of the heart. At the spur of the second, I will loose to them because sight is faster than hearing and sensing. All prospects love to see a beautiful lady agent but those who come with a beautiful heart will naturally build a longer relationship in business. However life is very funny! The outside beauty could be dressed and beautified but the inner beauty of the heart cannot be made except it comes blissfully by itself. Coz sincerity comes from the heart.

Food for the heart - "Sincerity and truth are the basis of every virtue." - Confucius

Smart cunning thinking.

Could not finish my smart story last nite. Here I am to continue the connection on being smart. Chong's story was 35 years ago. Today, I have another similar one which happened 15 years ago. It goes like this...there was this young man, Alvin who was only 23 then. With just one year experience working as an accounts executive serving an advertising agency, Alvin together with his girl friend, started their own advertising media. Although they worked very hard, it wasn't easy to gain entry to those big accounts. Most established companies preferred to work with the international house. Alvin with his creative mind, engaged two white men, one as art director and the other as managing director for his own company. Both were paid as part timer or to be paid whenever their services were required. The both white man names were printed onto their company profiles to look impressive. Each time when Alvin needed to see an important appointment, he would bring along the part-time MD and art director to show their credential. Instead his name card was printed as accounts director, thought he was the real owner of his firm. The white men were just to show their faces on the first visit and later Alvin was to follow all future calls. It was unbelievable! The business came pouring in with lesser afford.

The Asian always claimed the white man is intelligence by the fact of their look and personality. They might be intelligence but it's the smartness of a person who uses the craftiness to overrule the intelligent. Chong and Alvin were those who knew how to overcome the acceptance of being smart. Chong was my friend and Alvin is my first son.

Today we the Asian have not changed much. Even my principle company still appoints an English man to be the CEO of our business in Malaysia. You might not like it but that is the fact of life in Asia. I wonder when we are going to change!!!

Food for the thought - "Simulated disorder postulates perfect discipline; simulated fear postulates courage; simulated weakness postulates strength." - Lao-Tzu

Smart story.

I think this was smart...

A true story of 35 years ago when I was a young salesman then. Chong was trying to sell a home made cough mixture originated by his grand father. Although the Chinese medicine was good but very few shops were prepared to retail for Chong. One day, accidentally he picked up a white man from the trunk road, who was hitchhiking his way from abroad. He was penniless and needed assistance. Chong brought him home, fed and clothed him well. The white man looked so different after he shaved plus added with the proper attire. Before he continued his journey, Chong requested him for some favours...to accompany him on his work. Chong took the white man to all his retail customers, telling them that the white man was the boss from England, which manufacted his cough mixture. The white man just needed to nod and smile to all those typical Chinese shopkeepers who were so happy to see him at their shops. After that, Chong didn't have to explain much about his products anymore. They were too satisfy to buy because they felt the cough mixture had the influence of the West...it must be a good product. Chong was smart to play the mind of his customers. His products became popular and it sells by itself now.

There is a saying from the Asian..."When a white man farts, it would still be a good fart".

All men must read!

I found something interesting...

In the world of romance, one single rule applies to men:
Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points.Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES.

You make the bed (+1)

You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)

You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)

In the rain (+8) But return with Beer (-5)

You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)

You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)

You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)

You pummel it with iron rod (+10)

It's her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

You stay by her side the entire party (0)

You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)

Named Rita (-4)

Rita is a dancer (-6)

Rita is single and is really beautiful (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY

You forget her birthday (-50000)

You take her out to dinner (0)

You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)

Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)

And it's all-you-can- eat night (-3)

It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can- eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

You take her to a movie (+2)

You take her to a movie she likes (+4)

You take her to a movie you hate (+6)

You take her to a movie you like (-2)

It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)

You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION

She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]

You hesitate in responding (-10)

You reply, "Where?" (-35)

Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks Like a concerned __expression (0)

You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)

You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)

She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

Now what chance do you have???

Food for the thought - "Men show their character in nothing more clearly than what they think laughable." - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

Smart selling.

Over a training session with some young agents, I was asked..."How do I maintain selling so long in my life insurance business?" I told them, I am not intelligence but luckily I am smart.

Most of my school mates who were intelligence became doctors, lawyers or engineers. However I am smart to make them to be my clients. I am smart to know what they needs and wants. Whenever they are unhappy or sorrowful, I am smart to see in their mind. I am smart to offer them solution and make them happy. I am smart when to increase their insurance too.

Life insurance has a lot to learn. You need to be intelligence to understand all aspect of the protection and investment products. It takes a long time to master the entire program and plan. More so the products and features keep changing all the time. However I am smart to propose all relevant insurance products as simple as possible to all my prospects. Too complex and too comprehensive lead to confusion, whereas simplicity is easier to understand. I might not be an intelligent financial consultant which most life insurance agents claim (those titles stated on their name cards), but I am smart to touch all those I met and made them to be my closed friends eventually.

Most new agents who came along with an university degree and have brilliant mind, have fear to make cold calls on telephone. I am not as intelligence like them but I am smart to make strangers laugh on the phone with me. Upon meeting prospects, agents show their intelligence by figures and facts laid down through their laptops. I can't do that but I am smart to market myself by sharing my wisdom of life. Though my explanation on insurance is short and simple, they took it more willingly than from intelligent agents. I can't be as youthful as those aspiring agents, but I am smart to win all my clients with my wittiness and cheekiness. Yes! I admit...I am not intelligence but I am smart to keep my career as a hobby, which allows me to talk endlessly, have fun and excitement with all those I interact, and be able to help those who needed me. I enjoy every moment of my selling because I open my heart and mind to others.

Food for the thought - "It is lack of love for ourselves that inhibits our compassion towards others. If we make friends with ourselves, then there is no obstacle to opening our hearts and minds to others" - Unknown.